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Too much Confusion and Worry...


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
May 8th, 2010, 05:28 AM
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 3
My fiance is a Marine. In March, we decided to get married once he returned from deployment. I'm also in the Navy, so the few times he did get to talk, it wasn't long. Just to say, hey, I love you, and by the way, I'm pregnant...

My ex husband and I had lost a baby in 2008, when I was eight weeks. I'm currently 5 weeks and 5 days as of now. I'm freaking out over every little pinch or cramp that I experience, and I obviously have no one to tell my worries to.

I don't know how worried I should be. My first ob/gyn appt isn't for a bit. Not only did I just got taken off my ship, which I'm pretty torn up about, Michael is in Afghanistan and I havent heard from him in a few days, and I'm pregnant and freaking out because I don't want to lose this baby.

I've taken a pregnancy test just about every other day just to make sure it still says that I am pregnant because sometimes I just dont feel pregnant. Other than a little bubbly feeling, breast tenderness, and moodswings, I don't feel anything extravagant.. or should I even feel anything at this point? Am I expecting too much this early?

Sometimes I just dont feel attached to this pregnancy. I feel like crap about it because I dont know if it's a subconcious way to protect myself from what I feel would be inevitable or what. Or maybe all of this worrying about losing the baby is the fact that I am dearly attached to this pregnancy??

I'm so confused.
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  #2  
May 8th, 2010, 06:13 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 2,992
I feel the same way you do, i lost my baby last may, at 5 wks 4 days. Im 8 weeks 4days pregnant know and every little pain i get i think this is it, and i get so scared. Like now i have been haveing killer pain in my Abdominal/pelvis area since yesterday, but my doctor said as long as no bleeding then everything should be fine. I def dont feel attached to this pregnancy at all, and i probly wont be till i see the baby on the ultrasound. But im like u takeing test just to make sure im still pregnant.
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  #3  
May 8th, 2010, 07:30 AM
Natalie_Snow's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,247
I feel the same way you do. I am testing every morning just to make sure that the second line is still there.. sometimes i feel a little bit of cramping and it scares me so much!!! I feel attached to this pregnancy already.. because during my second pg i was so scared and did not feel attached..and it ended in another m/c... so i am really attached this time around. Every time I start panicking, I calm myself down and think positive!! I do not have anyone to talk to ether...

My friends expressed their concern about me getting pg and having m/c.. so I'm not telling them this time. My DH is scared about the possibility of another m/c and I want him to enjoy this PG... so i keep it to myself and try to stay calm and cool. I am not telling any of my relatives until 12 weeks.

Every pregnancy is different so i think it's fine if you don't feel anything extravagant. It's still early. I usually pay attention to bbs tenderness.. because with both of my m/c I lost that symptom on that same day..

Maybe read something positive or look up expiring quotes online. I decided to look up something nice and exciting every day to keep myself from thinking about a m/c..
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  #4  
May 8th, 2010, 08:30 AM
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 3
I was actually reading on the home page and it said that not feeling anything this early is pretty normal. It made me feel a little better. I do have breast tenderness and I sleep a lot because I'm so tired.
I'm trying not to worry abotu it so much, because it seems to help. I has a missed miscarriage last time, so I didn't have bleeding or cramping, but I had severe vomitting for three days in which I couldn't eat at all.
Im trying to stay positive.. trying.
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  #5  
May 8th, 2010, 09:39 AM
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KDD KDD is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 16,068
I think that I was trying to protect myself in case of another loss. I didn't have a lot of symptoms and I had convinced myself that this was another loss. It wasn't until we had our 7 week u/s and they confirmed that everything was okay that I was able to relax and my symptoms finally started to show.

One of the things that I did before the u/s was to test weekly with a digital test with a conception indicator. As long as the conception indicator kept progressing I had a level of reassurance.

Best of luck to you!
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  #6  
May 8th, 2010, 04:02 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,619
welcome to the Pregnancy After Loss board - and congratulations on your pregnancy!

I'm Emma (26), single mummy to Gabrielle (3 1/2) & 33w pregnant with Emersyn. I have experienced 4 losses, over a 6 year period, so I understand all too well, how nervewracking it is, to be pregnant after a loss. The first trimester can be SO hard, because often you don't have a lot of symptoms, your symptoms can come and go - and obviously there isn't the reassurance, of feeling regular movement yet. The symptoms you did mention sound very positive to me - my worst early pregnancy symptoms, for my two 'sticky' pregnancies, have been breast tenderness & fatigue.. sleep sleep sleep.. couldn't get enough!

It's normal to feel twinges, pulling, stretching & cramping in your uterus - your uterus is doing a LOT of growing right now, and I know that I have always had cramping until around 13-14 weeks, and then after that point, I get it on & off until around 20 weeks. It's also normal to not be experiencing a whole myriad of symptoms at this point - my cousins g/f is around 7-8 weeks pregnant, and the only symptoms she really has is the fatigue & a loss of appetite... she had an u/s at 5.5w & everything looked great.

Make good use of this board - we're all here for you, and all understand what you're going through!!!!
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