[tchelle]

I've been on JM for a while but since I'm on cycle #8, I figured I might as well hop in here.

My BF (32) and I (29) have been dating for almost 1 1/2 years and have been living together for 1 year & 7 days (lol. Our 1 year aniv. for moving in was Aug 25th). Although we're not officially engaged, we have talked and we both know we're going to be getting married, I just don't have a ring or formal proposal . . . yet.

I went off birth control back in January partly because it was making me seriously bi-polar/depressed (I was actually on Xanax for a while because I had such bad anxiety and at the time we didn't realize it was because of the birth control) and partly because we really want to have kids.

A little history:

About 6 or 7 years ago, BF was dating a girl (we will refer to her as "Stupid"). He and Stupid were on the verge of breaking up when she announced she was pregnant. BF had a neglectful, alcoholic father (he's been sober for 20 years now, though) so more than anything he wanted to be a dad partly because he knew he could be a better dad than his father was and partly because he absolutely adores kids and is fantastic with them. So even though they were breaking up, he was still absolutely extatic that she was pregnant.

Stupid ended up having a little baby girl named Isabelle . BF got Isabelle on the weekends and spoiled her and loved her like crazy. Then when Isabelle was 9 months old, one of BF's friends tells him he may want to get a paternity test doen because Stupid had been cheating on him before they broke up.

They get the paternity test done and BF is absolutely devistated to learn that he isn't Isabelle's father. Stupid didn't really even want her and he would have loved to keep her anyway, but because he wasn't the father, there was nothing he could do and she was ripped from his life. He became very depressed and actually wanted to kill himself but couldn't do it outright because he was raised Catholic and it would destroy his mother. So instead, he let his life spiral out of control and put himself in situations where he hoped he would get killed (ie drinking, drugs, etc).

He ended up getting several DUI's and got a felony conviction. While he was serving his 120 days, he realized that he needed to turn his life around so he moved out here where his oldest & youngest brother lived (7 of his 10 nieces & nephews are out here too and he wanted to be a bigger part of their lives). He got a job at a local factory, became friends with a good friend of mine and she hooked us up.

So more than anything, I want to get pregnant and be able to tell him "This baby is absolutely yours." But that's proving more difficult than we first thought. Both of us are to the point where we're really thinking one of us might have some fertility issues. I've been laid off since Feb (I'm sure the stress of that hasn't helped but I have a promising interview tomorrow, though) so I don't have insurance and money is kind of tight and I know most fertility doctors want you to wait a year anyway (but I really feel the clock ticking because we're not all that young any more).

Okay, that was kind of long, but that's our story.

(If I do manage to get pregnant this cycle - not getting my hopes up, though - my due date would actually be a few days before Isabelle's birthday.)

[~*Jackie*~]

Welcome to the group! What an amazing story- I'm so sorry for everything that your BF has been through, but it sounds like he is turning his life around and is very lucky to have you by his side. I hope that you get that BFP soon, and I look forward to getting to know you while you are ttc!

I'm Jackie (28 in a month!), DH is Jon (29), and we're going to be moving into month 22 of ttc. I have been diagnosed with severe endometriosis and had surgery last cycle- so this is the first cycle post-op.

[MommaLee]

Wow, that is quite a story! Best of luck to you...
BTW, I'm Lee Ann!

[~Lynda~]

hi there, thanks for sharing your story!!! i can see how you would love to tell your DB that he is truly going to be a father!!! I am so sorry it is taking you longer to have that dream!!! I know alot about it taking longer than you planned!!! welcome to our group. the ladies here are great!!!! i hope you get your bfp this cycle!!!

[Soape]

THat is quite a story!! I hope that your journey will be a short one from this point on.

Welcome to the group.
I'm Amanda (28) and DH is Michael (26). We have been married for a little over 3 years. We have been trying off and on since December 2006, with two miscarriages this year.

[tchelle]

Thank you all so much for the warm welcome.

I'm really hoping I get the job that I'm interviewing for tomorrow (I already took a test for basic math/language skills and did well on it). Most places have a 90 day waiting period for benefits so hopefully I'll have some health insurance by Dec and can get some tests done (I've been charting so I at least I know I'm ovulating and have pretty regular cycles which is a pretty big hurtle). And once I get working again, money will be better and maybe we can have a SA done on BF soon and can go from there.

[snsgirl336]

Welcome to our family! I'm sorry your BF has had some struggles, but it seems like he's made some very positive strides in his life. Good for him! I hope that you don't have to stick around here too long, but it's a great group to lean on while you're here!

I'm Cris (29) married to Shawn (32) and we've been ttc our first for 2 years now. Good luck on your interview!

Hi Welcome to the group! This is a wonderfully supportive group of girls here, I know you will like it! I hope your stay is short and you get to tell BF he's gonna be a daddy very soon!

[SavaAngel]

Welcome to the family. I hope you get to tell your BF very soon that he is going to be a daddy!

I am Christina (26) married to Tony (30) and we have a 3yr old son AJ. We have been TTC #2 since January 2008.

[KDD]

I'm Kimberley and my DH is Jason. We're in the 2ww of cycle #17 of TTC after a miscarriage last year.

Good luck with your interview tomorrow!