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  #1  
March 21st, 2009, 06:57 PM
tatanickel81's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: currently: North Carolina
Posts: 438
Hi, everyone... First let me say that I am SOOOO happy to be joining you!!!

Our previous pregnancy was lost at 14 weeks. We found out it was a molar pregnancy and I had a D&C the same day as my ultra sound. It was heartbreaking for both of us. We waiting 6 months as the doctor suggested, and started trying again in January. Last time it took almost 5 months to get pregnant, and this time, it was only a month!!!! LMP was Feb 15 and I got my BFP about 10 days ago!!! We're so excited, but very scared. I have an ultrasound scheduled for April 15 when I'm 8 weeks to verify that everything is okay... I'm trying not to be too excited until I found out that it's a normal pregnancy, but it's hard. At the same time, I'm terrified that I will go in and found out I need another D&C... I don't know what to do with myself. Every cramp or twinge has me worried that I'm having a miscarriage. I just can't wait for April to get here so I can find out that I'm okay... I'm not sure I could go through it again.....

But for now, I'm trying to stay positive and optomistic, but it's really hard. This will be DH's first child, and my second. My DD is already 7, and I've wanted another one for over three years. DH finally agreed last Feb and now a year later, I'm really hoping this is it... I'm really emotional but thank God I'm not really sick like I was last time.

How do I comfort myself to not worry so much? How do I convince myself that everything will be okay? I want to enjoy my pregnancy, but I'm so afraid to... I'm afraid that it will just be another false hope.

I'm sorry this is a little depressing. I'm overjoyed at getting a BFP, but so scared too. Any suggestions?
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  #2  
March 21st, 2009, 08:30 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Upstate SC
Posts: 4,443
Sorry for your loss but congrats on your new pregnancy.
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  #3  
March 21st, 2009, 09:08 PM
tatanickel81's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: currently: North Carolina
Posts: 438
Thank you... I'm really looking forward to my ultra sound to put my mind at ease... I think it might be okay this time!!!!
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  #4  
March 21st, 2009, 09:11 PM
Melanie0507's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,593
First,

I am sorry for your loss but I am excited that you get to join us!

As far as getting through this pregnancy, I would say just try to take it one day at a time. This will be a tough time for you, but please feel free to jump right in here--this group of women have been a real lifesaver through me during this pregnancy.

I look forward to getting to know you!
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  #5  
March 21st, 2009, 11:04 PM
dee68's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Illinois ( originally From New Jersey:)
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I am so sorry for your loss....

welcome to the board and Congratulations ! I am so glad you have joined us and I look forward to getting to know you. The ladies here are wonderful and understand all of the fears that go along with PAL.
jump right on in with us !
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  #6  
March 22nd, 2009, 01:15 AM
IAMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 5,318
Congratulaitons on your pregnancy, and WELCOME to PAL! I am very sorry to hear about your loss.

I think all of us here can relate to how you are feeling. PAL is very scary, and it's very normal to worry so much. I know alot of ppl including myself have used sort of a goal system to help with the anxiety, for instance: For every goal or milestone in this pregnancy that you pass, celebrate it. You can set little goals like "I've reach 5 weeks" or "First Dr. Appt." I try to have one goal a week. It helps make you concentrate on the good in your pg, and helps you concentrate on the now.

Also, this board is filled with ppl that are very supportive and caring, so jump right in.
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  #7  
March 22nd, 2009, 03:23 AM
princesskate's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: huddersfield, west yorkshire
Posts: 22,139
I am sorry for your loss, and congrats on this pregnancy

I was and still am really scared. But not as much as I was in the early days. Someone here gave me some really good advice (I think it was Brittanie) She said to remind myself that this second/minute/hour/day I AM still pregnant, and to treasure everyday I am still pregnant. This has helped me a great deal.

I also set myself little goals, I tend to set weekly goals and my next one is to reach 14 weeks! I do also have a biggish milestone set out in my head though, and that is to reach 20 weeks. I find setting little milestones has also helped me a great deal!

