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What are you doing with siblings during delivery?


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

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  • 1 Post By Danielle80

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  #1  
January 27th, 2014, 05:29 AM
lelila's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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What is your plan for your other children during delivery?

DS will be 8, and it is my sincere WISH that we can have him at the hospital during delivery. My family lives very far away and I would like to avoid my MIL knowing we are at the hospital for at least that day. So what do we do with DS while I deliver? He can't wait alone, especially if we are there for hours.
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  #2  
January 27th, 2014, 05:52 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Why don't you ask the hospital if he could stay in the room with you? Would he be scared or grossed out or do you think he'd like to be there? You could always get him a movie and headphones so he'd be busy with that while you labor. Plus, he'd get to see the baby right after it was born, which I bet would thrill him.
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  #3  
January 27th, 2014, 05:57 AM
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Do you have any close friends or co-workers that you trust?

We will be leaving my daughter with my parents, worse case scenario, my husband will not stay with me at the hospital so he can be home with her if for some reason my parents can't watch her.

Too bad hospitals don't have childcare facilities for this reason!
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  #4  
January 27th, 2014, 06:51 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thankfully my mother in law is going to watch our boys. She does live about an hour away though so if I go into labor in the middle of the night we will have to take them with us until she can get there to take care of them. I did talk to my dr about this and he said that a nurse could help us with them until she got there. They are way too young and if I'm in alot of pain I really don't want them there to see all that.

I'm hoping that my labor starts in the middle of the day while they are at daycare. It will be much easier that way.
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  #5  
January 27th, 2014, 06:57 AM
smsturner's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Mine are going to be at the hospital... but mine are older than 8. There is a family lounge and they are good with letting marcus sit with his laptop and snacks for however long. Megan wants to be in the room, but I'm thinking she'll go back and forth between room and lounge. Also, I had my babies in 3 hours and 5 hours. SO it's not going to be a terribly long wait for them.

I'm not sure how I'd feel about an 8 year old in the lounge. Are your labors short or long? If the room was in a spot where you felt safe, is it close enough that hubby can look in on him every little bit? Your hospital also might have rules about them being left unattended below a certain age.
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  #6  
January 27th, 2014, 07:25 AM
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With Reagan, my MIL helped us out. I was induced with Addy, so we knew we would be going bright and early so she took her to daycare and picked her up for us. But, Reagan was only 3 when I had Addy, so there would have been no way I would have left her anywhere by herself. For an 8 year old, I would ask the hospital what they allow. If DH will be at the hospital with you, maybe he can sit in the lounge or if he is well behaved and patient enough, near the nurse's station?
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  #7  
January 27th, 2014, 06:17 PM
lelila's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thanks for the info ladies. I will call the hospital to see what their policy is. DS is a very well behaved child and can be trusted to sit near a nurses station with his video game/movie. But I don't feel comfortable leaving him on his own in a lounge. I have no idea how long this delivery will be. DS was born via csec and we haven't talked about a birth plan for this baby yet, so who knows how long things will take.

My MIL lives around the corner from us, but she is a psycho and I really don't want her to know I'm delivering. She will come to the hospital and try to take the baby from me. She did it with DS. So I will avoid involving her at all costs.
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  #8  
January 27th, 2014, 07:09 PM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
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We are dropping DD off at a friend's house if it is an early morning induction or natural labor during the day. If it is at midnight, I have no clue. None, what so ever. DH might take me to the hospital with DD and then go back home and get updates from the nurses, I have no clue. I am not opposed to having DH gone during my labor and delivery. With DD, I went into labor around midnight and didn't have her until 3:46 pm. Does your son have a friend he could stay with for a day?
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  #9  
January 27th, 2014, 09:18 PM
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My DD will stay with my in laws. They live 2 minutes away from the hospital so morning, noon or middle of the night we will just call them and say the baby is coming. Well drop her off and head over. SUPER easy for us. I'm grateful.

I hope you figure something out for you guys!
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  #10  
January 28th, 2014, 12:19 AM
Danielle80's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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My oldest will watch our kids! She is wonderful and CPR trained. I would love to have her in the room with me because I think it would be a neat, since she does want to be a dr but she might be grossed out so I think babysitting duty would be best.

When I had my 3rd one of the hospitals had this grandparents program where volunteer (older people) would come to the hospital and help out with kids who's parents or siblings were in the hospital. It was wonderful.
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  #11  
January 28th, 2014, 01:30 AM
..Michelle..'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I don't have any Earthly children yet so that's not an issue for us. Just sending good vibes your way on getting something figured out for your DS!
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  #12  
January 28th, 2014, 05:15 AM
smsturner's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Danielle80 View Post
My oldest will watch our kids! She is wonderful and CPR trained. I would love to have her in the room with me because I think it would be a neat, since she does want to be a dr but she might be grossed out so I think babysitting duty would be best.
I love having my oldest be mature and able to be there too! Mine is 14. She's so good. If she didn't want to be around for the birth, I'd have her stay home with Marcus too. She REALLY wants to be there though. I was totally against it, until some ladies from my ddc told me some stories that talked me into it. One had been at her sister's birth when she was a teen, and said it made a really great experience for her. Another had her kids at her birth and loved how much it made a family. A good test was watching a birth video with her. I have no doubts that she'll be fine with the grossness. She wants to be a dr too
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  #13  
January 28th, 2014, 09:53 AM
MoonAngel702's Avatar ~Staying Positive~
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That's a tough one, Leia! I hope the hospital will work with you so you don't have to tell your MIL. KUP!
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  #14  
January 28th, 2014, 05:58 PM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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No clue. My dad is the closest at 1.5 hours away. If it's a scheduled c-section we'll be ok but if I go into labor and he's that far I honestly don't know, if it's the middle of the night we'd probably ask our neighbors to come over and watch Sean, hopefully a friend can take him if it's during the day.
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  #15  
January 29th, 2014, 02:35 AM
Boos Moo's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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We still don't know if I have to have a repeat c/s or if I can go vbac. A c/s would be easier for scheduling, but I want a vbac. That said, at this point we're still not set as to what we're doing. One option is a friend said she could come help out (she lives in Oregon I'm in so. Cal), but I'm beginning to think it's not going to happen as she hasn't said anything more and I don't want to pressure her into feeling like she HAS to come. Another option is to have DH take DD my 'sister's' house (not biological, just know each other since we were teens, and the only ones we and DD feel comfortable leaving her for a long stretch like overnight). But she lives 2 hours away and DD wouldn't get to see her baby sister for the first day or two (still need to talk to DD about that). Third option is having DS take some time off work (I want DH with me at the hospital as much as possible, especially if it's a c/s), which I'd hate to ask him to do, even though I know he would. Last option is having DD go spend the day at a friends house and then having DH and DS split time home with her at night (DS has to leave for work at 2:30 am) and then DH and DD come to the hospital until DS gets home from work and can pick her up.
So yea - basically we're not for sure yet - gotta get on that.
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