[TabithaE]

So I found out my little sister is pregnant today! She isnt in a stable relationship, she doesnt want kids, she was just heading off to school. My DH and I have been trying for 9 cycles, talking about it for 2 years-he had to have a reversal-which is fine, lots of swimmers. We have a great home love eachother lots and still can't get a BFP. I want to know who I pissed off to make it so I can't just get pregnant. And if I hear "you have to stop trying, the stress will make it so you can't conceive", one more time I'm going to tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine. My own mother who knows I want this more than anything in the world told me today-everything happens for a reason. What reason, how can I make it change, what cann I do to make it so I can have a baby?????What is wrong with me?

[Gina1978]

So I found out my little sister is pregnant today! She isnt in a stable relationship, she doesnt want kids, she was just heading off to school. My DH and I have been trying for 9 cycles, talking about it for 2 years-he had to have a reversal-which is fine, lots of swimmers. We have a great home love eachother lots and still can't get a BFP. I want to know who I pissed off to make it so I can't just get pregnant. And if I hear "you have to stop trying, the stress will make it so you can't conceive", one more time I'm going to tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine. My own mother who knows I want this more than anything in the world told me today-everything happens for a reason. What reason, how can I make it change, what cann I do to make it so I can have a baby?????What is wrong with me?[/b]

Im so sorry Theres nothing worse than TTC for months on end and then finding out that someone close to you is pregnant..but its even worse when they didnt even try or want it...
Unfortunately,thats life,and all we can do is hope that we will be next.Thats why the saying "god has a plan" doesnt work for me..because I dont understand what that plan is...Why do those who dont want a baby always get pregnant first? Why do drug adicts,alcoholics and totally unworthy people always get pregnant quickly and have no complications,whilst women who are healthy,loving and totally devoted to being a mother have fertility problems?
Why do some women get pregnant on their first try,yet others go through months of stress,sadness,worry and heartache? Why are some women never able to have children? There are so many questions that I want the awnsers too,and Im tired of those "make it all better" quotes that people use to heal all situations..especially when the quote is totally contradictive (you will hear lots of them) ...I dont beleive there is a plan,your future is what you make it and you arent being punished or made to wait because of something you did .There isnt a reason for things like this (what reason could there possibly be for putting a woman through this sort of thing?),so searching for it wont do anything but stress you out and upset you.If you are worried,go to a doctor,get help,see if they can run some tests etc.
I (we all) understand you..and beleive me,you arent alone! We all wonder why things like this have to happen..how many of us break down each month because we are emotionally axsausted..what more can we do? Am I not trying hard enough? What else do I have to do? Why is this happening? etc...
All I can say is dont blame your self and dont beat your self up about it..you can make things happen
You have been TTC for 9 months now..if you consider there is a problem,see your doctor and explain your situation,get him to listen and to help you.
There is so much that can be done these days,all you have to do is get the ball rolling.Some people do sit back and go by the "everything happens for a reason" saying..but you dont have to be one of those people..you can fight for what you want and dont give up until you get it,thats your plan
Quotes and sayings are just words,and you can prove them all wrong! You will be a mommy!!!
Good luck!!!!

[TabithaE]

Thank you! I feel better today, still mad that I am not holding a baby this month, but hopefull it could still happen. My DH is so good and caring, I am very lucky. We have 2 kids from his first marriage that are with us all week, and I love that I get to be their parent/stepmom. I just hope that soon I will get to feel what it is like to see those 2 pink lines on the test. And ironically I work in a clinic so I have gone through the first tests. Everthing looks good and my MD wants me to wait till we hit the one year mark. Not going to happen.....I have been doing more research and hope to be going in for a HSG soon-if we're not pg this cycle (I'm on cycyle day 22) Any other tests/procedures I should get done. Or just go for the specialist? I live in rural Alaska so just going shopping is a challenge let alone getting in to see a Reproductive specialist. Thank you for the pep talk :-)