Also, sharing my fears with the ladies here and getting reassurrance (sp?) from them also helps me. I also look at the ladies here who have had their babies and that gives me hope. The ladies here are wonderful and I dont know what I would do without them
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  #8  
March 22nd, 2009, 07:38 AM
fairy9800's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Jackson, Michigan
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Congrats!! I'm sorry to hear about your loss and I will keep you in my T's and P's for a healthy sicky bean!!
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  #9  
March 22nd, 2009, 08:24 AM
L-SBB's Avatar Bébé Cowgirl
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,810
congrats and welcome! being worried comes with the territory here, so you're in good company...best wishes for a healthy & happy 9 months for you and the little one!
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  #10  
March 22nd, 2009, 02:00 PM
kellyanne's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington
Posts: 1,960
Welcome, congrats, and don't worry about us judging for feeling nervous and not being able to completely get into the excitement of pregnancy. We know exactly what that feels like. With this one I was so guarded that I was past 20 weeks before I even let myself think about having a baby in June. I felt guilty, but I think it is normal to protect your emotions after being through so much. Jump right in, the board is a great way to talk about your fears without stressing out those people in your real life who don't quite understand. Like others have said, we also know how to celebrate those little milestones that others might not even think about.
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  #11  
March 22nd, 2009, 03:23 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
Quote:
Originally Posted by princesskate View Post
I am sorry for your loss, and congrats on this pregnancy

I was and still am really scared. But not as much as I was in the early days. Someone here gave me some really good advice (I think it was Brittanie) She said to remind myself that this second/minute/hour/day I AM still pregnant, and to treasure everyday I am still pregnant. This has helped me a great deal.

I also set myself little goals, I tend to set weekly goals and my next one is to reach 14 weeks! I do also have a biggish milestone set out in my head though, and that is to reach 20 weeks. I find setting little milestones has also helped me a great deal!

Also, sharing my fears with the ladies here and getting reassurrance (sp?) from them also helps me. I also look at the ladies here who have had their babies and that gives me hope. The ladies here are wonderful and I dont know what I would do without them
Yep, that must have been me, since I was going to say it again. lol!

So, Congrats and welcome! This board has gotten me through 2 pregnancies so far. There are wonderful ladies here.
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  #12  
March 23rd, 2009, 10:12 AM
Wee3monkeys's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 3,352
Hi! Welcome to PAL! CONGRATS on your pregnancy! And I'm so sorry for your loss.

Ditto what the other ladies have said! I'm in complete agreement. I always say the second thing that Kate said above, each new day, each week, is a milestone. Setting them, and striving for just that goal before you look to the new one, really helped me. And as both she and Brittanie said, cherish each and every moment and take them one at a time; and pretty soon you'll find that you've made it further than you can believe and will wonder where the time went to.

Welcome again!
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  #13  
March 23rd, 2009, 12:46 PM
kalis's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: IL
Posts: 6,523
welcome and congrats on your pregnancy.
the things that helped me emotionally get through my pregnancy was to take it one day at a time. i just didn't focus on, and tried not to worry about, the future. and i definitely depended on the other ladies on this board, i am so thankful for them.
and the third thing that helped was having a good doctor. if i had a problem or concern they always encouraged me to come in and get checked out. reassuance every step of the way kept me from going crazy.
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  #14  
March 23rd, 2009, 01:12 PM
jenn27's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: McGehee, Arkansas
Posts: 2,672
I'm so very sorry for your loss but a huge congrats on your pregnancy. These women are wonderful and I'm sure you will feel right at home here.

As far as the worrying goes, I don't know if there is really an answer to that question. I am almost 22 weeks now and I still worry that one day I will go in for an appt and there will be no heartbeat. I just try to remind myself to enjoy and be thankful for everyday that I have will this little miracle. I pray that your u/s going wonderfully and that you are holding a precious little baby in a few months.

So glad you joined us and hope this pregnancy is very smooth and you can begin to get excited and enjoy it.
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  #15  
March 24th, 2009, 04:38 PM
tatanickel81's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: currently: North Carolina
Posts: 438
Thank you all so much for your encouraging responses! It's so nice to feel so welcome and understood. I try not to think too much about what's going on, but it's hard. I'm just waiting for my ultra sound, and praying every night that things will turn out all right. My doctor is okay, but I go to a military facility, so it's not the same. My first appt was on April 20th for some kind of orientation, so dumb, and I had to fight with the nurse to get me in sooner. But once they talked to the doctor, things went well. I have a wonderful doctor who did all of my follow up with the molar pregnancy, and I'm lucky that I will continue to see him throughout this one....

Thank you all, and good luck to all of us!
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