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I should be happy


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
October 26th, 2012, 05:49 PM
Krisnina's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Los Angeles, Ca
Posts: 1,076
Hi Ladies,

I'm Kristina and this is the first time I am posting to this room. I found out I was pregnant last Saturday. After my loss in April, and my due date from that pregnancy quickly approaching (Nov.10) I am or should be relieved to be pregnant. Hell, I should be happy...but I'm not. I'm terrified of losing this one as well. I've convinced myself that it is either ectopic, or will just be another loss. I know I should be happy, and excited, but I have such mixed emotions. I had my first bloodwork done at 13DPO and my hcg was 184 and my progesterone 14.6. I go again tomorrow for my second round. I think these are decent numbers, but of course I am searching the entire internet to see how bad it could be. I fear what my second round could be.

I know it could be hormones, but I just feel like crying all the time when I think about it. Anyone else have a similar situation?
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  #2  
October 26th, 2012, 06:48 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 12,271
Congrats on your pregnancy. Yes, I feel the same way you do. My first number was only 31 so I think your number sounds awesome! Good luck with the next BW and let us know how it goes!
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  #3  
October 26th, 2012, 07:06 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6,057
Hugs and welcome! That sounds like a fantastic number to me! I know it's hard to get through when your mind is full of all the worst case scenarios. The only real advice I have is, try to keep busy and distract yourself from it. It will help the time pass more quickly. I know you may feel like you should be able to force yourself into a positive mindset about it, but sometimes IME it is better to just accept that the pregnancy is stressful and try not to think about it too much until it is feeling safer.
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  #4  
October 26th, 2012, 10:24 PM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 12,105
I'm so happy for you that you are pregnant again! Loss points and EDDs are so hard to get through. Take care of yourself and do whatever you feel like to get yourself through.

Those sound like great numbers to me! I had a hCG of 28 or so at 11DPO with this pregnancy so you're probably higher than I was at that point.

I felt the same way about the fear taking over the happiness. Just try to take it day by day and even minute by minute if you need to,
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  #5  
October 27th, 2012, 05:49 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 2,259
Im so happy for you. I completly understand mixed emotions, i was pregnant with twins and recently found out we lost one of the babies. It is really hard to be happy for one baby and sad for the other at the same time. The ladies on here are so supportive and understanding. Please feel free to post any concerns or happy moments. I look forward to getting to know you.
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  #6  
October 27th, 2012, 10:08 AM
momof8lopez's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: illinois
Posts: 8,418
Waiting for the other shoe to drop is so common after loss. It will get easier in time. Your numbers are fantastic for 13dpo. Praying for great doubling times on your next round!!
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Momma of 8 beautiful children now. Most recent is Jerry Jr. born 11/19/12 at 37wk, 7lbs 6oz and 19.5inches and Baby Reymundo born 10/7/13 at 35w6d, 6lbs 7oz, 19.5 inches. Momma of 5 angels. New siggy to come!

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  #7  
October 29th, 2012, 07:56 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,353
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I think what you are feeling is completely normal when you are pregnant after a loss. I felt the same way early in my pregnancy. for me I started to feel better after I passed my loss date and things were still going smoothly. I hope you get some great numbers on your second set. Please let us know how it goes and know that we are here for you to help you get through the tough times in PAL.
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