Log In Sign Up

Hello there!


Forum: LDS Parenting

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To LDS Parenting LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
June 27th, 2011, 07:56 PM
meggie2685
Guest
Posts: n/a
My name is Meghan. My husband is Rafael and we are currently trying to conceive our first child. We have been married for almost 4 years. Has anyone else had trouble conceiving? I feel like being LDS adds another twist to have infertility issues. Does anyone have any suggestions of other sites dealing with LDS infertility? Thanks so much!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
June 27th, 2011, 08:33 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 5,281
Hey! I am Erica! My husband and I tried for 6 years and had 10 miscarriages before finally getting our little miracle Peter! Don't lose hope!
__________________
Thanks to Vicki... for my siggy!


Reply With Quote
  #3  
June 28th, 2011, 05:06 AM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In yonder mountains
Posts: 9,275
Hi! I am Rachel. 5 miscarriages later I am finally pregnant with a thriving child. You don't need to be a parent to be a member of this board. This board combined with the other boards seem to make a well rounded support system.
__________________


Thank you PrincessMom08 for my beautiful siggy!

Reply With Quote
  #4  
June 28th, 2011, 01:05 PM
Bug-n-Ed's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,520
Welcome to the board. I'm sorry you are struggling with infertility. My husband and I have secondary infertility and after trying for years after my younger son was born, we were led to adoption. We now have two beautiful twin baby girls because of this. We have also experienced the pain of miscarriage.

There are more around you than you know who are having to go through the trial of infertility. I belong to a yahoo group that's for LDS women who are going through infertility/miscarriages. It helped me a lot after my miscarriage between my two boys. It's not as active as it once was, though. If you'd like the info I can get it for you.

There are some articles on infertility that have been in the Ensign over the years. The most recent ones were from this past April. If you go to the church's website and search infertility it should bring them up. They are wonderful articles.

You are more than welcome to vent your frustrations with infertility here, especially as it relates to being LDS. Many ((((HUGS)))) for you!
__________________
Tami
Mommy to Brandon (8) and Edward (6)
Emma and Ellie (7 Months)

Reply With Quote
  #5  
June 28th, 2011, 04:11 PM
Butter's Avatar Heather the Mama Duk
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: San Antonio TX
Posts: 28,852
My sister took a while to conceive her son. He's almost 8 and they have not been successful conceiving another even with medical assistance (there is NOTHING medically that shows why they are not conceiving). She has said it is very hard being LDS and only having one child and not being able to have more. I know she goes to some sites for infertile people, but I don't know if any are LDS specific.
__________________


~Heather, wife to Jamie (15 years; June 5, 1998) and mom to
Ani - 14 (February 15, 2000), Cameron - 12 (October 3, 2001),
Fritz - 7 (July 11, 2006), and Adrian - 5 (June 19, 2008)
Smaller on the Outside

Reply With Quote
  #6  
June 28th, 2011, 04:49 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,523
Hello! I'm Brittanie.

I don't have any experience or advice, but I agree with the others, it's more common than you would think. I've watched my older brother and his wife struggle with this. She has a daughter from a previous relationship, but they have been unable to conceive a child together. It's so heartbreaking, especially when you constantly get asked "so when are you going to have a baby??"

Tami is right, feel free to vent here too.
__________________
Thanks to Vicki... for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog


Reply With Quote
  #7  
June 28th, 2011, 05:23 PM
meggie2685
Guest
Posts: n/a
Thank you all for the support! I think it probably is more common then I think, but not sure how to branch out and meet people with it. Its just hard cause I was always the little girl saying, "When I grow up I want to be a mommy!!" So its been a challenge. I am hoping we will get pregnant soon and that we will be able to have a large family. I work in a preschool and I LOVE kids! We are very open to adoption (my husband was adopted from Brazil when he was 12) and I have always wanted to adopt, but we are not really in a position to adopt right now.
Bug-n-Ed, did you go through LDS adoption services or another adoption agency?
Thanks again for the support everybody!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
June 28th, 2011, 06:27 PM
Bug-n-Ed's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,520
We did go through LDS Family Services, but kinda didn't as well. We did what they call a designated adoption as we found the birth mother ourselves. We had made adoption pass along cards with our family's picture on it and the contact info and our adoption profile on it. We sent them to family and friends. One of my friends passed along the card to a woman she had learned was thinking of placing her twins for adoption. She pretty much chose us to place with as soon as she saw our picture on the card. She agreed to go through LDSFS so that it'd be easier on us.

