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The perfect troll


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  #1  
August 5th, 2010, 05:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 3,258
This was on CafeMom and the responses were hilarious. You guys being the creative ones you are I'm sure could come up with some pretty funny stuff.

So, hypothetically speaking, if you were a troll, what attributes would you have? What would your stances be on things? How would you type and talk? What about a name?

Invent a troll!
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  #2  
August 5th, 2010, 05:56 PM
foxfire_ga79
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Hhhhmmmm, let's see.
I'd be a barrel racer who trains horses and gives riding lessons. I'd have a large farm of about 25 acres and at least 6 of my own horses. I wouldn't be married! lol I'd have curly hair, maybe red but most likely still blonde, and green eyes. Oh, and I'd be taller, none of this 5'2" nonsense. And NO FRECKLES! I'd have nicer teeth too.
But then I would die of bone cancer.
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  #3  
August 5th, 2010, 06:10 PM
**Badfish**'s Avatar Worth Saving
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Colorado
Posts: 7,141
I would have triplets. And twins. Sometimes I would type in ALL CAPS, and then just to confuse people, sometimes id refuse to capitalize and use punctuation. After gaining everyone's love and affection, I would have the giant realization that I'm a lesbian and leaving my husband for my girlfriend Lindsay Lohan. And then Mel Gibson would kill me and put me in a rose garden. Pray for my kids.
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  #4  
August 5th, 2010, 06:12 PM
Mom of 2 boys!
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,085
You guys are too funny.
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  #5  
August 5th, 2010, 06:14 PM
WineKeepsMeSane's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2007
Location: where chili has beans
Posts: 13,348
I'd say I was an engineer, happy with one kid, from some "weird" religion but pretty liberal anyways, probably Canadian. I'd make vague references to emotional issues from my childhood without ever expanding. Claim to have a house full of rescued animals. Awesome cloth diaper stash.


oh wait... crap. Did I just out myself?
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  #6  
August 5th, 2010, 10:22 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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^ I knew it!! LOL!



Let's see I am Anti Peta, Anti Feminist, Don't care for Tree Huggers & Hippies, Don't care to be PC, I love my SUV, Republican all the way & YES I do believe in GOD!

My siggie?

"There are hundreds of millions of gun owners in this country, and not one of them will have an accident today. The only misuse of guns comes in environments where there are drugs, alcohol, bad parents, and undisciplined children. Period."
Ted Nugent

“I'm not a role model, ... Just because I dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids.”
Charles Barkley

"Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework."
Bill Cosby

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  #7  
August 5th, 2010, 11:09 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 466
You're freaking me out Michelle! lol
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  #8  
August 6th, 2010, 06:54 AM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: North
Posts: 7,824
My username would be Mergy

I would be a hardcore Libertarian

My favorite debate would be seat belt laws

I would steal pics of someone else and pass them off as my own

I would have cancer

I would have alter egos ... my husband, brother, and cousin

I would talk to people on the phone to make it more believable

My husband would give out my snail mail addy(my real addy) to make it even more believable

I would die

My brother and cousin would create fake memorials

My cousin would find a fake leather box with fake letters~messages for select people

I would drag this out for at least a year and in the process of running my scam endear myself to a specific group.

And then....oh wait...its been done already...
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Abby (19), Kacie (13), Chase (11), & Jacob (7)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"...They're supposed to make you miserable! That's why they're family!" ~ Bobby ~ Supernatural
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  #9  
August 6th, 2010, 10:37 AM
Hey... Where's Perry?'s Avatar Darnit face
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Maryland
Posts: 2,134
I would have a masturbating problem, and find a way to always tie it into any debate..
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  #10  
August 6th, 2010, 10:45 AM
foxfire_ga79
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beyaztavsan View Post
I would have a masturbating problem, and find a way to always tie it into any debate..

Best one so far!
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  #11  
August 6th, 2010, 10:54 AM
**Badfish**'s Avatar Worth Saving
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Location: Colorado
Posts: 7,141
Michelle, that siggie is amazing. Haha!
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  #12  
August 6th, 2010, 11:14 AM
GinaB's Avatar Ex-Navy Lifetime NRA!
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: America
Posts: 4,139
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tammyjh View Post
My username would be Mergy

I would be a hardcore Libertarian

My favorite debate would be seat belt laws

I would steal pics of someone else and pass them off as my own

I would have cancer

I would have alter egos ... my husband, brother, and cousin

I would talk to people on the phone to make it more believable

My husband would give out my snail mail addy(my real addy) to make it even more believable

I would die

My brother and cousin would create fake memorials

My cousin would find a fake leather box with fake letters~messages for select people

I would drag this out for at least a year and in the process of running my scam endear myself to a specific group.

And then....oh wait...its been done already...
She gives trolls a bad name. That ^ is just pure trailer trash
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  #13  
August 6th, 2010, 11:23 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 466
Quote:
Originally Posted by beyaztavsan View Post
I would have a masturbating problem, and find a way to always tie it into any debate..
Thank you! I almost spit my drink out!!
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  #14  
August 6th, 2010, 08:03 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,679
Quote:
Originally Posted by (.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.) View Post
^ I knew it!! LOL!



Let's see I am Anti Peta, Anti Feminist, Don't care for Tree Huggers & Hippies, Don't care to be PC, I love my SUV, Republican all the way & YES I do believe in GOD!

My siggie?

"There are hundreds of millions of gun owners in this country, and not one of them will have an accident today. The only misuse of guns comes in environments where there are drugs, alcohol, bad parents, and undisciplined children. Period."
Ted Nugent

“I'm not a role model, ... Just because I dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids.”
Charles Barkley

"Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework."
Bill Cosby


I WIN I WIN!! Searching the debate boards reveals you to be PinkSand!!!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jess is Write View Post
Michelle, that siggie is amazing. Haha!
and it was a REAL poster sadly.
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"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #15  
August 6th, 2010, 08:24 PM
Undomesticated Housewife's Avatar Master(de)bater
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Warner Robins, Georgia
Posts: 1,622
I KNEW IT! I was going to ask earlier if she would also have Spanish speaking maids.. but I was thinking that she had something about autism in her siggy & didnt see it.. so it consurd me.
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  #16  
August 6th, 2010, 08:51 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lash View Post
I WIN I WIN!! Searching the debate boards reveals you to be PinkSand!!!!!



and it was a REAL poster sadly.


Quote:
Originally Posted by beyaztavsan View Post
I would have a masturbating problem, and find a way to always tie it into any debate..


Quote:
Originally Posted by LaceyLaceyBoBacey View Post
I KNEW IT! I was going to ask earlier if she would also have Spanish speaking maids.. but I was thinking that she had something about autism in her siggy & didnt see it.. so it consurd me.
She was a bodybuilding, organic-hater man! She was epic.
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  #17  
August 6th, 2010, 08:53 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,679
Epic doesn't really cover it I don't think.
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"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #18  
August 6th, 2010, 09:02 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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Sure it does ~ epic FAIL!
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  #19  
August 6th, 2010, 09:05 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,679
Oh well when you put it THAT way!
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"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #20  
August 6th, 2010, 09:06 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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