[sheba1972]

Well, this is my first posting. Scanning the net looking for answers and found this site. I'm glad there is a forum so I can at least unload or vent to anyone listening. You know, I have a child already who is two now - a great little boy with unfortunately a father who had a propensity to compulsively lie. So I had to get away from him - never married to him - with him for about three years altogether - with promises of marriage. That I would say points a little to the untruths. But maybe I will discuss his inadequacies (is that a word?) at a later date. Maybe when I am a little more comfortable with spilling my guts to the world. Any who, I have been married to my new wonderful husband since March. He had no other children so this would be his first child and we have been trying since Nov of last year. We have been actively trying with the ovulation predictors, charting, etc since January. No luck........well, I did have a barely detectable positive test about two months ago and was five days late but then started my period on the 4th of July. Hmmmmm. A chemical pregnacy perhaps? You know what is truely frustrating about all this is that I am a labor and delivery nurse and have been for 7 years. I see these women come in all the time who don't want children and are on drugs and don't have custody of any of their children and they are breeding like rabbits. It is truely disgusting. Some don't even come see their babies in the nursery. It is truely a sad situation. Can you say that in this posting I am a little bitter. I don't think I am - just remarking on the irony of the situation.

I am on day 23 right now. Currently breasts are tender, slight crampy to low abd. Otherwise nothing else. Hope rings eternal if this could be the inital "symptoms." But if not I have decided to go to the doc and see what we can do. I am what would be considered "advanced maternal age" at 35. My husband is 37. YOu know at this point you really feel the clock a-ticking and know your ovaries are beginning to take on a raisin like texture. They are becoming "raisinettes". I have directed my husbands swimmers to "go to the light" but they either haven't been listening or my egg is possibly jammed upstream somewhere. It's all very frustrating. My sister-in-law is ready to have her in-vitro twins anyday now (after 4 years of trying) and will most like be when I am working. So very happy for them. So anyway, it feels good to unload. See you at my next debriefing.