Log In Sign Up

Valerie's Blog


Forum: Southern Mommies

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Southern Mommies LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #21  
December 18th, 2008, 05:26 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Man has life changed! Quick update:
Will is now almost 6 weeks old and we are having issues. I don't know if it's colic, acid reflux, or something else, but basically if he isn't eating or sleeping he is wanting to be held all the time. Sometimes he will cry if you aren't moving. THis is very hard for me bc I have pretty much been ignoring Troy and he's not handling this well. As most toddlers, he's starting to do anything and everything to get attention--even negative attention. I know it will get better. I know Will will be happy one day in a swing, bouncy, wherever and I will be able to help Troy and play with him, but for right now--LIFE IS HARD and I am struggling. I don't know if it's PPD or just normal frustration with a new infant in our life, but I just can't seem to parent 2 children. I feel so guilty for ignoring Troy and then feel so guilty when I finally put Will down and he screams and I just let him, although I know I need the break. I knew this was going to be hard, but I just didn't know how poorly I would handle it I love those 2 boys more than anything and would do anything I could to make them happy and I don't want it to sound otherwise. I don't regret having a second, I just wish I was coping better.
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #22  
December 21st, 2008, 12:46 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Today, Will was much better. More content than I have ever seen him so that's been nice. He had a rougher night, but I have been wondering if we were in a growth spurt. He did sleep until 10:00 this AM so that was a surprise and could have been a huge help. I can usually get one really long nap out of him, but I don't know if that will continue--it's been nice so far. I am still frustrated bc he seems fussiest with me, but I really think he's sensing my stress. Tonight we have a Christmas program and it's later so we'll see how he does!
Troy is still acting a little needy, but I love the weekends when DH is home bc we can each take a child and give them the attention they need. I swear I don't understand how single moms manage
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #23  
January 6th, 2009, 04:51 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Again I have not posted in awhile because I am a broken record--having the same challenges as always and getting frustrated because I can't seem to make any headway! Do you ever feel like you are in a rut or in a vicious cycle??? That's exactly how I feel and I just can't get out. I have had days where I have cried and cried and others where I can just say "Whatever" and know it will get better, but I haven't had any days to really enjoy my new little one Is it bad that I want a day with just him so I can focus on him??? I have time with Troy to play and enjoy him, but I never feel like I can interact with Will without ignoring Troy. I guess I just have to find a balance, but don't know how?? See--a broken record
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #24  
January 13th, 2009, 11:29 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Things are better FINALLY! In some ways anyway. We are slowly but surely figuring each other out but now we have a new issue--he hasn't pooped in 9 days and is in obvious pain It just breaks my heart. The poor little guy has had so many issues since birth and I just wish we could have a week without a call to the ped. Luckily his fussiness is easing and when he's not having belly pain, he is overall much happier and is smiling all the time and "talking", plus he's so close to laughing!!! We have so much to look forward to and I feel like if we could get this pooping issue resolved, we could almost be normal I just love that little guy so much it hurts I would do anything to fix all his problems! Poor Troy though has been so ignored though lately because Will needs more attention, but DH was nice enough to take Will this past weekend so I could just hang with Troy and boy did he need the one on one. He's been a trooper and I have been trying so hard to be more patient and understanding with him and I have noticed a huge change in him (although there is some jealousy). It's so nice to be able to say that things are better!
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #25  
January 21st, 2009, 02:20 PM
IneedCoffee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 10,195
Your family is beautiful Valerie. I am so happy to see your little Will is healthy. Glad you are doing better as well. I miss getting to interact on the Southern Mom's board.
Take care!!

__________________
I Love my

My Blog
Reply With Quote
  #26  
January 26th, 2009, 11:35 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
We miss you too! I hope things are going okay!

Things are continuing to improve daily! It's so nice to have a calmer and happier household again. I no longer dread when DH has to go back to work on Monday and don't feel like I have to go to my Mom's to get her help! It felt like forever, but he's only 11 weeks so it wasn't so bad after all! I just love my boys so much and feel like I can truly enjoy them as well now. I love my 1 on 1 time with each and especially now that Will is getting more active and interactive as well. I know we'll still run into snags, but for now, I can really sit back and enjoy Now, if he'll just start sleeping longer at night.... Can't ask for perfection, right?!?!?
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #27  
January 28th, 2009, 11:45 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
SNAG! I ran into a huge one the past couple of nights with Will's sleeping. He went from sleeping from 7 until like 12-3 and then every 3 hours to waking up almost every 1.5 to 2 hours. I know it's possible time for a growth spurt but it's crazy how much he wakes. Even for naps--he'll wake up after sleeping a short time and just cry and cry. He'll either go back to sleep on his own or I can get him back, but then he just keeps repeating this cycle and it's so hard because I am in and out of his room so much. Sometimes I honestly just take him out of the crib even though I know he's still tired because it's such a hassle to deal with. Hopefully it is the growth spurt and he'll start sleeping better again but I think I have gotten a total of 3-4 hours tops the last two nights each. I am so tired of obsessing about sleep but when you are as tired as me, it's all you can think of some days.
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #28  
February 19th, 2009, 06:31 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Wow--can't believe it's been this long since I last posted! My how time flies!

