Log In Sign Up

bittersweet...


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
January 13th, 2006, 04:06 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Hi girls, I've been thinking about something since it happened...well Wed I had my dr's appt...I just love my dr. When she walked in she hugged me. Again reiterated my levels are looking good...she told me how to wean off the Prozac (1 every other day for 2 weeks, then 1 every 3rd day for 2 weeks, and so forth), she gave me blood work orders to get my hcg checked every 4 days until I come back to see her. She scheduled my u/s for 1/25. She told me not inserting anything into me....says she wants to make sure the baby implants with no disruption. So hence why no sex. We discussed Nathanael a bit his health and his weirdness...she was so supportive! She told me she was going to speak to him next time he comes in very systematically to help put him at ease. i thought that was so nice of her. when she left she hugged me again and said she's so happy for us....

Anyway, while I was talking with her she was reveiwing my chart and stopped to review my u/s pics from my twins...I couldn't help but see what she was looking at...she had a lot of pics...it made me sad...I keep thinking what will I do if that happens again...I'm so scared to lose this baby too. It's been on my mind for 2 days now...I keep seeing those u/c pics every time I close my eyes
__________________
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
Reply With Quote
  #2  
January 13th, 2006, 08:03 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,417
I love you so much and am praying for you every day. I am not even that religious. I just know one thing, If anyone deserves this baby it is most definatly you Norina.
Even when I am hurting and cant bring myself to the message boards I think about you every day.

How are you feeling physically?

It must be so hard to see u/s pics of the twins.

Hang in there sweetheart. Just know I am here for you ---
__________________

Pregnancy Loss April 2009, September 2010
CP 10/2008, 1/3/11 {missing my babies every single day}Mommy to 4 Children - 3 boys ages 22, 21 and 18 & baby Scarlett
After 2.5 years TTC with 4 losses our Family was given the gift of Miss Scarlett
.
Do not ever give up hope...


Miss Scarlett... Our miracle girl still brings happy tears to my eyes.



Reply With Quote
  #3  
January 14th, 2006, 02:59 AM
LeedaRenee's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,923
Norina, sending big cyber hugs your way.

It's hard for me to see my U/S too, so much in fact that for awhile whenever I would go and look at it, I would burst into tears and shut myself in a room for a few hours. I've looked at it since I got p/g and think, I loved that baby so much and I tried not to love this one, but I do. Please let this one go right. And you know what? I think it will, I think it will for all of us this time around. I have faith now.

As for your doc, she sounds awesome! Very on top of things. You are so lucky.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #4  
January 14th, 2006, 06:35 AM
hopin4a4rth
Guest
Posts: n/a
Sending you hugs too.

I have a u/s pic of the second baby I lost in my planner. I looked at it often & miss that baby, but thank God for giving me another chance w/ this one.

M/C is hard & pregnancy after m/c is flooded w/ so many emotions. (((hugs)))
Reply With Quote
  #5  
January 15th, 2006, 02:45 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
You ladies are all so very sweet...thank you for validating my feelings...Missy your post made me cry...you are an amazing friend. I know God is listening to both our prayers...i'll continue praying for you too. Much love,
__________________
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
Reply With Quote
  #6  
January 15th, 2006, 03:47 PM
soontobemommyto3
Guest
Posts: n/a
I guess I'm weird. I love my u/s pictures of my baby girl. They are the only pictures I have of her. She looks so beautiful to me.

Norina, it is only normal to feel bittersweet about going back to the DRs and seeing things like that. I had to lie on the same table where i found out Cassie was dead a month ago. It was weird. Then when I saw the video tape (they video tape the big ultrasounds) on the ultrasound machine and it had my name on it from my u/s in August when she was ok .

It gets easier though. I don't know why, but it seems when people get past their loss week, they feel better. I still have a long way to go to get to that, but I'm sure even for me I will feel like I passed some big milestone.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
January 15th, 2006, 03:50 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
i understand what you're syaing...I have that u/s on 1/25...i fear this will be the longest 1 1/2 weeks of my life...i anticipate closing my eyes and holding my breath when we do the u/s until I hear my dr say it's ok to look...
It is strange to return to a place where you found the most heartbreaking news of your life. When I returned to p/u the blood order forms everyone remembered me...like by name...I had 3 different nurses ask me how I am..I gues my story made an impression...when I was making my appt for the u/s, one overheard and came runnign over asking ,"are you pregnant?" and hugged me. Sweet to know I was thought of...
I can't wait till i pass my loss week...
__________________
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
Reply With Quote
  #8  
January 15th, 2006, 04:35 PM
soontobemommyto3
Guest
Posts: n/a
When I checked in for my first appt the nurse was like "Oh I saw your name on the list for today and I was so happy for you!". I know it is sweet but it also feels weird too, like I don't want to be special for this reason.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
January 16th, 2006, 04:32 AM
Blessings B's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 3,422
You are in my thoughts. B
Reply With Quote
  #10  
January 16th, 2006, 09:12 AM
iamkc's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Montana
Posts: 8,137
Send a message via AIM to iamkc
Norina and Susan, I've actually counted myself lucky through all of this that I have a different doc now and they don't have my later u/s. I didn't let them in on one of the pregnancies because I knew it was failing. The only one they have is the last miscarriage, and there's nothing on the screen. I have to admit that that will be easier to see than a viable baby that's no longer with me.

You're both so strong, and you're right--it's always going to be bittersweet. I know that you're both SO STRONG, though, and that these new lives growing inside of you have nothing but the best lives ahead. I'm thinking about both of you.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #11  
January 16th, 2006, 09:28 AM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: CA
Posts: 2,991
Thank you jessica...right back at ya. You are one of the strongest women I have had the pleasure of EVER knowing!!
__________________
Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:59 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0