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I think I am going to have my own style of parenting, not so much like my parents. That is a very long story though, so I won't get into it. I love my parents like crazy, but I have realized as I have gotten older, that they are only human, and they make mistakes like everyone else. I wouldn't trade them in for the world, but I can learn from their mistakes.
I agree with Sam, I've been trying to learn from my parents' mistakes. I think DH is too, because he's pretty different from his parents' parenting style too.
But I also agree with Dee, I'm her mother, not her girlfriend. I want her to be able to talk to me more than I felt I could talk to my mother, but I also want her to understand the boundaries and respect us as parents.
I actually want to be her mother and her friend. I didn't have that with my mom. I couldn't talk to her about "anything". I want them to be able to tell me anything and know that I will love and support them no matter what ( of course if it's bad they will get in trouble, but I'll still love them)
I think overall, my parents did a good job. I do think my in-laws were much too strict and Dh and I have talked about that and how that can drive your kids away from you when you are too overbearing on them.
If I have a daughter I really want to be close to her the way my mom and I are. I think the way my mom did it was as I started getting older, she started treating me more and more like an adult. I got to make some of my own decisions as a teenager. By the time I was in college she never told me what to do, she just offered her advice and love when I was going through something tough. I really hope I can do the same and be able to make that transition from child to friend AND child.
I think for the most part my mom did a good job, I turned out ok, I think
I want to be a mother and their friend, I want them to be able to trust me and tell me stuff. Dh mom was always in her daughters business, reading their letters, diary, listening to their phone conversation, and now her daughters can't stand her, dh can't stand her for too long either. This is what I want to avoid, I want my kids to like hanging out with me, doing stuff with me. I would like dh to me be very involved in their lives too.
I want to parent just like my Dad. I know that my mom meant well and just wanted to make sure that we lived up to our potential, but she is very over bearing and controling. And all of her yelling got to the point where my brother and I would tune her out, but one "I'm disappointed" from my dad made me want to cry. I knew he expected me to do well, but I also knew that he would love me no matter what and all he wanted was for me to try my best.
__________________ Amy: Wife to my Handsome Husband Mommy to my superhero, Max (3) and Luckiest Bonus Mama to Sammy (5)