What keeps you going?

DreamChaser · #1 November 15th, 2005, 01:20 PM

I am sure you've all been there - you just have a day you want to throw in the towel. I'll admit I have them too, but I have always picked myself help and continued on, but today I am finding it harder - CD 50, probably haven't O'd yet and wondering if I ever will again. We've been trying for 7 or 8 cycles now and I know many of you have been trying longer - so what keeps you going - what picks you back up when you are feeling down about TTCing.

(I think I know most of you from the TTC board, but for those who don't know me, my name is Donna and I am 37 years old. I have longer than normal cycles - usually around 43 to 45 days, but this cycle is the longest I have had).

iamkc · #2 November 15th, 2005, 01:30 PM

Hey, Donna.

Your consistently long cycles would be enough to drive anyone into despair. I just wanted to say one more time that I think that YOU offer a lot of us strength and lend to our determination because you stay positive and always offer us words of wisdom and support.

That said, I don't know what keeps me going sometimes. Probably seeing babies, having dreams about them, just imagining getting to hold one. I have to pass the hospital every single day a few times and can see the trail by it from our house, so I'm always reminded...I tend to imagine the labor and delivery part a lot, or holding my baby right after. Maybe it's the POTENTIAL that keeps me going. As for the TTC part, DH has learned more and more about the process, so I feel less like it's ALL my responsibility. THAT has helped SO much! Still, each time AF hits, I feel like I've failed. I know the statistics, and those don't help. I don't fit in with those anymore. JM has helped ENORMOUSLY. I hate that other women have to go through the pain of not conceiving every month, but knowing that I'm not alone, especially when everyone else seems to get pregnant so easily and all around me...well, this has been a lifesaver.

I guess the short answer is: a little bit of everything. I always think, "THAT'S IT!!! NO MORE!!! I CANNOT HANDLE ANOTHER SECOND OF THIS!!!" But something happens involving babies and I just can't help myself. I know that if I ever do get pregnant and carry to term, hold my baby, have him/her look at me, ALL of it, that it will be worth every single second of pain and agony over TTC.

I know that this probably doesn't help you much...sorry. Just thought I'd share my two cents.

Katlynsmommy · #3 November 15th, 2005, 01:44 PM

Well seeing as i should have given up weeks ago b/c of my long long long cycle(july 16th last one) i havent but what keeps me going is seeing everyone here who has a success story and a positive attitude towards ttc.I am waiting for a dr call so i can go get checked out.so hopefully something happens soon.

Owl · #4 November 15th, 2005, 02:10 PM

Donna-I am sorry about this extra long cylce! It really sucks!

I keep going because, what else am I going to do? Sometimes I get really mad, want to quit, decide I won't try any more...but I have to. It's the thoughts of holding my own baby, having a toddler who calls me "mommy", and a child playing in the back yard...those are the things I have to keep trying for.

I really hope things look up for you soon. If you haven't O'd, I hope you do VERY soon and that your BFP is only days away.

barrycarrot · #5 November 17th, 2005, 08:21 AM

I'm having "one of those days" today. But i will keep trying simply becuase my life would not be complete without children in it. Even if i have to adopt or whatever, being a Mother is the most important thing to me in the life!

Cali*Luvin · #6 November 17th, 2005, 09:42 AM

I have those days that i want to give up ttcing, but the girls on here have kept me thru it and kept me sane, dh and i have been tccing for 16 months, so my patience is running low. But we want a child so much.

mommie2be1966 · #7 November 18th, 2005, 06:38 AM

"It ain't over till the fat lady sings"

Isn't that the saying? Well, I haven't started singing YET!

This is cycle - gosh - 13 - make that 14 (AF found me today) and for some reason, I'm just a sucker for punishment I guess. I'm cautiously optimistic about my gyne appointment on Thursday, when we get my test results and DH's SA results. Perhaps we'll get an answer as to WHY after this many cycles we haven't gotten our BFP. I keep holding out hope that it will happen, and soon, as I just turned 39 and I fear that this is my body's way of telling me it's not going to happen.

Good luck and tons of baby dust to everyone!

Maddi_Megs_mom · #8 November 18th, 2005, 05:57 PM

Sweetie!

I am 37 and Dh and I have been trying 2 years in Dec I got my BFP+++ today it can and will happen if it is possible! It has been a LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGG road for me and my dh I actually cant believe that we are still together after all the meds and the heartaches...I have gotten to actually see my DH sob and even cry "real" tears because my heart was broken so many times!
Girl I am on CD30 and I was determined that I was NOT going to test because I could not bare see another BFN.
I tested anyway and I got that BFP I have been dreaming of for the last two years!
Keep the faith is the best advice I can give to ALL trying!

Dawn

tapntammy · #9 November 19th, 2005, 03:56 PM

I can totally relate to those of you with long cycles. Mine are anywhere from 40 to 50 days. I went three months without a period recently and had to take medicine to jumpstart my cycles again. I'm currently in the 2ww. I love this board and it is what helps keep me going. It's nice to know there are others who are having the same problem as me and have had trouble conceiving. The success stories also give me hope that it will eventually happen. Thanks to all of you!
Tammy

Bellabee's Mommy · #10 November 19th, 2005, 08:20 PM

I am another one hindered with a super long cylce.

I am an CD - 43 today, with no idea when or if there is an end in sight. Whenever I get down, I just come on here and read what is going on with everyone else. I don't post a lot, but I lurk all the time! I have to say the kind words and support that everyone shows everyone is such a blessings. Thanks everyone!

bookwormmommy · #11 November 21st, 2005, 02:32 PM

OK this is going to sound terrible but what keeps me going is just resignedness. I am resigned to bfns now. So why stop trying? It won't surprise me anymore if I am not pregnant. The other, more positive thing is that I don't really believe its impossible. I figure, if I can't just "fall pregnant" then I will temp. If that doesn't work, I will try drugs. If that doesn't work there is IUI, then in vitro, then surrogacy, then adoption. I guess my point is that there is always a next step so giving up would seem foolish. After all, this could be the month. Every month could be. So I hope that your cycle ends soon one way or another. KNow that we are all pulling for you and we all get into those funks sometimes. We just keep going becaus it is what we do.

newlyweds_ttc · #12 February 27th, 2007, 08:03 PM

Hey I am in a similar situation. I have a 52 day cycle sometimes longer. I am going crazy waiting for my turn to conceive. On valentines day my doctor gave me provera to force my cycle to be 28 days. So we'll see i am on pill 6 of 10. Still no period.