Log In Sign Up

still scared


Forum: Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Pregnancy and Motherhood After Loss LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
March 13th, 2007, 03:41 PM
my_boys_are_my_joy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Bayou state
Posts: 6,431
Hi ladies. My first pregnancy ended in m/c. I immediately (same month) got pg with my baby boy and had a perfectly normal pregnancy and healthy baby. Now I'm pregnant again and I'm still scared. I'm scared of going through another loss. This pregnancy just feels more like the first one than the one I had with my son. I'm not nervous or stressed about it, just feeling detached from this pregnancy. I'm not letting myself get excited yet. We're not planning on telling our families until a few weeks into the 2nd trimester.

Is it normal to be having these feelings--even though I've already had a healthy baby since my m/c?
__________________


a huge thank-you to Mom2*Lauryn*Jacob* for my gorgeous siggy!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
March 13th, 2007, 03:54 PM
Can'tWait2BAMommy's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 810
I think its perfectly normal and I don't know if the "scared" feeling will ever go away! I am wishing you a H&H 9 months hun!
__________________
~Stefanie


Reply With Quote
  #3  
March 13th, 2007, 04:15 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
There are 3 OBs at the clinic I go to. One of them, like me, lost his first full-term, for indiscernible reasons. He told me that he and his wife originally wanted a large family (6 children). However, after their third, she decided that being pregnant was too much stress and they stopped.

He told me that every pregnancy I have will be stressful, even after having a healthy child.



While yours loss was much earlier than mine, I feel that stands true for every woman who experiences a loss during pregnancy. It's sort of a stab at the vital part of your femininity. Part of being a woman is nurturing and protecting those who depend on us for life. When, even though it's NOT any fault of ours, that life ends, it takes something out of us. We lost self confidence, I think. We will always think, "Yes, but what if..."


I'm glad you are having a little peace with this pregnancy. I did early on too, and do now most days, although nearing my third trimester and my loss point is making me more scared.




Oh, and congrats on your pregnancy!
__________________
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog


Reply With Quote
  #4  
March 13th, 2007, 08:24 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,619
I think it's totally normal to be scared hun... I know I was worried during my entire pregnancy with my daughter & i'm sure that my next pregnancy i'll be the same
__________________






Reply With Quote
  #5  
March 14th, 2007, 05:51 AM
lauraec20's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,369
I think that it is perfectly normal. I found myself doing the same thing - not wanting to get to exciting or attached to the pregnancy for fear that something will happen. It is something that I am struggling with. I am hoping that when we get past 16 weeks it will be better, but I don't know. I have found that this board is very helpful to just be able to talk about how you are feeling.

Hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy!!
__________________
Laura
Reply With Quote
  #6  
March 14th, 2007, 06:57 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10,732
Like the other ladies said, it's completely normal. Once you've experienced loss, that feeling will stick with you and affect the way you handle future pregnancies. It's part of your natural mental defense "just in case" something happens again. Hoping this pg goes smoothly for you!
__________________
Do not sorrow; the joy of the Lord is your strength." Neh. 8:10
Reply With Quote
  #7  
March 14th, 2007, 08:25 AM
cassiek's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: WI
Posts: 3,803
I think that its normal to feel that way. I wish you a happy and healthy nine months.
__________________



Reply With Quote
  #8  
March 14th, 2007, 07:22 PM
my_boys_are_my_joy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Bayou state
Posts: 6,431
thank you all for your kind words of encouragement.
__________________


a huge thank-you to Mom2*Lauryn*Jacob* for my gorgeous siggy!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
March 16th, 2007, 07:18 PM
Spotis's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 4,926
I too think it's normal to feel that way. I know I held back, didn't want to get too excited...constantly reminding myself that something could go wrong. Then I would stress that I wasn't excited enough about this pregnancy and maybe that was because it was my intuition telling me that something was wrong with the baby. As you can see, it's a downward spiral of stress. I finally resolved myself to "I'm not going to let stress dictate this pregnancy." I believe stress was partly responsible for my m/c, so I've been doing everything in my power to avoid stress during this pregnancy. I refuse to weigh myself...I got a facial at an expensive spa (something I never do)....and so on. It does get easier and eventually you will start okay about enjoying your pregnancy. Congratulations and here's to a happy and healthy 9 months
__________________

Nolan John turns 2 on 8/28/09
Thank you Jessica for the siggy!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:47 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0