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Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  #1  
July 5th, 2013, 09:38 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: The Sunshine State
Posts: 269
Hi girls.
It was suggested to me by someone in my ddg to come in and say hello.
I am currently pregnant with my 9th child. I have had 12 pregnancies with 3 previous losses.
My last loss was in 2000, but every pregnancy since then, I have struggled greatly with anxiety throughout the first trimester. I am currently about 6 weeks pregnant. I have an ultrasound set up for wednesday and have been just making myself absolutely sick with worry.

I found out very early at like 3.5 weeks, so this long wait for an u/s is sheer torture. SO much worse than the 2ww's I experienced in the 13+ months we were TTC.

Oh, and I am turning 38 at the end of the month, so that doesn't help the worry either.

Anyhow, that is my story in a nutshell. I won't be offended if you say I don't belong here.
I lurked all day in your group yesterday and it seems like such a fun tight knit group. I love all the support here.
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  #2  
July 5th, 2013, 09:43 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,292
You definitely belong here. The more the merrier I say!! I am so sorry about your loss. It makes pregnancy so much more worrisome and hard.

I'm 6 weeks pregnant also so I know completely what you are going through right now. and I don't have my first ultrasound until July 17 so that is really hard. I just keep telling myself that everything is going to be fine. Plus I have terrible nausea that last all day long so that helps to reassure me. I'm also 39 so I understand that too. It's harder being older and pregnant, more to worry about.

Please hang around we would love for you to stay. And please let us know how your ultrasound goes.
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  #3  
July 5th, 2013, 09:57 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: The Sunshine State
Posts: 269
LOL Melissa. I think it was you who invited me here.
Thanks, btw. It seems like a great group!
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  #4  
July 5th, 2013, 10:23 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,292
I was thinking that it was me but I couldn't remember for sure..lol. Please stick around.
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  #5  
July 5th, 2013, 12:49 PM
Ame C's Avatar Every breath is a gift.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 3,761
Welcome sweetie
I think that women who have gone through the heartaches that we have would all agree that there are fears and anxieties with pregnancy that we try to push away, but are always in the back of our mind because we have been there and it's horrifying!! So it's totally normal to feel those feelings. I'm 13 weeks today, 25 years old, and although I have my excited moments I'm still pretty numb to this pregnancy. I'm enjoying it, but at the same time allowing myself to understand anything can happen at any time. With my first pregnancy I never in a million years thought that I would lose my baby as far along as we were. I thought for sure if something bad DID happen that there would be machines and medicines to keep him alive. I didn't realize how little control we really had. I lost my son at 38 weeks for reasons unknown. It's very hard not knowing why, and in the back of my mind knowing anything is possible and what if it happens again?? The anxiety is something that I think we all have to live with, but we can't let it control our life and feelings. Try to allow yourself to enjoy each and every moment as much as you can for as long as you can. ((hugs)) I think/hope you will feel much relief when you see your little bean on u/s.

Good luck sweetie, wishing you a very happy and very healthy 9 months! I can't wait to get to know you better
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  #6  
July 5th, 2013, 06:47 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,115
Hi Stacey and welcome
Anxiety is a terrible thing. Ive had two losses and with this preg the anxiety loves showing its little face. Yet somehow, with one moment at a time- I am making it.

I hope you get some reassurance this coming Wednesday. Good luck.
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  #7  
July 5th, 2013, 09:29 PM
momof8lopez's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: illinois
Posts: 8,349
Welcome and congrats on your pregnancy! Im Lori, and I have 7 living children and I'm currently pregnant with my 14th pregnancy. Although my last 3 babys were born nice and healthy, the were conceived after 3 back to back loss's. I had some other loss's earlier in my child bearing years, but these were the hardest on me. Early pregnancy anxiety after any loss is why we are all here. Some of us never loose the anxiety, no matter how far along we are, and some do better after their milestones have been reached. Were glad your here and look forward to sharing your journey!
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  #8  
July 7th, 2013, 08:18 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: The Sunshine State
Posts: 269
Thanks for all the welcomes. I am sorry any of us have to be here in a group like this, but sooooo thankful that it is here for us to fellowship in.
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  #9  
July 8th, 2013, 12:29 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Delaware (the state!)
Posts: 7,343
Welcome and congrats! I think all of the above have said it very well! The anxiety doesn't go away, for me, until I get past that 1st trimester. I've had 2 losses, one before each healthy pregnancy. I hate that we all have to be here, but at least we are here for each other
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  #10  
July 8th, 2013, 12:39 PM
L-SBB's Avatar Bébé Cowgirl
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,810
Hi Stacey, welcome to the group...this is my 6th pregnancy and will be my 2nd (knock on wood) and last child, so I totally understand the anxiety - mine has been so severe throughout this pregnancy I continue to think about seeing a therapist about it. I'm glad you found us, it's a great group of women and def. a different level of understanding than a DDC can provide when you need some extra support (((HUGS)))
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  #11  
July 9th, 2013, 08:25 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 6,635
Of course you belong here! I'm sorry that you have had those previous losses, it makes a new pregnancy so hard to enjoy, doesn't it? I hope that all goes well for you and wish you all the best with this new pregnancy. I know you will find lots of support and caring here.
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  #12  
July 9th, 2013, 08:45 AM
Pitridge's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Sunny California
Posts: 10,074
I agree, I think for sure you belong here. Sorry for your looses, I think we all understand. Anxiety is always one of our worse enemies, when you are pg after a lost, it doesn't go away. I hope you even if the anxiety doesn't go away, you can come here and talk about it, the support system here is great.
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