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The panic strikes again...


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  • 1 Post By jumpingoffplace

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  #1  
January 20th, 2014, 04:55 PM
jumpingoffplace's Avatar Love the life you live.
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: VT, USA
Posts: 431
There have been 3 losses in my ddc in the past few days- all found on u/s where the little one had stopped growing. I have my first u/s tomorrow morning and I'm terrified that I'm going to hear the same thing. I know I'm probably being irrational but I'm TERRIFIED.

I feel badly about posting this in the ddc because there is so much sadness, but I know all of you will understand... *sigh*
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~Jess

Proud mom of 2 beautiful children (and one on the way!), Desiree (3) and Austen (2). Desiree has autism but that just adds to her sparkle.

06/2007 10/2008 ~Gone but not forgotten.~

Software engineering consultant and state autism advocate.


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  #2  
January 20th, 2014, 05:08 PM
Ame C's Avatar Every breath is a gift.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 3,692
Saying a little prayer for you.
I hope you have a great appointment and the paranoia melts away as you enjoy your pregnancy.
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  #3  
January 20th, 2014, 05:09 PM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In yonder mountains
Posts: 9,339
For a mom with loss to have worries about the first ultrasound, it is DEFINITELY not irrational. For me, it is the hardest, most nerve wracking thing there is. I hope and pray that you and baby are perfect tomorrow and baby has a strong heartbeat. We are always here for you. This is the perfect place to post something like this because we know the fears.
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  #4  
January 20th, 2014, 05:15 PM
Schofield06's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Missouri
Posts: 2,364
I think I will always be terrified of that first appointment. That's when both of my missed miscarriages were discovered. I wish you the best at your appointment!

I don't think you're being irrational. You will probably be fine, but those fears are there for a reason. Seeing other losses in your DDC makes it worse, I think. It does for me. Good luck in the morning! I hope you get the best news!
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  #5  
January 20th, 2014, 06:18 PM
jumpingoffplace's Avatar Love the life you live.
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: VT, USA
Posts: 431
Thank you for not making me feel silly. I knew you would understand that's why I came here. I had my first appt with my OB- she did the "usual" and said that everything seemed right on track. I requested the ultrasound. When I did she said she was going to mention it because of my history. I'm scared. Even though I'm only 9 weeks along I've already fallen in love with this surprise blessing. Neither of my losses were missed miscarriages. I was quite literally fine one minute and then overcome with pain/bleeding- and they both happened before I got this far. I keep rationalizing in my head that everything is fine... but that doesn't take the fear away. I'm sure my raging pregnancy hormones aren't helping...

I appreciate the support. You ladies are wonderful. Thank you.
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~Jess

Proud mom of 2 beautiful children (and one on the way!), Desiree (3) and Austen (2). Desiree has autism but that just adds to her sparkle.

06/2007 10/2008 ~Gone but not forgotten.~

Software engineering consultant and state autism advocate.


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  #6  
January 20th, 2014, 07:14 PM
Boos Moo's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 3,959
Hugs sweetie. We totally get where you are coming from.
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  #7  
January 21st, 2014, 05:27 AM
lelila's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 2,895
We have all been in that position, some more than once. The fear, the panic. Unfortunately, each appt. each U/S brings it on. I still walk into the OB office shaking and crying, even this far along.

Your fears are completely normal and I hope you get the best of news at your appt. PAL is so hard. Don't be a stranger here, you're in good company here - the ladies here are awesome! Let us know how your appt went!
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  #8  
January 21st, 2014, 05:52 AM
Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,847
I hope you have a great appointment today! Let us know how it goes!
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  #9  
January 21st, 2014, 06:16 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 14,167
Good Luck at your appointment. I'm praying that you see that beautiful little bean with a beating heart squirming around in there. i completely understand your fears. I had a missed miscarriage and I think that first ultrasound has always been the hardest for me since that happened.

let us know how your appointment goes.
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  #10  
January 21st, 2014, 06:43 AM
Just keep breathing.
Join Date: Sep 2012
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I'm thinking of you this morning- completely understand how scary and stressful it is. Keep us updated.
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  #11  
January 21st, 2014, 08:14 AM
jumpingoffplace's Avatar Love the life you live.
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: VT, USA
Posts: 431
Thank you all. I am soooo relieved to report that baby is doing great! *phew* I absolutely fell in love...
smsturner likes this.
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~Jess

Proud mom of 2 beautiful children (and one on the way!), Desiree (3) and Austen (2). Desiree has autism but that just adds to her sparkle.

06/2007 10/2008 ~Gone but not forgotten.~

Software engineering consultant and state autism advocate.


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  #12  
January 21st, 2014, 01:26 PM
momology's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 6,294
I am in your DDC and I have been feeling the same way. I was so excited to see your update earlier that your appointment went well.
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Expecting our first baby August 25th, 2014!!!


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  #13  
January 22nd, 2014, 04:45 AM
..Michelle..'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Central Illinois
Posts: 1,298
I'm in the September 2014 DDC and we've had 3 ladies leave already due to no H/B, measuring small and the other ones had an ectopic pregnancy and the baby ruptured her tube and had no choice but to lose tube and baby
I go in for my first U/S on Feb 4th and I'm in a panic as well. This is so stressful! Especially being after pregnant after loss!!
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