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Livid, just livid


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  #1  
January 4th, 2010, 02:39 PM
Tofu Bacon
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Ds came home from school today and said "Miss M" (the aide in his class) hurt him. I asked him to explain what happened and he said he was spinning and "Miss M" asked him to stop, and when he didn't stop she grabbed him by the neck!! Now, I will be the first to say that he often has him own perception of events, but in those situation his story will change several times. I very casually asked him more than once to show me what happened and he demonstrated the same thing each time. I am just so angry right now!!! I want to give the aide the benefit of doubt, but I've never been impressed with her, and there has been an ongoing issue with the level of support ds needs; he's had a very difficult time adjusting to being in a class after being 1:1 with a teacher all last year and absolutely hates going.

He's obviously not going back, and as soon as dh gets home we're going to discuss what to due as far as the aide is concerned. I can understand needing to physically restrain him if he's hurting himself or someone else, but grabbing him by the neck??? He's not even 5 years old and is a peanut!!
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  #2  
January 4th, 2010, 02:42 PM
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Um, wow. That's nuts, hopefully you get to the bottom of it. I'd be calling every person in the school right now to get to the bottom of it.
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  #3  
January 4th, 2010, 02:54 PM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Go with your gut. If you are already uncomforatable with this woman, there's usually a reason for it. If she's too rough or had a bad moment that she couldn't contain, she probably shouldn't be working with the little ones. I'm sorry.....we had a bad experience with an aide when dd was in K and although she didn't stay on the job long, it was very upsetting.
(((((hugs)))))
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  #4  
January 4th, 2010, 02:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tammyjh View Post
Go with your gut. If you are already uncomforatable with this woman, there's usually a reason for it. If she's too rough or had a bad moment that she couldn't contain, she probably shouldn't be working with the little ones.
(((((hugs)))))
I agree. You with your gut for sure. I hope this gets resolved.
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  #5  
January 4th, 2010, 03:32 PM
irishxrose
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Quote:
Originally Posted by melkissa2004 View Post
I agree. You with your gut for sure. I hope this gets resolved.
I agree too. I'm sorry Cori. I really hope everything gets resolved and quickly. Nobody should touch a child like that, especially a special needs child. That's just not right.

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  #6  
January 4th, 2010, 03:35 PM
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regardless of what your son was doing, a neck is never an appropriate place to grab a child!
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  #7  
January 4th, 2010, 03:43 PM
**Badfish**'s Avatar Worth Saving
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I'm sorry, Cori I'm upset for you, so I can't even imagine how you must feel. Poor little guy.
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  #9  
January 4th, 2010, 03:53 PM
WineKeepsMeSane's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ugh, I am so sorry! That's awful, and completely inexcusable
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  #10  
January 4th, 2010, 04:30 PM
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Omg! I can't imagine how you feel right now. I would be livid too. KUP on what you do with in regards to the aide. Wow, just wow.
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  #11  
January 4th, 2010, 04:40 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
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Does he have any marks or anything on his neck? If so, take pictures.

I would file a complaint (but after calming down a bit) as hard as that might be, but sometimes it's better to deal with something in a calmer tone than in the heat of the moment.
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  #12  
January 4th, 2010, 04:41 PM
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omg I ditto the above I am so sorry I'm glad your little boy told you about it that woman needs to loose her job
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  #13  
January 4th, 2010, 04:41 PM
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Yeah, I would be livid. I would definitely talk with the teacher before pulling him out though, esp if your son likes school otherwise. That aide should be fired for touching a child inappropriately like that.
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  #14  
January 4th, 2010, 06:26 PM
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  #15  
January 4th, 2010, 07:52 PM
Tofu Bacon
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It just breaks my heart to think of him feeling so small and scared. The only reason we are hesitant on what to do about the aide is because there are no marks and ds doesn't know if anyone else saw... plus it is a possibility that she didn't *intend* to grab him the way she did, since he was spinning at all, but I'm not totally sure because he hasn't been acting like himself since we got home.

Its really not a hardship to pull him out, since we are going to homeschool anyway. This whole school year has been really cruddy and he's not getting the support he needs; they just expect him to blend in with the rest of the class. Plus, not exactly related but still an issue, more kids have been added to his bus route, which now brings his bus ride to 1.5 hours there and nearly 2 hours back. So, that's it.
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  #16  
January 4th, 2010, 08:05 PM
SweetSimpleThings's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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If you were planning to homeschool, maybe this is just his guardian angel nudging you in that direction a little quicker. And, aside from this issue, dang that is a long bus ride

I'm sorry you had to deal with that, it makes my stomach hurt when I think about DS being scared in a situation, so I can't imagine how you felt
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  #17  
January 4th, 2010, 09:12 PM
Tofu Bacon
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Yeah, I'm thinking it was just the kick n the pants I needed.

To add more to the mystery, I was cleaning out his backpack a little while ago and found a note from the nurse saying that he was brought in today because his face was "very red" and she applied a cool compress. They didn't play outside (being barely 16 degrees today) and he doesn't remember if went to the nurse before or after the incident with Miss M...
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  #18  
January 4th, 2010, 09:43 PM
Nekinna2402's Avatar Anniken <3 Tanja
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That sounds odd... could you call the nurse and ask for more details about it?

I'm sorry you have to deal with this... A neck is really not the right place to be grabbing young kids from!



And i thought my 1 hr bus ride was bad... yikes..2...
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  #19  
January 4th, 2010, 09:52 PM
SusieQ2's Avatar Jersey Girl
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I'd march my buns into that school first thing tomorrow morning and having a meeting with the principal. I'd demand that the incident be investigated. Even if you have no intention on sending him back you should still let them know what happened. You letting the principal know could keep the same thing from happening to another child.

Oh and that's an absolutely ridiculously long bus ride!
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  #20  
January 5th, 2010, 06:04 AM
LorieB's Avatar Super Mommy
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Yikes, I am with Susie and the others on this one! I would absolutely furious and am for you right now.
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