I realized today just how good of a child Troy is. We really are lucky and of course now that I have posted this, things will change but my sister is having huge problems with my niece and tantrums for not getting her way. She was wondering if it was the age, but honestly, she's only 4.5 months older than Troy and he handles "No" much better. He may complain a little and not like it, but he just goes on. Watching what they had to deal with today with her tantrums made me realize how blessed we are. Of course, this past summer I would have said something different, but it was relatively short lived. He was having huge problems, but we had a lot of change so once we got back to a normal routine, he was back to normal.
As far as Will, we have really gotten into a good pattern--not schedule--and it's working well for us. He's so stinkin cute I can't stand it and sometimes I just can't believe how much I love him I could just hug and kiss him all day!
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #29  
March 12th, 2009, 06:23 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Hmmmmmm, what has happened in this long time since I posted??? Not really sure, but if feels like I have been so busy, doing what?? Not quite sure??? We've been spending a ton of time at my mom's bc she's been watching my niece and nephew alone and likes to have the extra help. It's really not hard, but for some reason, she feels like she can't do it. I think it's more like she doesn't want to, but whatever! I love being around them and it gives Troy someone to play with since he and my niece are only 4 months apart in age (and Will and Antonio or only 3 months apart). I *may* babysit my nephew next year but we're not sure. If I don't babysit him, I think I will take in my friend's newborn. That would be interesting, but I really need the extra money. I am going nuts not having any income at all coming in. I feel so guilty for every thing I buy or if I ever take Troy out to lunch or breakfast It's less than $10, but my DH makes it feel like I took him to a 5 star restaurant) I just miss getting out of the house and there's not a whole lot to do in this town especially when it's cold. He just doesn't understand how stir crazy you can get being in only 1 of 2 places all the time (here or my mom's).
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #30  
March 21st, 2009, 07:29 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
I am quickly realizing that my life is not exciting I really have nothing interesting to say or talk about unless you want to hear about Will's sleeping or eating habits and I honestly am getting tired of obsessing about it. I have come to the conclusion that no one wants to hear it anymore (including me). I just need to learn to function on little sleep. My SIL has done it for years so I guess I need to get pointers from her. She used to get up at 3AM just to have time to herself since she has 4 daughters, homeschools and is involved in a variety of activities. I am not at that point yet, but sometimes I think I may be when Troy starts school or starts activities.Speaking of that, I really want to get him involved in swim lessons. DH thinks we can do it ourselves but having Will probably will make that a challenge. I just worry that when I take them to the pool, Troy will get too comfortable and do something when I am dealing with Will. I just feel like he needs to know the basics just to put my mind at ease. Now if I can only talk DH into it????
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #31  
March 30th, 2009, 11:23 AM
CJBs Mommy's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Suffolk, Va
Posts: 312
Send a message via AIM to CJBs Mommy Send a message via Yahoo to CJBs Mommy
I'm here Valerie if you want to talk... I'd like to help you out on the hosting part if only they'd make me a co host... lol
__________________

Thanks to Momma Trish for this siggy!!!

Reply With Quote
  #32  
April 8th, 2009, 09:53 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Thanks! That means a lot!

