Log In Sign Up

I thought I'd feel better


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
December 28th, 2005, 03:43 PM
soontobemommyto3
Guest
Posts: n/a
I thought after I lost my baby last August that getting pregnant again would help. It doesn't. I still feel so empty inside. I mean I am thrilled to be pregnant again, but it doesn't take the pain away of losing my baby. I still miss her. I would have been having her very soon.

I wonder if I'll ever feel better. I know this baby deserves us to be happy and excited about his/her pregnancy and birth, but I'm so scared. It is like I am just expecting the worse so I don't get my hopes up and get hurt again.

I know I can't be alone with this.... am I?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
December 28th, 2005, 03:57 PM
iamkc's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Montana
Posts: 8,137
Send a message via AIM to iamkc
Oh, Susan, I'm so sorry. I've been thinking about you a lot lately, knowing that Cassie's due date is approaching. You're most definitely not alone. My late loss DD is coming up in January, too. In addition, I've just had so many pregnancies with no babies that I'm not even excited. Every twinge makes me cry and remember the others, think that this one is bound to join them. It's terrible. I feel so guilty. I wish DESPERATELY that I would be excited and I've tried to work myself up...but I just can't. You're right--it's not fair to these that we can't be excited, but I sincerely think that it will come. And I promise--if you get excited about this one, it doesn't mean that you think any less of Cassie's life or that any of us think that you do. She's still your baby. It might be more concerning if you didn't miss her and if you weren't worried.

I wish I could give you a real hug...I've been thinking about you SO much!
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #3  
December 28th, 2005, 07:49 PM
Ethans_Mommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Arizona!
Posts: 2,717
Susan, I feel the same as you. I havent had the chance to get excited yet, other than the initial excitment, because I am so scared of the unknown. I cant imagine losing a baby as far along as you were, but my heart goes out to you.
__________________
<div align="center">Stephanie aka "Queen of the Universe" Mommy to Ethan and Leah

<div align='center'> </div>
</div>
Reply With Quote
  #4  
December 30th, 2005, 07:33 AM
Blessings B's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 3,422
You are in my prayers<<hugs>> B
Reply With Quote
  #5  
January 1st, 2006, 09:40 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 518
(((((Susan))))) you are never alone. I have began to accept that I am no longer "normal" normal meaning, getting to have children without worrying and never having to face losing a child. You know it makes me who I am! My angels and my experiences are the colors that will paint the portrait of my life. My living family are the brightest ones and the deeper, more rich colors are for my angels and my heartbreaks. If that makes sense. lol. I don't know how to look at life anymore, I don't expect anything either. If there is one thing I have learned this past year and 1/2 it's how to live day to day without ever thinking about next week, much less next year. All I can do is pray and hope that the rest of my life has a happier outcome. And I know that you know it's so hard when you have had a living child before your loss because on one hand you are so greatful to have that blessing and love of your life but on the other hand you just can't belive that God would allow the deep pain of losing a baby. There is a very thin line there and I have crossed it many times. Only time will heal and even then that wound in your heart for ~Cassidy~ will never completley heal. She is a part of you that will never go away. A friend of mine, who's baby is burried next to my son, told me that you don't get over it you just get used to living this new way. And everyone is different so none of us will heal at the same pace of in the same way. As for our new babies on the way, I pray daily that they will be born alive and healthy and grow up with our living children. That'S all I can do and probably the most important thing to do is Trust God.[size=4]
Reply With Quote
  #6  
January 1st, 2006, 05:47 PM
Regular
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1
Quote:
I thought after I lost my baby last August that getting pregnant again would help. It doesn't. I still feel so empty inside. I mean I am thrilled to be pregnant again, but it doesn't take the pain away of losing my baby. I still miss her. I would have been having her very soon.

I wonder if I'll ever feel better. I know this baby deserves us to be happy and excited about his/her pregnancy and birth, but I'm so scared. It is like I am just expecting the worse so I don't get my hopes up and get hurt again.

I know I can't be alone with this.... am I?[/b]

Hi, I'm new here. I know how you feel... I had a miscarriage in July at almost 11 weeks and now I'm pregnant again. I'll be 12 weeks on Tuesday. Things have been going great-- I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks and I heard the heartbeat on 12/16. It's comforting, but I'm still nervous. I actually just told my sister-in-law today that I'm still not "there" in terms of being super excited. I felt awful saying that because she and her husband are TTC. I'm so happy and I want nothing more than to have this baby, but it really stinks being preoccupied with every twinge and ache. I can't stop thinking about the fact that the baby would have been born in 4 weeks. My original DD for this pregnancy was on the date of my miscarriage (weird, huh?) but now they think I'll be due a couple days later. I hope we all get through these pregnancies and have beautiful babies!!!


Reply With Quote
  #7  
January 2nd, 2006, 01:46 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: TX
Posts: 4,096
Send a message via MSN to babybluegirl
im sorry you are going through this i too lost a baby in sep i told my husband that i dont
know if i could go through with another pregnancy well we got af in oct and concieved and in early nov found out i still get sad about our angel that passed but am greatful to be given the chance to
carry this baby though at the begining we told no one incase something happened i too get scared with
every pain pull i get but pray to God that everything will be ok dont get me wrong i was crying and didnt know who to blame and just started to pray and asked the Lord to make me strong to accept his will and not
to question it... it still think about my angel but i know he is with God ........................
__________________
<div align="center">

http://carolinas-sweets.blogspot.com/</div>
Reply With Quote
  #8  
January 2nd, 2006, 01:51 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 935
I am so sorry you're feeling this way, but don't worry...I believe it's completely normal. There's no innocence to pregnancy after you've lost a baby. It's so natural to worry about the same thing happening. After my first m/c, I didn't let myself get attached to my 2nd baby at all, and I did end up losing it as well. But this time I FORCED myself to fall in love with this baby like my heart desired to and by 12-13 weeks I felt much better about things. I guess I just realized how important it is to treasure every moment with these little miracles.
__________________
<div align="center">
Waiting for #2!
</div>
Reply With Quote
  #9  
January 9th, 2006, 11:57 AM
hopin4a4rth
Guest
Posts: n/a
Yes! I felt the same way. I'm starting to feel a bit better as this pregnancy progresses.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:03 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0