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Cesarean Section Grief

A board for members whose cesarean section experience was not a positive one.

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  #21  
November 30th, 2010, 03:54 PM
josie_24's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 2,483
I just came on here due to having some issues coming up with my section. I understand the picture, I get it and I think it accurately depicts how some women feel. I feel blessed that I had a doctor that let me do ALL I could to have a natural birth, but heart rate of 60 and not engaging in the pelvis after 30 hours, I guess I really needed it. BUT I will always second guess.

What part I really do "get" of this is the "at least you have a healthy baby". I swear if I heard that ONE MORE TIME after my section I was going to SCREAM. My friends and support here all "got it" and gave me condolences for my c section IMMEDIATELY. Other friends and family that aren't in my "circle" just blew off my sadness about my section...which is why I feel this picture depicts how some women feel...when you get blown off like that and they act like the fact that you should NOT be sad...
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  #22  
January 7th, 2011, 12:18 PM
Melissa
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Indiana
Posts: 341
Insulting
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  #23  
March 9th, 2011, 11:13 AM
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 10
Very thought provoking image.

Cut up, mutilated. That's how I feel. I feel like a failure to be honest. However, i'm determined to be positive about my next birth.

xxx
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  #24  
April 16th, 2011, 09:02 PM
Veteran
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 149
I find it insulting because it's down-playing the fact that I (or whomever else) have a healthy baby. There is no "at least" to it. If they had to cut me a thousand times to get my healthy baby out safely, then it's worth it.
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  #25  
April 30th, 2011, 07:52 AM
WhoaMomma!'s Avatar Danielle
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 8,446
The tag line is sarcastic. It's a quote that women with any kind of birth trauma hear over and over and over again. It's even codified in our legal system, since most lawyers will not pursue a malpractice case unless the baby was injured or died. All of these people make women with birth trauma feel like their emotions, their mental health, and their bodily integrity don't matter. I don't expect every woman who looks at that picture to have the same reaction. No piece of art evokes the same reaction in everyone. I think it's perfectly fine to say "i find it insulting because the artist is implying that i am mutilated, and i don't feel that way"

But don't tell me that I don't get to feel mutilated. And certainly don't tell me that I should be grateful that I have a healthy baby and not care about the egregious assault that was perpetrated against me. Until you've walked in my shoes, you don't know anything about how I should or do feel.
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  #26  
May 7th, 2011, 09:27 PM
~*3 little bears*~'s Avatar Jack~Mack~Brooke~Baby
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Posts: 5,666
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I don't like the photo at all BUT I completely agree with the sarcasm directed to that incredibly insensitive statement of "at least you have a healthy baby" there is a link that I feel addresses that sentiment very well...I will try to find it but basically it makes the assumption that we don't care about the fact that our baby is healthy and safe and it also implies that we dontt have the right to feel disappointment, anger, frustration, etc toward our birth experience because somehow it means that I feel those things toward my baby. In that regard I think the photo is suitable for the message it is trying to convey. And I don't know if any of you have ever watched a c/section but they are not gentle with your body and it does kind of come across like mutilation with all the yanking and pushing and seemingly careless displacement of internal organs. I personally wouldn't use the word mutilated to describe my body after c/s only because I can still have normal pregnancies and had decent recoveries with no lasting pain or numbness but that also doesn't mean that i wouldn't totally understand why some women do in fact feel mutilated.
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