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As a first time mom I was trying to look up birthing videos to see if that would help or make me feel better and well, no. It doesn't help at all! I think it makes me more nervous then anything else. I don't feel there is much I can really learn by watching someone else push a baby out - truly I think it is an experience you have to have for yourself.
Plus it really does range, some women act as if they are being killed - others seem to have it rather easy and all variations inbetween. Sometimes I just think to myself 'I hope I have a c-section so I won't have to do all that pushing and stuff' because right now it seems like an almost impossible task to do.
Maybe it will be different the closer I get, maybe it's something you never get used to or enjoy. I don't know, I have heard some women rave about giving birth and others talk about it pretty grimly. Again, I guess it's a different experience for everybody.
I guess what bothers me most right now is, this is my first child and I plan on having at least one more (at the most 4 children) and well, I am not sure as of right now I want to experience this again. Pregnancy has had it's ups and downs, mostly alot of anxiety and fear. I hope I won't have as much issues with my second baby.
I guess at least next time I will know more of what to expect and anticipate how labor is. But man right now does that stress me out!
So have you ladies had a similar experience when you were having your first child?
Missing Angels: Sept '11 - 4 weeks & Nov '11 - 4 weeks 3 days
I have watched 5 live births and I can tell you it varied with each of them and some were the same woman! My sister had a horrible experience with her first natural birth, her second... she didn't seem like she was stressed or in pain. I think no matter what nothing is really going to prepare you for it until your there and it's happening. I hope that yours goes wonderfully though
My Angels- 12-15-08 @ 13w3d♥ 05-09 @ 6w2d♥ & 2 Early Losses♥ Twins 9-7-10♥ & 10-2-10 ♥ 2/11/11
It's like you looked inside my brain and wrote exactly how I feel. Haha. You put it in the perfect words! I'm the same way! I'm so nervous about labor. Even when I think about it long enough I either get sick to my stomach or cry. I know I'm such a wuss right? Haha.
I have seen all sorts of labor videos and 1 live birth. Women are all different. The live birth was my sister with my nephew and she was a champ. She did get an epidural though but still she was so calm and when she started pushing not even a sound. She just seemed to block everyone else out and focus. Then once he was born BAM her mommy instincts kicked in! Her first words were "Is he too small? Why is he so small?" (He was a perfect 7 pounds but her husband is like 285 pounds and 6"6 so she was expecting much bigger! Haha) and she just kept saying I know your cold let me hold you and stuff. It was so sweet. My point being is when you hear once that baby is born everyone says you forget the pain from what I saw you really do. She just seemed so in love.
Educate yourself as much as you can and go in with an open mind. I don't have a birth plan except for I do want an epidural and I want let to do anything to keep baby and I safe. That's it.
Some things that help me is:
1) If labor was the most horrendous thing ever people wouldn't have more than 1.
2) Women have been doing this forever... Most with no pain relief.
3) Women in like Africa are forced to give birth on like dirt floors and continue working. (So grateful I live where I do and really wish I could help them!)
4) I have never heard a woman say something like "It wasn't worth it".
5) People say the pain is different than you think. Since its for a "prize" at the end your mind set is a little different then just breaking your leg. Haha
Good luck to both of us! Cause no matter what were stuck now and have no way out. haha
Forever missing my 3 angel babies. Sep 2010, Nov 2010, Jan 2011
I have had 2 babies, and both were absolutely different. One was awful, one was fantastic. It hurts, obviously, but after an hour, you start forgetting. Besides, the pain is for the best thing in the world. It sucks while going through it, then it's over. Then you hold the most awesome thing God created.
Try to ignore horrow stories, "try" to stay calm, amd most importantly, enjoy it while it's happening. Good luck girls!
I already have one kid, but never gone through labor and it freaks me out. I don't listen to other people's birth story, I don't ask. I know it will be painful, I am prepare for the pain (well I hope I am). Have an open mind, read, take classes.
Kayla is right, if it was the most horrible thing in the world people wouldn't have more kids.
Labor is the only pain you can prepare for. Hence why it freaks women out so much. But....it is totally true that you basically "forget" most of the bad stuff. You get the best prize in the world. Yes, pushing is hard work. And sometimes it feels like you really can't do it when you are right there. But the good news is that your baby will come out anyway (yes, even if you don't push, your body will take over) and you will be so in love that it will seem worth it.
All of Kayla's points are true....women wouldn't have two or three or four babies if it was so unbearable they couldn't do it again. I wouldn't count on a c-section being easier. The recovery from them is way more difficult. A friend explained it like: you can do labor and be in pain right then for a short amount of time...or you can do a c-section and have the pain spread out and lengthened. And it makes sense. With a vaginal birth there are some after pains, but not nearly what I hear it is like for a c-section.
And I think most women are somewhat afraid, nervous, or anxious about birth. There are lots of unknowns and it actually doesn't change even with a second, third, or subsequent child. The unknowns are just as great. I was actually more nervous for my second than for my first (not to scare you...but I also was not very nervous at all with my first). And I'll be nervous when I am going for number three too!