[snsgirl336]

Who is currently TTC without Medical Assistance here??? I wonder only because I'm starting to get frustrated with my DH cause he won't even entertain the idea of testing and MA until January 2009. He is convinced it's just bad timing for us. He says we can't really count the cycles where he was coaching Lacrosse (March through June) cause we didn't have a chance. The reality is, we had better timed BDing during a lot of those months.

When I saw my Dr in June for my annual exam (also the 1 year mark of ttc), we all talked about the testing process and at the time decided that we would wait until we hit the 18month mark of trying. I was fine with it then apparently, but now, my little impatient self is starting to get the best of me. All along we've tried the keep as stress free as possible about all of this in the hopes that it would help.

Sorry for the rambling, I honestly didn't mean to! LOL... So, is there anyone out there beside me who isn't on any medical assistance yet? I feel left out!!! Not that I want there to be anything wrong, or to get all those lovely side effect you ladies talk about! LOL

[drewbears]

I am technically TTC with out assistance right now. But i have needed clomid in the past.

I saw my doc back in September? Or was it august?? to find that I have cysts and a lump in my one tata that isn't going away. I am to go for another U/S to check the cyst in nov and see my OBGYN about TTC then. We will be at the 1 year mark.

[Jessica C]

I'm sorry you're feeling left out, Cris! I was MA free until this cycle, started Clomid and if that doesn't work we are "supposed" to do Clomid/IUI next cycle. Seriously, I'm sorry DH seems reluctant. If you've really had good timing (I haven't looked at your chart for awhile and can't remember if you post BDing) you should make sure you let him know that. Also, let him know how long you've been trying and take the LaCrosse months out of the equation so he can get a "real sense" of the length of time even tho your timing was good then (I did that when DH was really sick a couple of months and our doc said to give it 6 so we actually gave it 8). I'm surprised your doctor said to wait 18 months, usually it's a year isn't it? And, I thought you were past the year mark - with or without the LaCrosse months. Good Luck and I hope you can get him at least interested in moving forward. NOT that I want you to have to go thru any sort of MA! I just want you to be able to move forward to a very well deserved BFP!

[Clare]

Your not the only one Cris. I did have blood tests done before the summer but our doctors are so incompetent that they only let you know if there is a problem. They didn't get back to me so im guessing everything is ok - its hard for me to get an appointment to chat to them about it due to my work commitments. Dh was supposed to go for a SA but keeps conveniently forgetting.

I honestly think that our problem is timing. I also dont think the stress of TTC is helping either as its all about timing now and to be honest - its not fun anymore.

[snsgirl336]

I am technically TTC with out assistance right now. But i have needed clomid in the past.

I saw my doc back in September? Or was it august?? to find that I have cysts and a lump in my one tata that isn't going away. I am to go for another U/S to check the cyst in nov and see my OBGYN about TTC then. We will be at the 1 year mark.[/b]

Oh, I hope everything turns out alright with your cysts. Hopefully if you need the clomid to get this baby, you won't have to wait too long to get it!

I'm sorry you're feeling left out, Cris! I was MA free until this cycle, started Clomid and if that doesn't work we are "supposed" to do Clomid/IUI next cycle. Seriously, I'm sorry DH seems reluctant. If you've really had good timing (I haven't looked at your chart for awhile and can't remember if you post BDing) you should make sure you let him know that. Also, let him know how long you've been trying and take the LaCrosse months out of the equation so he can get a "real sense" of the length of time even tho your timing was good then (I did that when DH was really sick a couple of months and our doc said to give it 6 so we actually gave it 8). I'm surprised your doctor said to wait 18 months, usually it's a year isn't it? And, I thought you were past the year mark - with or without the LaCrosse months. Good Luck and I hope you can get him at least interested in moving forward. NOT that I want you to have to go thru any sort of MA! I just want you to be able to move forward to a very well deserved BFP![/b]

Thanks Jessica! I usually don't post my BDing on my Chart (DH gets weirded out by people knowing when we BD ). With Lax season, we're in month 15, cycle 15. If I take out the Lacrosse season, we've had 12 months (13 cycles), so if you ask me, that's plenty to get the ball rolling! My Dr says that he likes to give "younger, healthy couples" a year and a half to ttc on their own. He seems to know what he's talking about since he said he has more couples come in between 1year ttc and 18 months ttc who end up pregnant on their own. He did say that if we were really ready for testing and such before the 18 month mark, he'd be happy to help us.

