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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
June 1st, 2006, 11:07 AM
Boxerlove1's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,299
It seems like the first 17 weeks just flew by.... but now time has almost stopped. The month of May felt like a friggin eternity. And now, it seems like October will never arrive

I have 2 dr's appointments a month, probably more now that I'm in the 'IC' phase.. It seems like I am fine for about a week after the appointment, and then my mind starts obsessing again... For instance, I have a appointment next wednesday, but I called my other doctor and scheduled one for tomorrow to have a cervix measurement and check for fluid leak. Why? I just have to I guess. I'm paranid. I feel like every movement may be the last I feel, so I can't enjoy it too much. I know discharge is common in pregnancy, but every time I have some (occasional, not too common) I feel like I MUST be leaking fluid....

Every little thing is freaking me out, and instead of getting better, I feel like I'm getting worse. I keep telling myself that as long as I make it past 26 weeks (when I lost Sebastian) that I will be ok, but it seems like that day will never come.

I don't know what to do - I feel like I would be best off to take a LOA from work for a few weeks, but I need my doctor to approve that, which as long as my cervix is in good shape, they probably wont

How the he11 am I supposed to stay sane for the next 8 weeks?
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  #2  
June 1st, 2006, 11:32 AM
nmbatey's Avatar Regular
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 76
I'm so sorry you are so worried. I know there's not much anyone can do, but please know I understand and am keeping you in my prayers. I've found the best way to ease you mind is to call the nurse at least. I always apologize for being a worry wart, but she says that's what she's there for. It sounds like you have a supportive doctor, which is good. Try to stay postive. I know it's hard.
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  #3  
June 1st, 2006, 12:46 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,406
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I know what you're going through and I know how long each day feels! I kept saying I'd be fine once I got past my furtherst m/c point but I'm well passed that and I still worry constantly. I rented a doppler so I do honestly check for the hb everyday and that has kept me somewhat. I'm like you though I go every two weeks and for the first couple of days I'm fine and then bam back to panic and worry mode. I dont know if it will get easier but just take it one day at a time and try to keep yourself as busy as possible (easier said than done) As far as work, do what is good for you but I almost think if I wasn't at work I'd be even worse then I am because I'd sit around and think about things 24/7. You're doing just great though and you aren't alone!!!!
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  #4  
June 1st, 2006, 01:59 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 3,598
BOY can I relate!! May did seem to drag on forever! Cripes!

I know it sounds like "duh yea right" but those 8 weeks will fly...just think, remember being 8 weeks, how it felt like you would NEVER get to 16 weeks or 17 weeks? I am nearly 36 weeks and am still like COME ON ALREADY.

I don't know...its impossible to tell you to "occupy your mind/time with other things" because well its impossible. And I think you are right on the mark to be very vigalent about your discharge and fluid checks. More than once I have read about a mom who was leaking fluid and just wrote it off as "extra discharge" only to find out later that it was fluid afterall! So darn right to schedule a check for it. I don't have much discharge and baby is super active, so that has been whats keeping me from obsessing too too much.

I don't really know what to offer other than to tell you to be encouraged, time will come along. And you will be 26, 28, 30, 36 and more before you even know it.

(((HUGS)))
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  #5  
June 1st, 2006, 05:56 PM
wclark602002's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: TENNESSEE
Posts: 4,464
Quote:
It seems like the first 17 weeks just flew by.... but now time has almost stopped. The month of May felt like a friggin eternity. And now, it seems like October will never arrive

I have 2 dr's appointments a month, probably more now that I'm in the 'IC' phase.. It seems like I am fine for about a week after the appointment, and then my mind starts obsessing again... For instance, I have a appointment next wednesday, but I called my other doctor and scheduled one for tomorrow to have a cervix measurement and check for fluid leak. Why? I just have to I guess. I'm paranid. I feel like every movement may be the last I feel, so I can't enjoy it too much. I know discharge is common in pregnancy, but every time I have some (occasional, not too common) I feel like I MUST be leaking fluid....

Every little thing is freaking me out, and instead of getting better, I feel like I'm getting worse. I keep telling myself that as long as I make it past 26 weeks (when I lost Sebastian) that I will be ok, but it seems like that day will never come.

I don't know what to do - I feel like I would be best off to take a LOA from work for a few weeks, but I need my doctor to approve that, which as long as my cervix is in good shape, they probably wont

How the he11 am I supposed to stay sane for the next 8 weeks?[/b]

dont really know how to help but just wanted to say im rite there with ya!i want so bad to just forward wind everything and have this baby.Zacks due date is in 5 days too so thats got me pretty bad.just a bad time all over.i hope you find a way to relax.pat little leo for me
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  #6  
June 1st, 2006, 06:04 PM
*~Candy~*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Midwest
Posts: 15,245
Oh hun I know how you feel since I have had all my issues it seems like the "safe" point will never make it here and I have been to L&D two times in one week worried about every little contraction and pain. I guess once something tradgic has happened in our lives the only way we can get over it is just to naturally worry. Sometimes I wish we all could just enjoy our pregnancies, it doesn't seem fair that we will always have that fear in the back of our minds. I wish we lived closer so we could hang out all day and worry together.

You have every right to worry and if you feel better going to the doctor for reassurance than I so go for it. I hope everything is okay and if you need someone to talk to please PM me anytime. Okay??

Lots and lots of **HUGS** Try to stay calm for baby Leo (okay) ?

keep your chin up and let us know what the doctor says
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  #7  
June 1st, 2006, 06:13 PM
koakoba's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5,063
Oh hun. I know there are no words to magically make everything better. I wish there was. I log on everynight at midnight just to see my ticker go forward another day. Try to pamper yourself as much as possible, and know you are doing everything possible to keep Leo healthy and happy. Do you have a dopplar? Maybe that would help? I don't know. Big Big HUGS. You will get through this. Honestly, if you think a leave is what you need, talk to your doctor. Mine was willing to give me a "mental" break whenever I need it. Stress is a valid health consern, they would not be making anything up or being dishonest.
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