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Does anyone still worry after 12 weeks?


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  • 1 Post By Jessghetti
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  #1  
May 14th, 2012, 12:22 AM
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I made a thread simular to this where I talked about not wanting to register in case anything went wrong.

Has anyone else continued to worry about their pregnancy even after 12 weeks? I'm 24 weeks right now and I still worry about losing this baby. I think that if I had another older child before I had my miscarriage I wouldn't feel this way. And I know that miscarriages are much less common after 12 weeks but I worry about having a still birth. I even get nervous if I don't feel the baby move! Not that I expect him to be moving 24/7 but if it feels like it's been awhile since I last felt him. And I feel like I'll continue to worry after he is born. I wonder if I just got pregnant too soon after the loss and if I should have waited longer?

And random but everytime I go into the baby section of stores i get all teary. I think this is just due to hormones.
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  #2  
May 14th, 2012, 12:51 AM
Jessghetti's Avatar New Mommy in Training
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If the baby has made it this far along then there was obviously nothing wrong with your egg or your partner's sperm and getting pregnant too soon after loss isn't an issue.

I got pregnant the very next month after having a miscarriage and now I am 24 weeks along. I heard at 16 weeks the risk of miscarriage goes down quite a bit - even more then at 12 weeks.

Also my girl doesn't kick all the time, she will have times of the day when she will move more then others. Remember the baby is on his or her own schedule and will be more active during certain times of the day or night then others. If you don't feel 10 kicks within 2 hours though, you should call your doctor. Generally if you are worried laying on your left side after eating or drinking something cold or sugary will usually get the baby to kick.

I have times when I worry about loosing the baby, having her premature or stillborn but I try to be optimistic and enjoy the time being pregnant the best I can.If you are having so much anxiety it is interfering with your life you may consult your Doctor about getting some anti-depressants for it.
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  #3  
May 14th, 2012, 05:35 AM
momof8lopez's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My anxiety with my last three girls (one of them is 9) was worse in the 2nd and 3rd trimesters. I dont know why, but it has always been my fear of loosing a later pregnancy more than a early pregnancy. I have lost one pregnancy at 14wks, but it was a blighted ovum, so I never saw a h/b. I dont think thats why my anxiety is higher later on, just think you get such a emotional attachment when you feel them move and they have made it to viability. I think its normal. Just have to enjoy as much as you can and try very hard to push the fear aside.
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  #4  
May 14th, 2012, 08:45 AM
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I think some women are born worriers and some can move forward a little easier.

I had four early losses and was terrified for most of my pregnancy that something would happen to him. It was just as bad in later weeks as it was in earlier ones. Even now, he is 8 months, and I get moments of panic that something might take him away from me. Obviously I am a worrier

I don't see it as abnormal for me, it doesn't stop me from doing things and letting him explore. It doesn't impede his life or mine. If it did, I would be more concerned. There is certainly a degree to which worrying after a loss is normal. For each person, that threshold is different.

But I am a mom and I worry. I actually do not find that having an older child lessens my worry. But I was far less worried about him before my losses. Now I worry more.

Try to enjoy what you can. But don't think it is abnormal to be nervous to register or be scared when the baby doesn't move much. There are plenty of ladies in here who can tell you they felt the same way and that it is a fairly normal feeling in a pregnancy after a loss.
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  #5  
May 14th, 2012, 09:46 AM
LindseyE117's Avatar Wookie's Girl
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I am 35 weeks and I am still terrified of losing him. It does not help when you hear all these horror stories of later losses. Just think of it this way, you have reached viability. He may be small if something happens, but you can have him.
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  #6  
May 14th, 2012, 10:22 AM
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I am over 34 weeks and worry constantly. I worry more now then I did when I was in my first trimester because I'm so attached to my baby now. We named her, I feel her move all day and we have all the stuff ready for her! (well I haven't set it up yet cause once again I'm scared! Haha) I think still birth would be a million times worse than my 3 early losses and I took those extremely hard. So yeah. I'm a nervous wreck. Maybe when I hold my little girl for my first time I'll get a sigh of relief! But even after the worrying will start again...
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  #7  
May 14th, 2012, 01:18 PM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm 28 weeks, and I worry all the time. I'm scare of stillbirth, like Kayla said, it would be much worse than my early loss.
You will be a mom before you know and the worries will still not go away.
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  #8  
May 14th, 2012, 01:29 PM
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As a mother, you never stop worrying, from time of finding out you are pregnant (even before that) until you have the baby and I am sure beyond. I had a m/c at 8 weeks with my first, had a very healthy pregnancy (getting pregnant after getting AF only 1 time) and I worried through that entire pregnancy, I did relax and enjoy much of it, but I had my worry times, I called my doc, went in when I felt I needed reassurance, all helped to ease my mind. I had another loss at 12 weeks last year and again got pregnant right away and am now 34+2 pregnant with no apparent issues. I still worry here and there and sometimes I just sit and make sure baby is moving and it is reassuring...I think we all worry to a certain extent, it's a motherly thing

If you think it is taking over your life though, I would talk to your doctor, that could be something more, it shouldn't interfere with everyday things, shouldn't consume your every thought, but, it is certainly completely normal (and doesn't get better with an older child) to worry to a point.

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  #9  
May 15th, 2012, 07:01 AM
luvmykids623's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I worried constantly until the moment they were in my arms.... then the worry just shifted to something else. I'm a born worrier, and most moms are worriers, so it's just what I do.
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  #10  
May 15th, 2012, 02:42 PM
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I worried up until 38 weeks and 2 days.

That's when I delivered.

And then my worrying just got even worse!

Yeah, I'm a worrier.
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  #11  
May 20th, 2012, 04:27 PM
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Totally normal to worry until the day you hold them, and then a whole new kind of worry starts . Don't feel bad that you worry it comes with the territory in PAL.
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  #12  
May 20th, 2012, 05:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JessP View Post
Totally normal to worry until the day you hold them, and then a whole new kind of worry starts . Don't feel bad that you worry it comes with the territory in PAL.
Totally agree. I'm SO glad that we've all found this group - as sad as it is to know others who have suffered a loss, IMO the only ones who can *totally* understand, are others who have gone through losses. We all understand!
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  #13  
May 22nd, 2012, 08:34 AM
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YES.
Even at the hospital in full blown labor when checking me in they looked for the heartbeat and I was in the middle of a contraction and she searched for what seemed forever and I started to panic.
I did not take tags off much until we brought him home. I even had reciepts taped to everything.
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  #14  
May 22nd, 2012, 12:09 PM
StaceygirlPa's Avatar Waiting for our Miracle.
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I agree with the other ladies. It is totally normal. I worried until they laid Cody in my arms. Now that he is here it is a different kind of worry. Dh tells me all the time I worry to much.
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