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Bad Mommy Moment #???


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  #1  
May 15th, 2013, 08:42 AM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: SW Ontario, Canada
Posts: 7,024
We all have our bad mommy moments and I know that. Most of the time for me they are I yelled at a kid in public, I gave them sour juice, one of my kids as a baby rolled off the bed on me or I've sent the wrong lunch with the wrong child.

Well I now have the mother of all bad mommy moments. For 6 years I've been on DD1's (she's our 9 yo, this started when she was about 3) case and yelled at her for not listening, not paying attention when someone is talking to her and not responding the first time when she's called. We had a hearing and CAP test done as well as a AER screening. Here's my hang my head in shame moment, she can understand less than 30% of what is being said to her in her left ear, her right ear seems to be fine, but there is an almost 30 sec delay between when we start talking and she starts hearing, we have to back for a second test for this. She's not ignoring me, she can't hear and understand me!! I feel terrible! I really wish I thought to ask to have her tested a long time ago.
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  #2  
May 15th, 2013, 10:21 AM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
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Location: Ontario, Canada
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((hugs)) oh wow, hopefully having this answer now will make a world of difference to her.
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  #3  
May 15th, 2013, 10:57 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,084
My dad is deaf in his left ear, and even knowing that it can be THE most frustrating thing, because it's so easy to forget he can't hear on that side.

Hopefully now that she's been tested you can help her cope a little better with it! Don't beat yourself up over it, you didn't know. Just be glad you figured this out now!
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  #4  
May 15th, 2013, 11:00 AM
Jessimaaka's Avatar Pink in a house of Blue
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 16,273
That's not a bad mommy moment! Its normal kid behaviour so you can't be faulted for not knowing!

Glad she is getting tested though, hope it will make a difference!
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DS1: Cameron 8/12/2012
DS2: Levi 3/30/2014
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  #5  
May 15th, 2013, 11:09 AM
Countrymom4's Avatar Chrystal
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Saskatchewan, Canada
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Don't feel bad We have just went through the same thing with DD#2(she is 7). We tested her ears to find out she CAN hear fine and is just ignoring us
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  #6  
May 15th, 2013, 11:16 AM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: SW Ontario, Canada
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Thanks ladies. I've had so many bad mommy moments with these three kids that I debated actually putting a number in the thread title but that number would have to be something like #365 and that's just embarrassing. Besides this one I feel the worst about. 6 years! I took her to doctors, physiologists, behaviour specialists and pediatricians, but not once did I think to ask to have her hearing tested.

We've gotten a couple of recommendations from the audiologist such as talking to her on the right side in a noisy room and directly in front of her in a quiet room. I have to wait a week to get the written report that I can take to the school and to the end of the month to meet with her new pedi to get more ideas on how to help her. I am glad we ended up with this new pedi though, her old one did nothing for us and only saw us 3 times before discharging us back to our family doc, whereas the first thing this one said to us was to have her hearing tested and wants to meet with us monthly for a bit until we get things sorted out.
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  #7  
May 15th, 2013, 11:21 AM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Countrymom4 View Post
Don't feel bad We have just went through the same thing with DD#2(she is 7). We tested her ears to find out she CAN hear fine and is just ignoring us
This is exactly what I was expecting when our pedi first recommended the hearing and CAP test. When DD1 came out and the audiologist told DH and I that we had to talk I knew I was wrong. Then she started asking us all these "have you noticed" type questions and when we had to answer yes to just about all of them I knew I was really wrong.
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  #8  
May 15th, 2013, 12:16 PM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
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its such a common behavior (ignoring mom and dad) that i would guess the majority of parents would assume the same as you, i know i would. My kids passed their newborn hearing test, so it probably wouldnt cross my mind that they couldnt hear
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  #9  
May 15th, 2013, 01:36 PM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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And apparently she will continue to pass quiet room hearing tests, she can hear sounds in that ear, but not comprehend voices when spoken on that side. Then with the delay lets say the teacher starts out with "Looking at the map on the far wall, we will do......" She may not start hearing until he gets to "we will do..." so then she's trying to play catch up and figure out where she's to get the information for the activity. That makes it appear like she's not paying attention but in reality she has no control over it at all.
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  #10  
May 15th, 2013, 04:34 PM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
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is there anyway to correct that delay for her? i know very little about hearing problems/loss so im not sure what is "fixable"
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  #11  
May 15th, 2013, 05:25 PM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I have no idea! I'm hoping to get more answers once the official report comes in and I get to meet with her pedi. I'm happy to know what's going on with her but completely overwhelmed at the same time.

The audiologist mentioned scribes and personal computers and learning cursive as opposed to printing but all of those are just possible ideas that may help and I have no idea which will show up in the report recommendations or how they will help with hearing. It's all a little confusing.
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  #12  
May 15th, 2013, 05:55 PM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
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i can imagine, that must be a lot of info to take in at once!
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  #13  
May 15th, 2013, 06:33 PM
Jessimaaka's Avatar Pink in a house of Blue
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At least you get to meet with them all and ask questions and such. And I'm sure you can ask followup questions as well.
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DS1: Cameron 8/12/2012
DS2: Levi 3/30/2014
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  #14  
May 15th, 2013, 07:12 PM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh you should see the list of questions DH and I are making! By the end of the month we'll need an hour long apt just to answer them all.
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  #15  
May 16th, 2013, 07:44 AM
2pinks&ablue's Avatar Chantelle
Join Date: May 2007
Location: NB, Canada
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Don't beat yourself up over it! I would assume the same thing, at least you['re heading on the right track now!
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