Can you say grouchy? No patience? Tired? Grumpy?....that is how I have been lately and it's getting ridiculous. I don't even know why though. DH and I have been grumpy with each other, I have been so hard on Troy and expecting way to much from him and poor Will--well he's just been hard bc of teething. I feel like if I could just get a break for an afternoon--not just to nap, but to do rest, get things done without having to listen for or look after a child...would just help me tremendously. Is that horrible of me? I love my kids, but I haven't gotten much of a break and I am worn out. I did get a nap Saturday but that was because Will had that horrible night. I couldn't even function I was so hard. I feel like I am being very selfish, and my mom will help out for an hour or 2, but that's about it anymore. I think some of it is the fact that DH's hours are longer and he's not here to help at night all the time so from 6 AM until 8 PM I am on baby/toddler duty. I guess that's what happens though when you have kids. Like I said I love them, but I love my time to myself too. SELFISH???
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #33  
April 13th, 2009, 05:56 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Still being selfish but I am getting my way Mom is going to watch the boys tomorrow for a couple hours (would be longer but Will won't take formula very well and I am terrible about pumping so I don't have enough to give her for 2 feeds). The problem now??? I have so much I want to squeeze into the 4 hours that I don't know what should take priority. Of course a lot depends on how Will's night goes. the past 2 nights he's been up every 2.5-3 hours so I may just want to nap and say screw all the projects and errands so we'll see what happens. I am just so excited to have the chance again without feeling so guilty since my mom has no obligation to my sister this week. It won't happen again for awhile so I am going to enjoy every minute! Maybe after this, I can relax and just breathe a bit.
It was actually kinda funny at the beach this past weekend because Will was napping so DH, Troy and DH's sister went out to lunch and to run an errand rather than keep Troy cooped up in the hotel room and I had NOTHING to do--no laundry, cleaning, phone calls....NOTHING. I could just sit and read and have no guilt for doing it! I was so excited because it has been so long since I could do that. Lately, I have been making every excuse to go to my Mom's so that I can just be with Troy and not worry about all the stuff that needs to be done around the house, but (you will see a theme here) guilt always gets me for doing it so it was wonderful to have that opportunity this weekend. As you can see, I have a lot of issues with guilt--I always feel like I should be doing something else
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #34  
April 20th, 2009, 11:49 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
What a fun weekend! It has been hard on Will because there was a lot of stimulation, but I was able to take a walk while my sister hung with Will on Friday AND Saturday. DH let me mow the yard Saturday which I love and we had friends over for dinner Saturday. That was awesome for Troy because they have a 3 year old as well and they played and had a blast. It was a bit late for Troy, but worth it overall. Sunday we took the boys (mainly for Troy of course) to a carnival and Troy was tall enough to ride some more rides which was fun to watch. He decided he wanted to ride this one that went really fast in a circle and I was nervous bc DH gets sick on those types of rides and I love them sooooo we got to see who Troy took after and I am very happy to say------ME!!! We had a blast together so I think I will get my wish and have someone to ride with when we go to Kings Dominion!! I am such a kid when it comes to amusement parks :LOL: I am exhausted though since Will is sleeping even worse (I promise I won't get started). One day, I will get some rest I guess. Regarding Will:
WOW--this kid is just one problem after another--all minor so far thankfully, but he can't catch a break It's either teething, congestion, tummy issues, being exhausted....we started solids at 4 months and he was doing really well for the most part, but now he's so constipated and has tummy issues even after eating prunes. He's also spitting up like crazy. Mom and my sis think I should try soy formula, but I REALLY need to keep breastfeeding bc of the cost. Sometimes I think about weaning since I can't figure out if it's my diet, but I really don't want to. It's just so hard because I will change my diet and nothing changes for him, but when I go back, he seems worse so is it my diet???? I called the ped (AGAIN!) and they want to check him if the spit up and tummy issues don't resolve after a week of no solids. Part of me wants something to be wrong (not serious of course) but then I would know, but of course, the other part of me wants him to be perfect but then I don't get an explanation?? Weird, huh?
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥


