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Livid, just livid


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  #21  
January 5th, 2010, 06:50 AM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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He's on the bus for 3 1/2 hrs. of his day? Oh my. That would really bother me too.
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  #22  
January 5th, 2010, 07:22 AM
TheOtherMichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I hope you find out more to the story to ease your mind, but regardless from everything you've said it really sounds like it's time to move on.
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  #23  
January 6th, 2010, 01:53 PM
Tofu Bacon
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Well, the crap has hit the fan. I'll update as soon as I can.
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  #24  
January 6th, 2010, 02:01 PM
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Im interested in what happened!
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  #25  
January 6th, 2010, 02:09 PM
Nekinna2402's Avatar Anniken <3 Tanja
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Sorry ti\o hear...
will be looking out for an update from you
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  #26  
January 7th, 2010, 06:47 AM
Tofu Bacon
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Okay, so here's where we're at.

I wasn't sure how to proceed with the whole thing; dh and I both agreed that he wasn't seriously hurt but at the same time, the aide should at least be warned for inappropriately restraining him. Instead of calling the school first, I called my district's preschool special ed office because they have always been so helpful, and I have a good relationship with them. I went down yesterday morning to tell them what happened, and also to withdraw ds from special ed services. They understood why we were so upset, but of course were a bit cautious about it, which I completely understand because all we have to go by is ds' word. I told her "Look, we're not looking to have the woman crucified. We believe our son because he has been 100% consistent with his version of the events, but we weren't there so we aren't going to suggest that it was deliberate, and its not like he was injured. We just ant to pull him out of the school and move on with our lives. The school can handle it however they want to handle it." So, the chairperson told me she would call the school and let them know ds would no longer be attending. Other than that, it didn't sound like much was going to come of it.

During this time, dh was on the hone with the school nurse, trying to get to the bottom of when ds was brought to her office, and whether or not it relates to the grabbing incident.

A little while later, we got a call from the director of ds' program at the school. She wanted to hear our side of the story, and then went on to say that *I* acted outside of the chain of command by not contacting her first, and that there would have been an investigation had I done so. I answered with something to the effect of "So, nothing is done because I didn't follow your rules? Quite frankly, I have more of a relationship with my district office and they have earned my trust." I knew she was bluffing anyway; just because its a private school doesn't mean they can just do what they want, especially since (when it comes to special ed) they are on the bottom of the chain of command because they are receiving funds from the district, who receives funds from the county, who receives funds from the state, who receives funds from the federal government; when a parent abruptly pulls their kid from a program and willingly discontinues special ed services... they're going to want to know why. Dh got on the phone with her for a few minutes to, and wanted her to know that even if the issues were resolved we still wouldn't send ds back, simply because he's been unhappy there since day one, and we can no longer justify this long commute when he isn't even getting individual therapy anymore. She started going on about how wonderfully ds was doing and he is so well-liked, yada yada, so dh was like "Have you read his quarterly report? According to the report he is not doing well in a class and is not able to socialize with his peers." Then dh mentioned the video we have from the holiday party, where all of the kids are doing a song and dance they learned, while ds is just standing there looking spaced-out, and none of the staff bothered to assist him. Anyway, so we left off with her basically saying they'd talk to the aide and the case would be closed.

Soooo, a little while later I call a call from an independent something or other, who would be overseeing the administrative investigation. I'm guessing the school had planned on not to go forward with it, but the district backed them up against the wall so they had to, which makes sense because its the districts who recommend their school to families with special needs children; the district isn't going to keep funding them if the school would knowingly squash a case of alleged abuse. So, I repeated ds' version of the events and she said they were moving forward with the investigation and would be questioning everyone in the class to see if they witnessed the incident, or anything similar in the past.

Then last night we got another call from the district office because they want me to come in again tomorrow.
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  #28  
January 7th, 2010, 08:03 AM
frgsonmysox's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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wow...glad they are investigating it!
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  #29  
January 7th, 2010, 08:19 AM
Cereal Killer's Avatar I'm climbin' in yo window
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Wow Cori! I am sorry! I hope that they investigate this and proper action is taken. I think that teacher should, at minimum, be suspended pending the investigation. I can't imagine any sort of behavior that would justify restraining a child by his/her neck!
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  #30  
January 7th, 2010, 08:37 AM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm glad there is an investigation going on and even if it ends up that they don't fire the aid, there "should" at least be a file on her if something happens with another child. The school cannot say there were never any red flags.
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  #31  
January 7th, 2010, 09:14 AM
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Wow, that is just terrible! I'd definitely call the nurse first thing and get all your ducks in a row and go to the principal! That is just unnacceptable, and even though he won't be going back I'm sure you'd never want another kid going through that. I just don't understand people. If someone doesn't have the patience to work with little ones they shouldn't be doing it!
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  #32  
January 7th, 2010, 12:57 PM
melkissa2004's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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What a nightmare. I am glad they are investigating though!
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  #33  
January 7th, 2010, 01:15 PM
aussiemummy
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Yep I'm with Susie. I am feeling really angry for you too
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  #34  
January 7th, 2010, 08:24 PM
TheOtherMichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Wow! Did you ever find out what happened with the nurse?

Good luck with all of this!
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  #35  
January 8th, 2010, 06:46 AM
Tofu Bacon
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The nurse said that his teacher brought him to her toward the end of the day (so its likely that the incident happened prior to being brought to the nurse) and that he cried and refused to let her help him. Ds confirmed this and he said he was afraid because didn't know the "doctor girl"; that in itself is a huge red-flag because its completely out of character for him to be afraid of an adult, even if he doesn't know her. Dh said the nurse tried to brush it off by saying something like "Oh, he was probably red from from being outside, or maybe he had a reaction to something." but most of all she sounded very apprehensive about talking to him. We know he didn't play outside, and I suppose an allergic reaction is *possible* but only realistic if they gave him foods that I didn't pack for him or aren't on his list, which has happened several times this year.
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