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How do I stop worrying??


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
May 22nd, 2006, 09:19 AM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Midwest
Posts: 15,245
Sorry girls, I just needed somewhere to vent and this seemed like the right place. I can't stop worrying about every ache and pain. I thought once I got past the 3 month marker that my stress and worries would ease up but they just seem to get worse the further along I get. I keep getting pressure and cramping and so far have had a bladder infection and I think its coming back. But everytime I start to experience any type of pain or pressure I think that I am going to lose the baby prematurely. I have a bad habit of reading all the bad posts about people losing there babies past the 20 week marker and it scares me to death. I just can' t seem to shake it...I wish there was something I could do to help to ease my stress.

sorry girls, i just am making myself sick worrying....uggh
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  #2  
May 22nd, 2006, 10:32 AM
Mega Super Mommy
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Don't be sorry at all!! I made a similar post a couple of weeks ago and you are much further along then me! I have good days and bad days - some days I am totally confident that things are good and some days are just days where I sit there and feel like I just know something is going to go wrong. I've kind of learned there is nothing I can do about it. Unfortunately we've all suffered a loss that kind of takes some of the excitement out of our pregancy (atleast for me it does) because that gets replaced by fear. It's unfortunate it has to be like this but its understandable with what we've all been through. I'm just trying to take it one day at a time and stay positive and realize that this is a different pregnancy then the 3 that I lost and maybe you can do the same. Today I feel like I have gas but instead of just saying its gas I'm ready to go to the dr because what if its cramps - I can't even tell the difference anymore I'm so freaked out.

Just try to take it one day at a time and stay positive - you've been through a lot and you have to just hope in your heart that all is going to be fine this time for you its really all you can do. Just know you aren't alone though - we all feel that way!
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<span style="color:#333399">JACK MATTHEW BORN NOVEMBER 25TH AT 4:39PM WEIGHING 7LBS 11OZ, 20.5 INCHES





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  #3  
May 22nd, 2006, 10:50 AM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Don't be sorry at all!! I made a similar post a couple of weeks ago and you are much further along then me! I have good days and bad days - some days I am totally confident that things are good and some days are just days where I sit there and feel like I just know something is going to go wrong. I've kind of learned there is nothing I can do about it. Unfortunately we've all suffered a loss that kind of takes some of the excitement out of our pregancy (atleast for me it does) because that gets replaced by fear. It's unfortunate it has to be like this but its understandable with what we've all been through. I'm just trying to take it one day at a time and stay positive and realize that this is a different pregnancy then the 3 that I lost and maybe you can do the same. Today I feel like I have gas but instead of just saying its gas I'm ready to go to the dr because what if its cramps - I can't even tell the difference anymore I'm so freaked out.

Just try to take it one day at a time and stay positive - you've been through a lot and you have to just hope in your heart that all is going to be fine this time for you its really all you can do. Just know you aren't alone though - we all feel that way![/b]

your reply is so sweet. Thank you for making me feel somewhat "normal". I know what you mean about some days are good and some days are bad. Some days I think "geesh, why was I so worried last week" and then other days I can get myself into a panic over gas or constipation! It really stinks that our enjoyment can't be the same as everyone elses b/c we have experienced a loss. I guess all we can do is just pray and put our trust in God and hope that it is going to work out. It's just so scary and the bigger I get and the more I feel him move the more I think "what if something happened now, it would hurt so much" sometimes I wish i could shut my brain off and just go around in a daze until I have him.
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  #4  
May 22nd, 2006, 10:56 AM
Mega Super Mommy
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I know exactly how you feel - our 3 losses were all early before 7 weeks and we got to see the hb once with each so I thought I'd be fine once I got past that point but I was wrong. Now that we've seen little legs and feet and hands I'm completely attached and terrified of loosing this little one. I dont think that fear goes away unfortunately. The nurse at the dr office said to me "You wont be totally relaxed until you're carrying the baby out of the hospital" and I've realized she's right!!!! Hang in there!
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<span style="color:#333399">JACK MATTHEW BORN NOVEMBER 25TH AT 4:39PM WEIGHING 7LBS 11OZ, 20.5 INCHES





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  #5  
May 22nd, 2006, 11:33 AM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thanks hun, you too!! And PM me anytime, we can stress together
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  #6  
May 22nd, 2006, 11:49 AM
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Thanks hun, you too!! And PM me anytime, we can stress together [/b]

I can always use a stressing partner in crime - or possibly we can just calm each other down!!!
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<span style="color:#333399">JACK MATTHEW BORN NOVEMBER 25TH AT 4:39PM WEIGHING 7LBS 11OZ, 20.5 INCHES





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  #7  
May 22nd, 2006, 01:09 PM
Blue Eyes 409's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I so know how you feel I went threw the same thing when I first got Pregnant this time. Even after I passed the point of M/C I was still scared to death that something will happen this time also. I think after you have had a loss that the fear will always be there but as time goes on I have found it easier to deal with. I hope that it will get easier for you also if you ever want to talk feel free to message me.
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  #8  
May 22nd, 2006, 03:44 PM
soontobemommyto3
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just wanted to add, I haven't stopped worrying either. Infact now that I'm far enough along that the baby could survive if born, I am probably driving my OB nuts. I'm calling about a lot of things and asking Will this hurt the baby???

I told him to expect me to be nuerotic from now until the end. Maybe he'll deliever me early just to get me to stop bugging him
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  #9  
May 22nd, 2006, 05:43 PM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thank you ladies, I think i will feel better once i know he is to a point that he can survive without me. I just worry so much now because if something happened he really woudln't havea chance. I know what you mean about calling the doctor.... they know me by my voice right now...
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  #10  
May 25th, 2006, 02:52 AM
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I too still worry. I wish I could be like I was with my 1st pregnancy before any m/c. You all know that feeling..the feeling that there isn't a care in the world because you know you are going to have a healthy baby with no worries. But after having 1 let alone multiple m/c that joy just isn't there yet. Hillary put it best when she said it has been replace by fear. It's sad but true. The thing is that you do have to get through it somehow and just remember that you have the JM site for support. I wish I wouldv'e found it sooner then maybe I wouldn't have felt so alone. When others are stressing about the same thing you feel "normal" what ever that is. I am 14 wks 5 days EDD 11/18 and will don't know when I'll stop worrying. I still look after wiping just to make sure there is no blood (if TMI I'm sorry)Take care..keep your chin up.

Breanna
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  #11  
May 25th, 2006, 05:00 PM
mrs_catty_marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I know how you feel. I am still scared about this one, and I honestly don't think that feeling will go away till this ones in my arms. It's always on the back of my mind that something could happen. But I try to remember that it hasn't happened yet and that I need to enjoy this as much as I can because I would regret it if I didn't.

Good luck! And lots of hugs!
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  #12  
May 27th, 2006, 05:10 PM
Running Queen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I'm not pregnant, but I totally know that I'll be a nut case when I do get preggo. You ladies are great and I'm excited for all of you to have happy, healthy babies. Good luck and congrats!

Jen
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