[LindseyMarie]

I had a huge glob of brown/red CM earlier, and now am spotting, which is what happens to me the night before AF normally.

I'm devastated. I've never been so upset over AF showing and a BFN. I wanted a BFP this month so badly, and with the positive OPK got my hopes up, and with the HSG I added to that because some people have more fertility after. Neither was the case for me. I haven't told DH we're out yet, but will tell him tonight to start putting in his leave papers for work for January 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th, for my surgery.

I am so heartbroken. I have to share somewhere because this is the most down I have ever been about AF. I knew this would more than likely happen, but still.

So now, this cycle, we will be TTA for my surgery in Jan, then onto clomid and met afterwards.

Sorry to be the downer, I just could use some support right now.

[~Lynda~]

hun, we are totally here for you!!! i so know exactly how you feel right now. with each arrival of AF, my spirit dies a little more!! it's so darn hard to keep going!! especially since we can't afford medical assistance and have decided that it's in God's hands. i'm so so sorry hun!!! big big big hugs!!!

[~*Jackie*~]

I'm so sorry... I can definitely relate to how you are feeling... I had to have a lap done in August.

We're here for you to lean on!

[aogilvie]

I'm sorrryyyy!

[SavaAngel]

Big HUGS Lindsey! I am sorry you didn't get a BFP. I hope that your surgery brings you relief from you pain and you heal quickly. I hope Clomid and Metformin work for you!

Email or call me if you need to talk.

[LindseyMarie]

Thanks for all your support guys... today has been a rough day. It's a really painful AF (thanks endo...) and I'm all out of pain meds, and spent the whole day running errands. I bawled in the middle of target for the dumbest reasons ever because I am still just really upset this wasn't our month. We did everything right, even had that clear HSG, and now this.

I feel like my holidays are tainted now because I clung to the thought of a BFP before them.

[~*Jackie*~]

I'm so sorry... I'm a few days behind you, and I'm heartbroken as well. It shouldn't be this hard for us!!!!!!!

[Curly75]

I'm so truly sorry for you. I'm in similar boat as you and I know how hard it can be. I joined this message board just this week myself so I could hav a place to "talk" about it and have others understand. Hang in there! Maybe next month will be the month.