Last edited by *Valerie*; April 20th, 2009 at 11:51 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #35  
April 23rd, 2009, 05:55 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
I can't believe this, but I may actually be going to a Mom's Night Out tonight! I missed one opportunity since Will was sick and then the next chance I got, I had to take the boys with me (which was such a challenge). DH is not feeling great, but he keeps telling me to go so we'll see, but I think I will! I have to take care of them when I don't feel great so I think it's fine for him as well. I really need this too. They are the mom's of our playgroup and I really like them, but don't get the chance to just chat when the kids are around for reasons I think most parents understand. The kids play well together but you just always have to keep most of your attention to making sure things don't get too out of hand. Part of me thinks I am crazy since I should just go to bed early since Will keeps me up so much, but the other part of me says, TAKE ADVANTAGE of some time out of the house. It's just so nice to have the chance again. When I became a SAHM, I lost a lot of my friends because they still worked and we just lost touch so having friends that also SAH or at least make efforts to meet up with other moms is soooo nice!
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #36  
April 24th, 2009, 05:22 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
WOW did I need that night out! I felt a little bad leaving DH but headed out anyway and although there were only 3 of us there, it was so nice! We just chatted and ate and chatted and chatted With NO interruptions or having to watch our kids. I felt totally refreshed! Then to top it all off, Will slept from 8:30 until 5 AM!!!! He cried out a couple times, but I always give him 5-10 minutes depending on his cry and he always went back to sleep. I couldn't believe it since he hasn't done that in so long. I didn't sleep well, bc like a dummy didn't pump before bed (bc he's always up before 12) and was in misery all night, but I would just roll over and finally go back to sleep. I feel like a totally different person today--it's simply amazing what a change of pace will do for you. Now I just have when question? When's the next one
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #37  
May 2nd, 2009, 02:09 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
You know why JM rocks??? Because I have had a problem for 6 weeks now and no one I spoke to about it even offered advice or input at all. I finally post about it on JM (breastfeeding problem) and I get tons of replies and advice and may have figured out why I have been having so much pain Bfing. Will is almost 6 months old and I have had horrible pain on my left side and NO ONE even thought it was anything, but I come on JM and now I know that I should probably pursue getting it checked out since it may be thrush. JM Rocks!!! I just had to say that
It is just so nice to have a place to come and talk, chat, vent, whatever. I just wish I could meet some people IRL because I think we could have fun together, but I guess part of what makes this nice is that it is anonymous. I just wish all the people here were honest and didn't use a forum as great as this to cause issues (we are having drama on one of the boards I go to )
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #38  
May 4th, 2009, 11:36 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
What a weekend! I already posted about this in the main forum, but I can't get the visual of watching my poor dog being attacked by another dog. It was one of the scariest things I have ever seen and I felt so completely helpless I just keep thinking about what if...
What if Troy had been there? He would have been devastated and completely traumatized. He loves that dog and gets upset if any other dog even looks at her funny.
What if the dog had come after Will or me??? The woman had another dog on a leash and I have no idea if she could have helped or if the other dog would have attacked as well?
What if Buffy never got the other dog off of her?? The only way the dog was going to stop was if Buffy quit fighting I could go on and on! I am so nervous to take her for a walk again even though this was the first time I had ever seen those dogs.

On a different note, I think I know why Troy has been so whiny for the past few days. Yesterday, DH was hanging with them while I had a baby shower and he suddenly said "Daddy, my throat hurts" and DH checked him and he had a fever. The poor little thing even asked to go to bed last night with no dinner. That's when you KNOW he's sick--he always eats a ton and tries to avoid sleep at all cost. So today I have made him veg out in front of the tv. Whenever he does anything that's active, his head or throat hurts so I am trying to knock this out now.

On an even different note: I think Will and I have thrush and so I am taking him in to the Ped tomorrow and they'll do his six month check up (Yes 6 Months!!! AAUUGGHH) Hopefully this will ease up some of the issues we have been having with his eating problems. I even read that thrush can get into the belly and cause gas and tummy upset. Well, it's been going on for 6 weeks so that could very well be possible.

Yep--all of this found out this weekend Crazy!
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥


Last edited by *Valerie*; May 4th, 2009 at 11:39 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #39  
May 7th, 2009, 01:02 PM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Nope, no thrush and no answers about our issues, so once again, I am just as clueless as ever??? I should be used to this, but I am not. SIGH Poor Will--his eating is just so off and my milk supply is getting off thanks to that. He still cries when he poops even though it's not constipated and I am supposed to get juice in him, but not sure how since he won't drink it?? We'll see what happens bc I am just going to offer it to him all day, pump as much as I can and just deal with it. I am seriously close to weaning, but the cost of formula is so high that I am just not ready to deal with that and what it would mean to his budget. Yes, I know BM is best but for some rea son, Will doesn't respond well to mine and we can't figure out why. Even my ped said that the other day and so has DH, Mom, my sis....I am just going to try and figure things out and leave it in God's hands. My mommy instinct is saying that something is very wrong with his belly though, but no one else seems to think so I should have listened to my dad and become a PA, maybe I would know more
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
  #40  
May 14th, 2009, 11:35 AM
*Valerie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 50,688
Will's eating is tons better but I think it's a growth spurt, but the pooping is the same The ped once again seems to be blowing me off and it's so frustrating. Yes, this may be nothing, but it doesn't seem like nothing to me??? I hate second guessing myself! Oh well, it will work out eventually
So a little embarrassing story:
Took the boys to the drug store today to get some Rx's and Troy did something silly so I said "You are ridiculous". Troy tried to say ridiculous but couldn't say it right so he was getting chuckles from me, the ladies that work there and a younger guy standing next to us. Well, then he kept trying and finally came out with ....







"dickylicky" and just started saying that over and over The guy was hysterical and I just got him out of there. The sad thing is--he can say the stupid word and was totally just being a goofball. Out of the mouths of babes huh!
__________________
♥Thanks you jaidynsmum for my awesome siggy ♥

Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:03 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0