I guess we'll see what happens in the next few days... (hopefully a BFP) and I'll approach the topic again with DH. Maybe I'll buy him a new XBox game as a reward if he agrees to seeing the Dr! LOL... sometimes I have to bribe him like a small child! LOL

Your not the only one Cris. I did have blood tests done before the summer but our doctors are so incompetent that they only let you know if there is a problem. They didn't get back to me so im guessing everything is ok - its hard for me to get an appointment to chat to them about it due to my work commitments. Dh was supposed to go for a SA but keeps conveniently forgetting.

I honestly think that our problem is timing. I also dont think the stress of TTC is helping either as its all about timing now and to be honest - its not fun anymore.[/b]

I'm sorry you're having a rough time getting answers Clare! Hopefully they didn't have to contact you because everything is good with the tests. I hope that you can get your DH to "Remember" to get the SA, so you can at least get some answers from that. I know what you mean about TTC not being fun sometimes. I feel like that too sometimes!

[richmond_girl]

Cris - I don't think you are the only one; I think those of us who post just tend to be naturally more proactive and impatient about getting MA, so there's a "self-selection" bias going on here (sorry, I'm a dork, I know). Anyhow, if you're worried about it, it may be worth nudging DH a bit and starting the process. If he doesn't want to do the SA, then there's plenty of things that you can do without him to rule out issues - Day 3 bloodwork, Day 24 blood work, HSGs, etc. By the time you get through all those, it'll be January 2009 and he'll have no choice but to do the SA then

As for us, we tried really hard just to relax and spend the full 12-18 months TTC naturally before we sought out MA. We were 29 when we started so we fell into that "try for 18 months" population. After 6 months though, I just felt that something was "off" and I went to my OBGYN to get her thoughts. We decided not to do "full" infertility testing right away but we did pursue some of the simple tests just to rule out hormone issues and mainly to give me peace of mind. The SA was literally an afterthought that happened this month - we were going into month 11 of TTC and we figured it couldn't hurt to rule out MFI the same way we ruled out any issues on my end (my exact thought process was as follows: the SA only takes a few minutes, it's arguably less painful than any test I had to go through, and it's relatively cheap even if insurance doesn't cover it). Well, boy am I glad we made that decision because it turns out DH has zero sperm, and we would have never known about it had we waited to do the tests. I am already kicking myself for not getting DH tested earlier, but I'm thankful we did it when we did - otherwise, we would have wasted another 6+ months TTC naturally before seeking a specialist's help.

Before we started getting tested, we would come up with a bunch of reasons too why certain months shouldn't "count" toward our TTC efforts as well -- such as I o'd on days we were traveling, we used Astroglide, we didn't time BD perfectly, etc. I think we just really wanted to avoid MA because we were worried it would be counter-productive if in fact we were perfectly healthy and all this was just a matter of poor timing. In retrospect, I regret rationalizing why it was taking us so long to TTC, although of course we ended up falling into the 15% of the population who actually does have fertility issues.

I am sure nothing is wrong with you and DH... but I will say there's little harm that can come from simple testing - either you will be declared free and clear of issues and can keep BDing happily knowing that you are definitely fertile, or you will find out that there are some things you need to deal with and have the benefit of time on your side to do so adequately. Just my two cents. I also just turned 30 so I've got that loud ole biological clock ticking inside my head... LOL

Good luck!!
Juli

[SavaAngel]

I have to bribe my DH sometimes too. I went in at the end of August to see my doctor. I had spotting before AF would actually start and it was increasingly getting more and more days of spotting. Almost exactly 2 weeks of having to wear SOMETHING was driving me (and DH cause we didn't get much BD time because of it) crazy! So I went in for that and we were going to be starting our 9th month if AF showed (which she did). The doctor put me on the clomid hoping it would help me O better and help my body produce everything I needed to sustain the pregnancy. Sept was our first MA month, but was a bust cause I was sick (with an ER trip). And one day of spotting compared to the 6 days from the previous cycle. This is our first REAL month with MA. If this doesn't work, I go back to him and I do an ultrasound the week after my clomid (that he has to send another script for).

