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  • 1 Post By AmyLM
  • 1 Post By Just_Marie
  • 1 Post By ShawnaCAN
  • 2 Post By jhmomofmany
  • 1 Post By AmyLM
  • 4 Post By ShawnaCAN

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  #1  
November 9th, 2012, 10:30 AM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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We haven't told anybody except some friends of ours about the baby. I'm thinking I should tell my employer pretty soon and I want to tell family before it gets ridiculously late to do so.

When we were expecting Lucy we made the big announcement through DH's blog (it was a really cute post) but a few of the members of my family were not happy to find out online and felt we should have called personally before making the news public.

Honestly, I dread telling our family. Now that my dad has passed, I don't think there is anybody who will take this as good news. I do NOT want to make that phone call, I'd rather just share the ultrasound on FB or something and let them deal with it their own way. So, what's your opinion? Should I make the call anyway, or take the position that it is OUR news to share how we choose to share it?
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 3 and John Anthony, born May 24

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


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  #2  
November 9th, 2012, 10:49 AM
Julka
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Personally, I think it's completely up to you & your husband to decide how to share these news. If a person cannot be happy for you, they are not even worth worrying about. That's my opinion. Also, sorry for the blunt question... But why does your dad's passing makes adding another baby "bad news"?

With my last pregnancy, essentially only our moms knew till 12 weeks.. Maybe 1-2 other family members. After the 12 week ultrasound, we shared via FB.
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  #3  
November 9th, 2012, 03:55 PM
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I think you should announce it the way you want! In the past, I've sent out one mass email that said, "before I announce it on FB, I wanted to share our great news..." Mostly, that's for people I don't talk to on a regular basis.

Congratulations, BTW, if I hadn't already said it!
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  #4  
November 10th, 2012, 08:25 AM
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Julia, my dad was the only person in our family who was genuinely happy and supportive of us having a large family. The rest of my immediate family thinks we are irresponsible, that I'm putting my life/health in danger, that we already have too many, that lots of "good Catholics" use birth control, etc. etc.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 3 and John Anthony, born May 24

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


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  #5  
November 10th, 2012, 05:42 PM
Julka
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jhmomofmany View Post
Julia, my dad was the only person in our family who was genuinely happy and supportive of us having a large family. The rest of my immediate family thinks we are irresponsible, that I'm putting my life/health in danger, that we already have too many, that lots of "good Catholics" use birth control, etc. etc.
Ughhh... I see. I'm sorry they aren't being supportive, but totally know that feeling of being looked down on.
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  #6  
November 10th, 2012, 08:39 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I say call the people who are going to be happy and the rest can figure it out by blog, why walk into a fight you can see coming? Its your pregnancy to be happy about, do what is best for you and dh
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  #7  
November 11th, 2012, 04:52 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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Thanks for your thoughts, ladies. I want to do the charitable thing, but I also just really want to take the easy way out.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 3 and John Anthony, born May 24

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


Remember your resolution to lose weight or start working out? Click the blinkie to join us!



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  #8  
November 11th, 2012, 05:03 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Nobody is entitled to know except your employer. Let everyone else figure it out on their own!
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  #9  
November 11th, 2012, 05:59 PM
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Shawna, we've actually joked about not telling at all and just seeing if anybody noticed. We live in upper Michigan and they are in Oklahoma or Arkansas, with no plans for visits, so it would be VERY easy to just hide the pregnancy from them completely. While it's kind of funny to think of pulling that off I really wouldn't feel right about that at all.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 3 and John Anthony, born May 24

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


Remember your resolution to lose weight or start working out? Click the blinkie to join us!



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  #10  
November 12th, 2012, 09:13 AM
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After 4 kids or so, my mother in law just stopped telling her family at all. Her mother always gave her a hard time about it even though she had 8 children of her own!
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  #11  
November 12th, 2012, 09:59 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jhmomofmany View Post
Shawna, we've actually joked about not telling at all and just seeing if anybody noticed. We live in upper Michigan and they are in Oklahoma or Arkansas, with no plans for visits, so it would be VERY easy to just hide the pregnancy from them completely. While it's kind of funny to think of pulling that off I really wouldn't feel right about that at all.

We've done it; just not told anyone unless they ask. I find that telling people opens the door for them to say something rude, but if they have to approach *you* first - you get the advantage of steering the conversation. Like this:

Scenerio A:
You: "Guess what? We're expecting!"
Person: "HOLY CRAP, again????!?"


Scenerio B:
Person: "I just have to ask, but um, are you expecting again?"
You: "Yes, isn't it wonderful?"

In scenerio B, they may have been suspecting for awhile...so their initial shock or surprise will have worn off already; so you don't have to be subjected to it!
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  #12  
November 21st, 2012, 09:39 PM
SavaAngel's Avatar Mama to AJ & Katie
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Congrats! Tell people how you want but I agree with Shawna.
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  #13  
November 23rd, 2012, 01:05 AM
LJD3Tdance's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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The not telling thing has hurt us, if some day I change my mind and have a 6th, I think I'll tell them the day I find out to avoid the ridiculous drama. Of course if I loose the baby I'll probably end up giving them Hell for making me feel I had to do it before I was ready, that's on them...
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