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THe biggest impact


Cesarean Section Grief

A board for members whose cesarean section experience was not a positive one.

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  #1  
May 10th, 2010, 12:04 PM
NutMeg76's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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What do you feel is the biggest impact your cesarean had had on you?
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  #2  
May 10th, 2010, 12:23 PM
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Oh, the PTSD for sure! I was soooo angry! I seriously didn't care a lick about my son for at least 6 months. I thought my DH was a horrible person and I wanted a divorce. Looking back, he was amazing through it all! I suffered with it for 2 years.

You know those sweet pictures you see of Moms and their babies? You know, where they're kissing their feet, or some other tender moment? Well, my Mom was with me once when I was getting DS2's pics done. The photographer wanted me to do one of those poses. My Mom had to drag me over there and practically force me to do it. There was just no connection to him with me. She said that every time she would visit, she would pick him up (because you can bet that I wasn't holding him) and love on him as much as she could. (Holy cow, I'm crying about this! Guess it still gets to me that I treated him that way) I see pictures of him now when he was a baby, and I don't remember any of it.

It wasn't until my DH pointed out that maybe I felt bad because I had another cesarean that a light popped on. That was the moment I was able to look back and start making steps towards recovery. To start to forgive myself for the choice I made.

Anyway, I wont go on more. But, yeah...that has impacted me more than anything physical that occurred during the cesarean.
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  #3  
May 10th, 2010, 01:59 PM
flitabout's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It's amazing you know they are yours but you just don't care. I didn't much care for DD2, until she was almost 2. I remember it I just don't connect to it. Funny part is she was a 100% planned baby. She was 2 hours old when I saw her for the first time. I think that was just the start of the problems I had with her. God Knows we sure had plenty.
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  #4  
May 10th, 2010, 02:10 PM
TheOtherMichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm not sure. I am unable to trust birth, and for someone who feels called to work with fertility and/or maternity care that has had a huge impact. I get shaky sometimes when watching a birth like mine on tv or knowing a friend is in labor. I also have a lot of anger because of the way I was treated during and after.
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  #5  
May 10th, 2010, 03:18 PM
flitabout's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Like when you have not only the doctors but the nurses taking their personal frustrations out on a scared first time mom rather than to give them any kind of support?
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  #6  
May 10th, 2010, 03:59 PM
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DS2 was very planned as well. We got pregnant with him on our first cycle trying. I got to hold him ON the operating table. I fought my drugs to get out of the recovery room as fast as possible so I could get into the PP room and get him. He was wanted like crazy....but when the depression and traumatic stress syndrome kicked in, none of that mattered.
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  #7  
May 10th, 2010, 06:48 PM
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Feeling as though I lost the chance to 'bond' with DD. We had to depend on DH and my parents for everything for the first few weeks that she was here. In the week between the time I was induced and Thanksgiving, I had an emergency c/s due to the epidural stopping my breathing, a blood patch for spinal headaches, required medication for high blood pressure and felt as though I was a complete failure as a mom because I couldn't bf due to the trauma my body had been through. Hope what I wrote makes some sense because the feelings are still jumbled up at times.
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  #8  
May 12th, 2010, 11:58 AM
WhoaMomma!'s Avatar Danielle
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Location: Northern Virginia
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I think for me the biggest impact was on my marriage. I blamed my husband for my cesarean. I kept telling myself that if I had not let them induce me, it wouldn't have ended like that. And HE was the reason I didn't refuse the induction. In retrospect I think that was just the only way I could deal with it. I felt like I had been assaulted and it was his job to protect me, and he failed me. We are only just now starting to work it out and there are days 9 months later when I'm not 100% certain we will make it.
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  #9  
May 27th, 2010, 10:14 AM
Sk8ermaiden's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Losing the first precious days with her for arbitrary reasons. 5 days for NO reason.

That every future birth will be a battle.
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  #10  
May 29th, 2010, 08:33 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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That it will impact the number of children I can safely have in the future.

I also think I'm battling a bit of PPD/PTSD this time around, but I'm not ready to go into details here.
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