In Limbo, 6+ months, 2 week wait, 2 week wait to O.
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Yep...looked at my ticker today and realized I've crossed the timeline of 6 months of TTC with no luck. To make matters worse my cycle has gone wonky and I am spotting throughout the entire month so far. I am trying to maintain that stiff upper lip and keep my thoughts positive but it's getting harder and harder.....especially with my EDD rearing it'e head. I was due on Jan 31st....so I should be big and miserable right now. Instead...I am heartbroken and somewhat soul sick.
I don't talk to my RL friends w\about my fears and sadness (anymore) because they always say "As soon as you stop thinking about it, you'll get pregnant." Ugh. Why do they try to make this the fault of the person who is in so much pain? I think it just makes them feel better because they have no idea what to do or say. I wish they would just say, "I'm sorry" Or "I know this is hard, I am hear to listen."? But no, they expound on all their wisdom though most of them are not TTC or fertile as the **** navajo valley.
And now to add to my lovely mood I am dealing with some helacious insomnia. I am always exhuasted but as soon as I turn the light out I am wide awake and my mind runs in circles. I guess I am just whining and complaining but I am feeling pretty down and out right now.
I dropped a tear in the ocean, and whenever they find it I’ll stop loving you, only then. ~Unknown
I know how much it sucks to realize you are in this group! I am sorry you are here. And I don't know what to tell you about the cycle. Mine took 3 months to get back to "normal" but it stayed that way.
I also have pretty bad insomnia. Also, no words of advice. I just make sure I have something OTHER than TTC to think about when I lay in bed wide awake.
Thanks Chelsea (GraysMama) for my fantastic signature!
I've been having trouble falling asleep too. I wish I knew what was causing it. Once this cycle is over, I'm having a big glass of wine - that should help!
I'm sorry that your EDD is coming up and that your friends aren't being more supportive. Unfortunately unless they have experienced a loss or infertility they won't understand. But we do! You can vent/rant to us anytime.