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I might be quiet for a little while.....(baby mentioned)


Forum: Trying to Conceive Your First Child

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  #1  
August 20th, 2013, 10:16 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,345
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My SIL's been admitted for an induction. Gel's in... pitocin in the morning. No medical reason.. just tired of being pregnant.

I am literally holding myself together by my fingernails right now. The only reason I haven't just wrapped my arms around myself and sobbed is I'm afraid DH will wake up and walk out and find me crying.

I really thought by the end of her pregnancy the feeling of "that should be MY baby." would go away.. but it has not. So it might take me a few days to pull my head out of the sand and be back to rights. So if my replies sound void and empty.. it's cause my head's not on right.


I leave you with some sad music videos:

I Would Die For That - YouTube

Daughtry - Gone Too Soon (Official) - YouTube
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #2  
August 21st, 2013, 03:26 AM
Nerd
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  #3  
August 21st, 2013, 04:11 AM
Ariw's Avatar Veteran
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  #4  
August 21st, 2013, 04:50 AM
girlsofsummer's Avatar Us two became we three <3
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Pittsburgh (Go Steelers!)
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Much love girlie. You can do this <3
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Mirielle Margaret born 4/24
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  #5  
August 21st, 2013, 06:37 AM
Super Mommy to be
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,146
hugs hugs hugs Ash!
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
Phillipians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
'Blessings' by Laura Story (What if trials of this life, are your mercies in disguise)
Glorious Ruins
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  #6  
August 21st, 2013, 06:49 AM
KellJoO's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Wisconsin
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Big hugs, Ash.
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Kelley
Cautiously Expecting #1

IT'S A GIRL!!!

One Angel in Heaven lost @ 6Weeks 2/7/2013
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  #7  
August 21st, 2013, 08:16 AM
Cait&AngelAbove's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 10,629
I'm sorry Ashley! We all understand so take all the time you need!
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Thank you so much Bokkechick for the perfect siggie!!!
12-10-10 2-6-12
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  #8  
August 21st, 2013, 08:42 AM
butterfly721's Avatar TTC #1
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 2,613
I'm so sorry, Ashley. *HUGS*
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April 8.16.13
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  #9  
August 21st, 2013, 11:00 AM
hopelessly wishing's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: California
Posts: 546
Hugs Hugs
I know the feeling. Especially of not wanting to cry and someone see or hear me.
We will have ours one day. And it will beautiful.

Last edited by hopelessly wishing; August 21st, 2013 at 01:19 PM.
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  #10  
August 21st, 2013, 11:40 AM
Just keep breathing.
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,960
My heart is going out to you- I know just how you feel. Hang in there, friend.
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  #11  
August 21st, 2013, 11:53 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
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My Dh isn't the most understanding person in all of this. In fact he might be the LEAST understanding person... I don't blame him, he doesn't know how to cope with this type of thing... but he feels that I should still be able to be happy for people even if I'm not happy. Sometimes I can.. other times? no. It doesn't help that I've had nothing but trouble from my SIL's since DH and I started dating (they dislike that I try and be a parent to Reme and that DH and his ex have put me ahead of them in the chain of command).

Though I suspect that the issue lies in the fact I have no relationship with them, it's my first niece or nephew (it's a boy, Wesley) and I will be "uncle woody's wife" and she will be "Aunt L"... it stings One of my brother's needs to have a kid.

They just broke her water... I keep repeating to myself "alcohol makes you fat. Alcohol makes you fat." but I'd kill for a ice coffee with kahlua.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #12  
August 21st, 2013, 01:26 PM
hopelessly wishing's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: California
Posts: 546
I've been with my dh for 5 yrs now. And in that 5 years his sister has had 3 kids making it a total of four kids by four different men and none of them are with her now. I was soo mad each time and still till this day have nothing to do with her kids. I mean me and dh are soo much closer to my family anyways which makes it easier, but when we are around his family and the kids I'm so uneasy. I thought I was the only person who felt this way and thought something was wrong with me. It's just not fair.
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  #13  
August 21st, 2013, 02:14 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,345
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They used my dad's name as his middle name... we had planned on using it ourselves.. now DH won't use it. I'm a sobbing blubbering mess.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #14  
August 21st, 2013, 02:33 PM
butterfly721's Avatar TTC #1
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I'm sorry! Sometimes my DH isn't the most understanding person either.
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April 8.16.13
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  #15  
August 21st, 2013, 02:45 PM
momology's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 6,296
Oh Ashley I am so very sorry. That is so so tough It just makes it all even worse that they are using your Dad's name too I could go for a drink too. . . I wish we could meet up and grab one.

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Thank you *Kiliki* for the amazing siggy!!

Expecting our first baby August 25th, 2014!!!


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  #16  
August 21st, 2013, 02:50 PM
BabyBirdies's Avatar over the rainbow?
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Manhattan :)
Posts: 1,846
I'm so sorry Ashley - especially about the name thing
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #17  
August 22nd, 2013, 06:37 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 669
I am so sorry Ashley!! I wish I could go over and give you a big hug in person. I think DH needs to budge and let you use the name anyway. It is a middle name and it is YOUR FATHERS! Not like they could every accuse you of "stealing" it (although who cares anyway??).
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  #18  
August 22nd, 2013, 06:40 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Derbyshire, UK
Posts: 4,982
I'm so sorry Ashley, especilaly that theyre using your dad's name. Thats understandbly rough - if you need a drink hun - have one!
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  #19  
August 22nd, 2013, 08:28 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,345
Send a message via MSN to plan4fate
nope, I behaved.. I survived the night with no more tears.. even got to look at a picture of him and it didn't make me cry (he's so tiny, but he is cute).
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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