[iamkc]

Way too many entertaining holiday stuff out there...here's my letter to Santa. I included the link at the end.

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Kari's Office party. It was Anders who spiked the punch with too much very dirty martini. I can't help it if I drank 38 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like spooge.

I thought it was funny when I put Eric's scarf on my head and danced the foxtrot on the credenza while singing `Gold Digger'. I didn't mean to break Kari's laptop and don't know why Kari would accuse me of indecent exposure.

I don't remember calling Brad's wife a pudgy llama---even though she looked like one with orange eye shadow and puce lipstick!

And when I threw up on Amy's husband's neck, it was only because I ate too much of that chicken and dumplins.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my little red wagon through my neighbor's sun porch. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a gassy possum and have me arrested for public urination!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all smelly and horny. And I'm really not to blame for any of this brilliant stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and surreptitiously yours,
Jessica (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 2 bucks!


You can write your own letter here!!!

[DreamChaser]

LOL - here's mine:

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Susie's Office party. It was Jolene who spiked the punch with too much Margarita. I can't help it if I drank 13 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like vanilla.

I thought it was funny when I put Bea's shirt on my head and danced the Funky Chicken on the table while singing `Love Hurts'. I didn't mean to break Susie's Palm Pilot and don't know why Susie would accuse me of robbery.

I don't remember calling Ryan's wife a small cow---even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Rose's husband's arm, it was only because I ate too much of that tacos.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my jeep through my neighbor's roof. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a large bear and have me arrested for stalking!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all tiny and fuzzy. And I'm really not to blame for any of this cold stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and good yours,
Donna (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 7 bucks!

[Titin]

LOL...I needed the laughs!
Heres mine!

Santa Clause
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Boo's Office party. It was Tami who spiked the punch with too much Ameretto Sour. I can't help it if I drank 7 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like apple cinnamon.

I thought it was funny when I put Angie's Undies on my head and danced the Chicken Dance on the Bed while singing `Luxurious'. I didn't mean to break Boo's screw driver and don't know why Boo would accuse me of stealing.

I don't remember calling John's wife a happy pig---even though she looked like one with yellow eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Ben's husband's ear, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my suv through my neighbor's chimney. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a talkitive Llama and have me arrested for prostituting!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all wild and kind. And I'm really not to blame for any of this flirty stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and clumsy yours,
Kristin (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 17 bucks!