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Can't make up my mind


Forum: Trying to Conceive Six Months +

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  • 1 Post By alittlelost

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  #1  
November 23rd, 2012, 07:33 AM
BabyX's Avatar TTC #2
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Location: Texas
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Sorry if this ends up being long. I'm just trying to sort things out in my mind and feel the need to vent.

Currently I'm on cycle #14 TTC. This cycle I am just feeling weird. I keep going back and forth between really trying and just NTNP this cycle. As of today I am CD10. I haven't even really started thinking about using OPKs. I thought I was gonig to temp this cycle, but I just haven't been able to get into it. I have been taking my pregnancy prep, b vitamin, prenatal and drinking red raspberry leaf tea. That's mostly b/c these things have become mechanical for me. I also really like the tea.
I just feel like my heart isn't in it this cycle. I've watched yet another huge BFP boom take place these last several weeks and that always gets me a little down as well. It's like there are only so many spots for a BFP and when you see all of these other girls getting BFPs it's like well I guess there isn't going to be room for me again this cycle. Not that I'm not happy for all of the ladies with their BFPs. There are some ladies that have been working at this for a really long time that are very deserving of their BFPs. I am so happy for them.
Here and there I'm finding myself even thinking, "Maybe I just don't want to get pregnant now." I don't know I'm just feeling really weird this month.
Anyway I don't really know that there is a point to this post. I'm just speaking what's going through my head. I know that I'm going to want to kick myself next cycle for wasting this cycle if we just NTNP. For this cycle I'm just really feeling like I don't really feel like trying.
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  #2  
November 23rd, 2012, 07:48 AM
Still Trying for #1
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I kinda feel the same
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  #3  
November 23rd, 2012, 08:13 AM
BabyX's Avatar TTC #2
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So I guess that means that I'm not weird for having these feelings?
I'm sorry that you're feeling them as well.
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  #4  
November 23rd, 2012, 10:17 AM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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you know, I was the same way at the start of this cycle, then at the last minute started using OPKs and temping. Also, the only thing I did different this cycle was drink the raspberry tea (with my pregnancy prep). I hope you get your BFP soon! And I thought the same as you. part of me though, I need to test now while BFPs are in the air! The other part of me thought: too many BFPs. No room for me. You just never know. And of course, that's not try that there are limited BFP slots, but I understand thinking that way because I do it all the time.
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  #5  
November 23rd, 2012, 10:22 AM
BabyX's Avatar TTC #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alittlelost View Post
you know, I was the same way at the start of this cycle, then at the last minute started using OPKs and temping. Also, the only thing I did different this cycle was drink the raspberry tea (with my pregnancy prep). I hope you get your BFP soon! And I thought the same as you. part of me though, I need to test now while BFPs are in the air! The other part of me thought: too many BFPs. No room for me. You just never know. And of course, that's not try that there are limited BFP slots, but I understand thinking that way because I do it all the time.
I am so happy that you got your BFP!!!!

I know it's ridiculous to think that there are a limited number of BFPs to go around. It's just one of those weird things you think to yourself. Doesn't really make sense, but it happens.
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  #6  
November 23rd, 2012, 10:33 AM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I totally get it I hope you get your BFP soon.
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  #7  
November 23rd, 2012, 12:25 PM
FishermansWife4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Audrey...... If I could wave a magic wand I totally would. I'm still convinced science should come up with a pop up on our wrists for when we're guarenteed fertile. It'd make this process a lot easier, imho. I hope you feel better, hun cause it breaks my heart you're down. I'm going to keep on praying you get your bfp and sprinkle tons and tons of super duper sticky dust to you. Who knows? Maybe this will be *THE* cycle. Lots of surprise bfps happen when we aren't even sure it'll happen ourselves
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  #8  
November 24th, 2012, 02:00 AM
Frozenoj's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Maybe this is good! Clare got her BFP during a cycle she felt down and out. Even if you don't, we all need a break sometimes. I know before my BFP I was really feeling the need for a break. Because we are working on a deadline I just couldn't convince myself to go through with it. But then with the loss and not being able to take Clomid, I figured there was no real point trying this cycle. It went well for a few weeks until I got impatient and got back in the TTC spirit lol. I feel so refreshed now and ready to tackle things next cycle. I'm glad I took the break, even if the reason why breaks my heart.
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