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My Bittersweet Friday.


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
October 4th, 2008, 09:21 PM
ChattyAshley's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Yesterday was a very interesting day emotionally for me. I woke up, got dressed for work, and everything was relatively normal until I got in the car and started driving. I was about halfway there when that song from TARZAN came on the radio, "You'll Be In My Heart." I started crying as I remembered that it was October 3. If I hadn't miscarried last spring, October 3 would have been my due date.

I got to school and my wonderful coworker Trudy consoled me and reminded me that it was completely normal to feel sad about my loss. I guess I was kind of feeling guilty since I've got this healthy, overly-athletic baby bouncing inside me now and I felt like there shouldn't be room to be sad, but it was nice to hear from somebody that no matter what, you never really get over the pain that comes from losing a child at any stage of life.

So, school starts. I've pulled myself together and I'm ready for a very average Friday. I realize something is very odd in my classroom. My students are acting very strange, even for them! What is going on here??? I know that something fishy is going on.

I get called down to the office around 9:10. When I get back to my room at 9:15, it's covered in streamers and balloons. Cookies & soda line our reading table. There's a banner on the wall that says "It's a Boy!"

No freaking way... my class threw me a BABY SHOWER!! HA!!!!

My kids were so dang cute. About 8 kids had brought presents which I anxiously tore open as they watched. Blankets, teddy bears, baby lotions... I was ecstatic! It was exactly what I needed exactly when I needed it.

And thus the emotional rollercoaster of a pregnant 6th grade teacher continues...





******UPDATE**********
I finally got my camera home so I could take a pic of the presents my students got me for my "Surprise Class Baby Shower". Some cute outfits, a couple blankets, even a teething ring!! ADORABLE!!!! My kids are the coolest!




OMG!!! I just barely noticed the funniest thing ever!!!!! See that big green thing at the bottom of the pic?? Can you guess what that is???
IT'S MY BELLY!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Always in the way!!!!
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  #2  
October 4th, 2008, 09:40 PM
jademyst13's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I know how it feels to be happily pregnant once your angel's EDD comes around and having to deal with the sadness. I have been missing my angel alot lately and I too keep thinking that it must be weird.

I think that was so very sweet of you students!! I bet Baby Taco had a hand in the decided upon day knowing that it would be just what you would need.
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  #3  
October 5th, 2008, 02:42 AM
*Pamela*
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Sad tears for your loss hun. It's such a hard time. Just because you have one heck of kicker in there doesn't make it any easier. The baby you loss was so special and so wanted and that never goes away.

Happy tears for your school shower surprise!!! That was so sweet. What year do you tech?
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  #4  
October 5th, 2008, 06:54 AM
princesskate's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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hun

It was lovely of your class to throw you a baby shower
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  #5  
October 5th, 2008, 08:28 AM
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awww that got me all teary. I also think baby taco had alot to do with the planning of that day! the song, the shower, everything!!! and yes, I was prego on my EDD and was still very sad, cried and everything, its normal, we will always miss them no matter how many more healthy babies we have.
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  #6  
October 5th, 2008, 09:58 AM
angelmomjen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I am so sorry for your loss, and I think that even when you hold your overly athletic baby in your arms you will always remember your angel, they are both your babies, and you love them both,

Your class is wonderful and that was so sweet!! I needed some sappy tears this morning, and girl that hit the spot!!
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  #7  
October 5th, 2008, 10:38 AM
woohoo502's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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How sweet of your class! I agree, Baby Taco had a lot to do with that day for you.
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  #8  
October 5th, 2008, 06:36 PM
ChattyAshley's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thanks ladies, I'm sure that Baby Taco had something to do with it. It's just too big of a coincidence that the kids planned it for that day!
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  #9  
October 6th, 2008, 05:49 AM
mom 2 haley & tyler's Avatar formerly mommy2haley17
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That made me teary even Ashley! It's perfectly normal to miss baby Taco. That was so sweet of your class to throw you a baby shower and exactly on the day you needed it. That melted my heart. What lil sweeties you have there.
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  #10  
October 6th, 2008, 08:21 AM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That's so sweet of you kids to do that, it almost made me cry (I have to watch out I'm at work ).
I think it's prefectly normal to miss your angel, mine would be a month old by now and latley I'm starting to think more about him/her because of things that we are doing, that we wouln't do with my angel was here, or the fact that I would probably go home this christmas with a baby, it makes me sad to think about it but I'm happy to have this little boy inside me kicking away.

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  #11  
October 6th, 2008, 11:45 AM
Wee3monkeys's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Awww, Ashley, that was so sweet of your class!!! I agree that your angel had to have had something to do with that; they picked an amazing day to lift you up!

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  #12  
October 6th, 2008, 12:00 PM
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Quote:
I agree that your angel had to have had something to do with that; they picked an amazing day to lift you up![/b]
I totally agree. That was really sweet of them.

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  #13  
October 6th, 2008, 02:30 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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Oh wow, I'm sorry I missed this!

First off, yes, you are allowed to still be sad about the baby you don't have. It doesn't matter if you have a million more children, none of them will ever replace Baby Taco. You've got the added difficulty of the "if I didn't lose that one, I wouldn't have this one." It's normal to be confused about how to feel in that instance. And missing Baby Taco doesn't make you any less grateful or happy you're having Milkshake. Ever. Missing them means that you loved them and love them still profoundly.


And how sweet of your class to do that for you!! That's awesome. I'm glad that they were able to make that day a bit better for you. AND, like the others said, I'm sure that Baby Taco was there with you, celebrating every moment too.
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  #14  
October 6th, 2008, 03:03 PM
kalis's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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i am so glad your class threw you a shower on that day - what a special time for that to happen. someone was looking out for you. i think Baby Taco wanted to make sure you and Baby Milkshake were okay.
that was really nice of your co-worker to be so supportive too.
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  #15  
October 6th, 2008, 04:50 PM
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EDDs are hard days, but how sweet of your class to throw you a shower! How awesome of them!
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  #16  
October 7th, 2008, 07:29 PM
ChattyAshley's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have to bump this up so you can see the update and pic (and my huge green belly in the way!)
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  #17  
October 7th, 2008, 08:32 PM
ShannonMVT's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I know Baby Taco will always have a special place in your heart and it's okay to miss him/her.

How exciting about the baby shower...that was so nice of them! How old are the kids in your class? They got you cute things too!

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  #18  
October 7th, 2008, 11:47 PM
..Jessica..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That's so incredibly sweet of them to do! Especially with them not knowing what October 3rd means to you.
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  #19  
October 8th, 2008, 03:09 AM
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Quote:
Awww, Ashley, that was so sweet of your class!!! I agree that your angel had to have had something to do with that; they picked an amazing day to lift you up!

[/b]
I totally agree! And WOW for your students to be sooo thoughtful in todays day and age.
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  #20  
October 8th, 2008, 04:13 AM
princesskate's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Awww the gifts you got are gorgeous
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