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My life in measurements


TTCAL Cycle Groups

In Limbo, 6+ months, 2 week wait, 2 week wait to O.

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  #1  
October 3rd, 2009, 08:23 PM
Kary♥RN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I feel like I have been living the over the last year in measurements. Next month it will be a year since my first loss... I am on month 15 of ttc, I have had 3 losses in 11 months, I have had a loss about ever 3.66 months, I have been "pregnant" for over 17 weeks combines. I live my life in 2 wk increments. Sometimes I break those 2wk down... WTH? I have been on this board since Feb. I am one of the last "original" members when I joined. As I filled out the papers for the RE... I had very little to put on it. I look back on the last 11 months.. and think will it take me 11 more? DH says if we can't get answers he dosen't want to do this anymore. He dosen't want to see me go through this again. Well thier is nothing saying that I will not be sitting here typing all the about again.. except 2 years since my first loss... month 30... My life in measurements... is that what I have become?
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  #2  
October 4th, 2009, 06:04 AM
Mega Super Mommy
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Oh hugs Kary. I know exactly how you feel. I sat down and added all my weeks together last month and it made me so depressed. I was thinking the same things you are... I've been on this board since my first loss in Jan and since then I just keep having more losses...It's like I'm always waiting for something - to ovulate, to take an HPT, to see if the baby is alive, to finish miscarrying... then I repeat all over again. It's tiring.

I wish I had some good advice for you, but I don't. I'm trying not to think about the time, but its hard. My birthday is coming up, and its the day we conceived the first one. Its also October 15th. Ironic, no? Was I destined for loss?

I just wanted to give you a hug, and let you know you're not alone. And I really hope we aren't here for another year... that we find answers and have our babies... it's definitely "our time" for a lot of us.
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  #3  
October 4th, 2009, 01:49 PM
Trish36's Avatar Mom of 4
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HUGS! I was just thinking the same thing and it made me so depressed today. I'm still here...counting down the days to O and then counting down the days before I can POAS. And POAS is not as much fun as it used to be. Now even if there is a line I'm terrified that I'll be back here within days. It's like we are stuck living 'groundhog month'. same thing over and over again. sigh! I wish I could make you feel better...heck I wish someone could make me feel better.
Kary...I'm sure you'll figure out soon enough what is going on and you will have your beautiful baby.
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  #4  
October 4th, 2009, 02:46 PM
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KDD KDD is offline
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I often feel like the "oldtimer" on this board. I've been here since my loss in April '08! I totally know what you mean. My life is lived in 2 week partitions. I hate it. I think this past month I've managed to somehow find peace with both the loss and TTC. I'll finally be seeing an RE at the end of October.

I can't say that I have any advice for you either. Just know that there are many of us here to support you whenever you need us.

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  #5  
October 5th, 2009, 09:59 AM
Kary♥RN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Yes Kim... We are the "old" Timers of the board. I think you are about 7 months longer than me... My first loss will be a year next month.... Wow... A year Nov 11th since my first loss. I hate saying that. I hate it!
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