It was a wonderful experience and we still have contact with their birth mother. We really love and respect her and want to have her be a part of the girls' lives as long as she's comfortable doing so. She's trying to get her life back in order now.

Going through LDSFS is cheaper because the church subsidizes the cost, but the wait can be much longer for a couple reasons. One, there are many more adoptive couples waiting through LDSFS than other agencies and two, not as many potential birth mothers go to LDSFS as they do other agencies. The majority of those that do go to LDSFS decide on parenting instead of placing.

The wait through other agencies is usually not as long, especially if you are open to any race, but the cost is much higher.

You could also choose to do foster to adopt through your state. The cost is either free or very low cost, but it can be a heart wrenching experience when you have to give a child back that it's biological parents have finally got their act together. The state usually tries to only place foster kids in foster to adopt homes that are most likely going to have the parental rights terminated soon, but sometimes that doesn't happen.

Good luck in your journey to grow your family no matter where that journey takes you. Make sure you pray and follow the guidance you receive even if it seems off the wall or impossible at the time. Heavenly Father has a much greater plan for all us than we could ever imagine. The plan I had for our family to grow was much different than the path we were led to go on, but I wouldn't change it for anything. I learned and grew much during those years of struggling with infertility and waiting for a birth mother to choose us to place with. I wouldn't have been able to gain those things w/o the trial. Hang in there, sweetie.
__________________
Tami
Mommy to Brandon (8) and Edward (6)
Emma and Ellie (7 Months)

Reply With Quote
  #9  
June 28th, 2011, 06:34 PM
meggie2685
Guest
Posts: n/a
Thank you so much!! I have heard mixed things about the LDSFS. My friend had two couples in her neighborhood try to go through them, and then gave up because they had been waiting for so long. Then on the other hand, my friend was on their for three months and ended up being chosen by 3 different girls, and ended up adopting two of the babies within a month or so of each other. My husband and I are very open to all races, and my husband speaks Spanish and Portuguese, so I feel that would be a help. We have talked about doing foster to adopt, right now that is our best bet, other than getting pregnant ourselves. I want to adopt, but I also have always longed to give birth to a child also. But I love children and have no doubt that I will love my kids no matter how they come to me. Thank you for sharing your story with me, that gives me hope. My friend just went from having no kids August 2009 to now having adopted 2 biological siblings at birth, with another one on the way....crazy how sometimes life can change in such drastic ways in a short amount of time!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by geogeek View Post
Hi! I am Rachel. 5 miscarriages later I am finally pregnant with a thriving child. You don't need to be a parent to be a member of this board. This board combined with the other boards seem to make a well rounded support system.

Congrats! I can only imagine how hard a miscarriage would be, let alone 5. My friend had 3 within a year of each other, and it was so hard to watch her have to go through that. How long have you been trying to conceive?

Quote:
Originally Posted by stargatemommy View Post
Hey! I am Erica! My husband and I tried for 6 years and had 10 miscarriages before finally getting our little miracle Peter! Don't lose hope!

Wow, 10 miscarriages! I am trying to not lose hope, and stories like yours definitely help. I bet you appreciate Peter so much because of the long road to him. I hope something happens for us soon. Thanks for sharing your story!
Reply With Quote
  #10  
June 28th, 2011, 10:49 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 2,239
We have also been through lots of infertility. It took us five years to conceive our first, and then another three years with an early miscarriage before our second son was conceived. Infertility is the pits, and you're right. Being a Mormon and struggling with infertility is a double whammy. I would be glad to share anything that might be helpful to you, if you have any questions.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
June 29th, 2011, 01:20 PM
geogeek's Avatar Marsi's Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In yonder mountains
Posts: 9,275
I didn't struggle with infertility per se. Here is my blog post on what happened with us in our journey. I guess I am a "simple" case.
__________________


Thank you PrincessMom08 for my beautiful siggy!

Reply With Quote
  #12  
July 1st, 2011, 03:57 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: My heart belongs in Washington DC
Posts: 6,415
Hi! I'm RJ, one of the hosts, I haven't been around because my computer decided to die on me, so I'll be in and out, but I'm glad to see another new girl around here. I can't wait to get to know you!
__________________


Thank you to the wonderful ladies who mad the blinkies!

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude..... These experiences, while often difficult to bear at the time, are percisely the kinds of experiences that stretch our understanding, build our character and increase our compassion for others."
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:46 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0