Push it if you feel it is necessary Cris!

[snsgirl336]

Cris - I don't think you are the only one; I think those of us who post just tend to be naturally more proactive and impatient about getting MA, so there's a "self-selection" bias going on here (sorry, I'm a dork, I know). Anyhow, if you're worried about it, it may be worth nudging DH a bit and starting the process. If he doesn't want to do the SA, then there's plenty of things that you can do without him to rule out issues - Day 3 bloodwork, Day 24 blood work, HSGs, etc. By the time you get through all those, it'll be January 2009 and he'll have no choice but to do the SA then

As for us, we tried really hard just to relax and spend the full 12-18 months TTC naturally before we sought out MA. We were 29 when we started so we fell into that "try for 18 months" population. After 6 months though, I just felt that something was "off" and I went to my OBGYN to get her thoughts. We decided not to do "full" infertility testing right away but we did pursue some of the simple tests just to rule out hormone issues and mainly to give me peace of mind. The SA was literally an afterthought that happened this month - we were going into month 11 of TTC and we figured it couldn't hurt to rule out MFI the same way we ruled out any issues on my end (my exact thought process was as follows: the SA only takes a few minutes, it's arguably less painful than any test I had to go through, and it's relatively cheap even if insurance doesn't cover it). Well, boy am I glad we made that decision because it turns out DH has zero sperm, and we would have never known about it had we waited to do the tests. I am already kicking myself for not getting DH tested earlier, but I'm thankful we did it when we did - otherwise, we would have wasted another 6+ months TTC naturally before seeking a specialist's help.

Before we started getting tested, we would come up with a bunch of reasons too why certain months shouldn't "count" toward our TTC efforts as well -- such as I o'd on days we were traveling, we used Astroglide, we didn't time BD perfectly, etc. I think we just really wanted to avoid MA because we were worried it would be counter-productive if in fact we were perfectly healthy and all this was just a matter of poor timing. In retrospect, I regret rationalizing why it was taking us so long to TTC, although of course we ended up falling into the 15% of the population who actually does have fertility issues.

I am sure nothing is wrong with you and DH... but I will say there's little harm that can come from simple testing - either you will be declared free and clear of issues and can keep BDing happily knowing that you are definitely fertile, or you will find out that there are some things you need to deal with and have the benefit of time on your side to do so adequately. Just my two cents. I also just turned 30 so I've got that loud ole biological clock ticking inside my head... LOL

Good luck!!
Juli[/b]

Wow Juli! Thank you for your reply! That's a lot of great info! I'm 28 years old right now (will be 29 in March) and DH just turned 33. I think that the age thing is always in the back of my mind, though I still consider us all young! You make a lot of great points... by the time things really do get rolling it will turn out to be January. I am worried that we've wasted a lot of time, but I'm putting my faith in the fact that there is something to it when DH says it'll happen when it's the right time for us. The word impatient doesn't even begin to describe me! I just think we need a little boost (either with MA, or the knowledge that we are both ok and just need to wait a bit longer to get it). I'm really appreciative of your reply. In fact, I am probably going to show this to my DH and hopefully it'll knock some sense into him!

I have to bribe my DH sometimes too. I went in at the end of August to see my doctor. I had spotting before AF would actually start and it was increasingly getting more and more days of spotting. Almost exactly 2 weeks of having to wear SOMETHING was driving me (and DH cause we didn't get much BD time because of it) crazy! So I went in for that and we were going to be starting our 9th month if AF showed (which she did). The doctor put me on the clomid hoping it would help me O better and help my body produce everything I needed to sustain the pregnancy. Sept was our first MA month, but was a bust cause I was sick (with an ER trip). And one day of spotting compared to the 6 days from the previous cycle. This is our first REAL month with MA. If this doesn't work, I go back to him and I do an ultrasound the week after my clomid (that he has to send another script for).

Push it if you feel it is necessary Cris![/b]

Whew! I'm glad I'm not the only one who has to bribe their DH! I hope that this will be the one and only time you'll need to do the clomid thing. I'm thinking that with all of this info, facts and figures as well as bribery, my poor DH won't stand a chance!

