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  #1  
May 20th, 2005, 07:54 PM
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Join Date: May 2005
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2
Hello Ladies! I have included a bit of my recent pregnancy history first. I thought it was necessary before I ask for advice. It's rather lengthy. I hope you can read through it.

I'm new here. I have SEARCHING the internet since my pregnancy ended very early a couple weeks ago. I find myself seeking out people who have experienced this so I can just feel normal and relate to someone. At this point in my life, I have many pregnant friends and they are having successful pregnancies. I pray that I will have that soon. I'm 29, married for 3 years, and ready to start a family. My husband and I found out I was pregnant on May 1st. About 15 years ago, I had a baby at 24 weeks and she only survived 9 hours. I was a pregnant teen and probably not meant to have a child. When my husband I discovered a positive PT a couple weeks ago, we were anxious to see the doctor because of my prior pregnancy. I should tell you that I took 4 tests and they were all very "light" positives. I had early symptoms - sore breasts and tiredness. I thought everything would be okay. Two days after we got our positive, I felt like my pregnancy symptoms were going away. I figured I was about 5 weeks at that point (very early). The next day we had our first "prenatal appointment". The night before I had terrible dreams of going to the doctor and her saying, "you aren't pregnant." Well, it wasn't exactly like that, but when the nurse saw two very light positives, she was concerned. She called in the nurse prac. (who was very insensitive). She basically said that this was so common and this is probably a "chemical pregnancy" and that they would do a blood test because I was there, but if I didn't test so early and see the positive, I would probably never even know I was pregnant. Needless to say, it was difficult. It was very early, but my husband I had gone through the excitement, celebration, etc. of finding out I was pregnant. To us, it was real and we saw a future before us. She said that I may start bleeding or this could be fine - wishy washy. They had to take blood to get my hcg count, but that wouldn't give them much info. They needed to see that it was increasing by taking more blood days later. So I had some waiting to do. I still had hope. The next day I started to spot and then bleed. It was never heavy bleeding (must have been because I was so early). There was minor cramping and back pain, like a period. My first hcg number was 27 (very low - they said it should have been 5000-10,000), then 6, then -6. It took a period of 7 days to conclude all of it. I guess it was one of those early miscarriages (sometimes called a chemical pregnancy) that many people have without knowing they are even pregnant. I just happened to be SO anxious and test as early as possible. I've been doing a lot of reading and I realize how common it is.

I feel fine. We have hopeful spirits. I had to buy a baby gift at Babies R Us the other day. I thought I was okay, but I found myself bawling through the store. It was weird.

The hardest part for me is not having control over the calendar. What I mean is...I have been counting out days and monitoring my menstrual cycle for months in preparation for this. It is so difficult to give up the control now. I don't know when to expect a period, when I'm ovulating, etc. I was so careful and organized with it. We got pregnant on the FIRST try. Now I'm lost. I know it will happen when God intends, but I'm feeling helpless in the whole process.

I took two ovulation tests on Wed and Thurs. this week. They were both positive. I don't understand how that can be. Do you think that they are accurate? I'm just confused. Does anyone have any experience with this whole "chemical pregnancy" thing? Have you had something similiar? Any insight?

Thanks for reading all the way through this. I would love to hear from anyone who can relate or offer advice/wisdom. You seem like a great group. Thanks! ~Dawn
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Dawn 29
Married 3 years
First Grade Teacher
Ohio
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  #2  
May 21st, 2005, 01:40 AM
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 3,842
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first I want to say I am so sorry for your loss. You are not alone in what you are feeling and what you are going through. We have all either been there or are going through it now. I lost my baby a year ago this June. This baby will be born 3 days before I found out the last baby had no heartbeat. Its an emotional roller coaster and there are days I still want to cry about it even though its been a year and I have a baby on the way. I don't think its something ever really forget or "get over".

Its hard to say if you had a chemical pregnancy or not or exactly what happened. A chemical pregnancy is when the egg is fertilized but does not implant. Its still considered a miscarriage regardless and at this point there is no way to know exactly what happened.

That first cycle after a m/c can be very messed up. You may very well be ovulating, once all the bleeding stopped for me I did. But you may just want to wait until after your next period before you get into temping and tracking again. It may not be a normal period either, so don't be surprised. My cramping was much worse than normal and it seems like it lasted longer than usual. It can also do the exact opposite. You will have control over the calendar again soon, but for this month you might want to just wait a bit. You were pregnant even though it wasn't for long and your body will have a little healing to do, so your cycle will probalby be a little off.

I'm sorry that nurse was so insensitive. Some of them get irate because they think we test too early. But it is still very much a loss to us and no excuse for her behavior. Early miscarriages are much more common than I ever knew. My doc told me somewhere around 35% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage, most of them very early.

Know the emotions you are feeling are normal and I hope you get pregnant again very, very soon. Lots of baby dust to you.
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  #3  
May 21st, 2005, 06:21 AM
Regular
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2
Quote:
Originally posted by linda11567@May 21 2005, 03:40 AM
first I want to say I am so sorry for your loss. You are not alone in what you are feeling and what you are going through. We have all either been there or are going through it now. I lost my baby a year ago this June. This baby will be born 3 days before I found out the last baby had no heartbeat. Its an emotional roller coaster and there are days I still want to cry about it even though its been a year and I have a baby on the way. I don't think its something ever really forget or "get over".

Its hard to say if you had a chemical pregnancy or not or exactly what happened. A chemical pregnancy is when the egg is fertilized but does not implant. Its still considered a miscarriage regardless and at this point there is no way to know exactly what happened.

That first cycle after a m/c can be very messed up. You may very well be ovulating, once all the bleeding stopped for me I did. But you may just want to wait until after your next period before you get into temping and tracking again. It may not be a normal period either, so don't be surprised. My cramping was much worse than normal and it seems like it lasted longer than usual. It can also do the exact opposite. You will have control over the calendar again soon, but for this month you might want to just wait a bit. You were pregnant even though it wasn't for long and your body will have a little healing to do, so your cycle will probalby be a little off.

I'm sorry that nurse was so insensitive. Some of them get irate because they think we test too early. But it is still very much a loss to us and no excuse for her behavior. Early miscarriages are much more common than I ever knew. My doc told me somewhere around 35% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage, most of them very early.

Know the emotions you are feeling are normal and I hope you get pregnant again very, very soon. Lots of baby dust to you.
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Thank you so much for your kind words. My husband and I are going to wait until the next cycle. I am grateful that I found this message board. I feel like I have somewhere to go now when I want to share feelings, help someone else, or feel normal! I appreciate your support. Good luck to you. I see you are due very soon. I can't wait to hear all about it! ~Dawn
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Dawn 29
Married 3 years
First Grade Teacher
Ohio
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  #4  
May 23rd, 2005, 06:36 AM
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 28
I am so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks, but the baby had stopped growing at 5 1/2 weeks. My dr said to wait at least until the next cycle and then we could start trying again. He gave me a prescription for progesterone to take the next time I got pregnant. We got pregnant right away. I pretty much knew when I ovulate because I went through 16mos of trying w/ my 1st child and lots of charting, ovulation tests, reproductive specialist tests. Because of the miscarriage and the difficult time getting pregnant the 1st time, I made an appointment w/ one of the midwives that I knew was good to just talk and ask questions. It made me feel so much better. I am still worried every single day about this pregnancy because of the miscarriage, but I try to take comfort in knowing that I am doing everything I can to have a healthy baby.
I wish you the best of luck.
Keri
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