Honestly, I want to thank all of you who have replied and shared your stories and opinions and advice. It means a lot that you took the time to help me out! I'm feeling a bit better now about talking to DH and I have you all to thank for it!

[SavaAngel]

That's what we are here for Cris!

[spanisheyes06]

heyy. we are ttc w/o ma. its been quite a while, but my dr did test me to make sure i didnt have a thyroid prob but thats about it. im 20 and my dh is 21. we never thought it would be this hard but we are not to the point that we wanna have ma because there are so many other factors why we havent been successful yet. i hope that it doesnt get to that point for myself or for anyone else on here that hasnt started. i hope for all of us it just takes a little bit of taking our minds off of the baby making and that will be enough to let it happen. ive heard someone say that after a while bd becomes a ritual, and not what it really should be. that you should focus on actually making love with your partner and all of that love that is invested will result in a pregnancy!! good luck everybody!

[snsgirl336]

That's what we are here for Cris![/b]

And that's why I you guys are the greatest!

heyy. we are ttc w/o ma. its been quite a while, but my dr did test me to make sure i didnt have a thyroid prob but thats about it. im 20 and my dh is 21. we never thought it would be this hard but we are not to the point that we wanna have ma because there are so many other factors why we havent been successful yet. i hope that it doesnt get to that point for myself or for anyone else on here that hasnt started. i hope for all of us it just takes a little bit of taking our minds off of the baby making and that will be enough to let it happen. ive heard someone say that after a while bd becomes a ritual, and not what it really should be. that you should focus on actually making love with your partner and all of that love that is invested will result in a pregnancy!! good luck everybody! [/b]

I can understand what you're saying about the BDing becoming routine. My DH and I always said that once the BDing isn't fun, we needed to take a break. Fortunately for us, we find lots of ways to keep things fresh and exciting in that department! LOL. I hope that you'll be able to get that BFP soon without MA!!! Good luck!

[richmond_girl]

I'm sure whatever you and DH decide is the right choice for you!! Good luck and I sure you don't need MA - there are enough of us getting it that you can live vicariously through us.

[dng]

We only started MA due to the awesome insurance we had at the time. We were about to lose the insurance.

[snsgirl336]

I'm sure whatever you and DH decide is the right choice for you!! Good luck and I sure you don't need MA - there are enough of us getting it that you can live vicariously through us. [/b]

Thanks again Juli! I hope you're right that we won't need any MA.... I wish that you all didn't need it either! That's definitely not something I think any of you should have to deal with! I just wish this was easier for us all!!! I just keep telling myself how much I will appreciate and love my baby that much more once I have it after waiting for it for so long!

We only started MA due to the awesome insurance we had at the time. We were about to lose the insurance.[/b]

You're smart to have don't that Diane! We have pretty good insurance now through DH and just yesterday he comes up with, "maybe I should get a new job..." And lost our great insurance for who knows what? All the more reason to push him to start the testing stuff!

We have an hour long car ride to his parents tomorrow for dinner, so I'm gonna broach the topic again and feel him out about it all! Wish me luck girls!!!

[Hopingfor1soon]

Sorry I didnt see this sooner hun!! Anyways, you arent the only not getting MA!!! You know all about my MA stuff so I wont go into details there, but I will say that we are more than likely going to be on a MA break for a while...not my choice...definitely DHs choice.

So if you end up not getting MA I am so here to talk....and if you do I think thats great, and I will share all my experience with you if you want! haha

So either way I am here for you!

[snsgirl336]

Sorry I didnt see this sooner hun!! Anyways, you arent the only not getting MA!!! You know all about my MA stuff so I wont go into details there, but I will say that we are more than likely going to be on a MA break for a while...not my choice...definitely DHs choice.

So if you end up not getting MA I am so here to talk....and if you do I think thats great, and I will share all my experience with you if you want! haha

So either way I am here for you! [/b]

Aww, Thank you so much Alicia! I am so sad that you might be taking a MA break. You guys were on such a positive roll, but I'm pretty sure I know the reasons why you might take a break, and I can understand how you'd be frustrated.

I appreciate your offer of sharing your knowledge! I'm sure I"ll be leaning on you and everyone else here either way!