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9th time around...not the best experience ever (very long!)


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  #1  
November 17th, 2010, 09:19 AM
♥womanintheshoe♥'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,036
I should have known labor was about to start. My sense of urgency at getting projects done went from giving myself a week to needing something done NOW. Monday the 19th I had to rearrange and clean my bedroom so that is what dh and I were doing at 10pm! It could not possibly wait until the next day. I pushed away the thought of having my baby 3 weeks early and determined to use Tuesday to accomplish the tasks I had left on my enormous list.

Tuesday, however, found me taking care of my dd who had the stomach flu. I myself felt horribly nauseous which I attributed to my own flu coming on, ignoring the fact that the nausea had been building for over a week and that has always signaled the onset of labor. When I could take it no longer I ended up in bed at about 4:30pm. The contractions I began feeling I thought were due to the fact that I had not been able to eat or drink much that day so I repositioned myself, had about 10 contractions, then went to sleep. Each time I turned over the same thing happened so I didn't think much of it, until I realized that the contractions were not stopping the last time I turned over. Watching the clock I timed them at about 1.5-2 minutes apart - not intense yet definitely not Braxton Hicks, either. I slept on and off for a few hours until 9:30 when I decided to get up and move around to see what would happen. Well, what happened was that the intensity set in. I got dressed, makeup on (more to calm myself than anything), woke up my two oldest dds and told dh to keep sleeping since I would probably be home within an hour.

The hospital was only 3 minutes away yet by the time I arrived I was doing more labor breathing and had to stop as we walked toward the entrance. When the nurse checked me and told me I was 3cm I freaked out, ordered my girls to call daddy and the labor team, and demanded an epidural. I'm sure the staff still remembers the psychotic woman I was because to every question I included, "GET THE ANESTHESIOLOGIST NOW!!!" I was at 4cm within 20 minutes of arriving and I just knew I wasn't going to get drugs, however the anesthesiologist happened to be on site and my OB was on duty that night so she convinced him to give me the epidural despite my only being at 4cm.

Once the epi was in place (11pm) and my labor team there I relaxed and actually smiled, until the nurse came back in and refused to get my OB to break my water. I told her that if my water was broken I would dilate and deliver within 20 minutes; she said to wait a bit longer and see how labor progressed. What happened was the worst experience I've ever had...

My labor stalled, my epi hurt, my IV burned from the penicillin they gave me as my GBS test results were not yet in, I was shaking and actually crying (something I've never done, not even during natural childbirth). Every time I asked the nurse to have my water broken she said to wait. Finally at 6:30 my OB came in and checked me...still at 4cm. She broke my water then left the room, and there I went just like I knew I would!!! I started to yell for her to come in and the idiotic nurse told me she would be there in a minute to which I responded that she didn't have a minute! Then I was told my OB was coming down the hallway and I yelled, "SHE'D BETTER BE RUNNING DOWN THAT HALLWAY!!!" At that point baby's head came out and Nurse Idiot had to hold that while my OB came racing in. Then Nurse Idiot told me to not push, that she wanted me to "labor down". Things got ugly at that point.

I know what laboring down is and I want not part of it. I push to the count of 10, take a breath, push again...it works for me every time. I snapped at NI, "I've pushed out 8 babies, don't tell me not to push!" and she snapped back that she'd helped deliver over a hundred babies so labor down! I glared at her (we have my death look on tape) and PUSHED ONCE...baby was out, born on 7/21 at 7:22 (less than 30 minutes after having my water broken!). I could have wrung her neck! Nurse Idiot wasn't done, however...

She told me to not pass baby around until he had nursed. It was in my birth plan to nurse right away yet I knew he was not able to latch on at all (being 3 weeks early he struggled with that for 24 hours) so passed him to one of my labor team so they could hold him then head off to bed/work. Nurse Idiot took my baby back, gave him to me, and told me to nurse! She would not shut up! One of my labor team wanted to bodily throw her out of the room, he was that angry at her. Once NI left the room for a moment I passed baby to someone and told them to not let NI take him again.

The rest of the time went fairly well overall. NI proved to be a decent nurse as far as postpartum care; she didn't let anyone disturb me for a few hours so I could sleep and even hospital staff had to get her permission to go in my room. My next nurse seemed nice enough until it came time for feeding. Baby would not latch on at all and I was OK with that knowing babies are made to go up to 24 hours without nursing with no problems (typically). Yet she insisted that I get even a few drops of colostrum in his mouth which I did by expressing, yet she wanted me to pump. OK, now, think about this...so little colostrum going into a pump gets lost in the membrane and is quite useless to attempt. I told her it wasn't working and I would come up with something else. This is where it gets funny (sort of)...

I went out to the nurse's desk to ask for medicine cups as I figured I would pump just enough to get in the shield, then drip that into the medicine cup, suction it with a syringe and feed baby that way. As I stood there my nurse, on the phone with my pediatrician, her back to me, said, "There's a mom of 9 here who won't listen to anyone and is going to do things her own way." I stood there with a small smile on my face which turned into a larger smile when my nurse turned around and saw me standing there, listening. Needless to say I got my medicine cup and proceeded to pump 3.5 syringes full of colostrum! And my pediatrician's response? "This woman has had 8 children...LEAVE HER ALONE!" I love my pediatrician.

I stayed one night, something I had not done since #5. My dh came back and stayed as well, something he had not done since #2. He went to sleep and my baby, who was awake a good part of the day, decided to stay up all night which was fine with me. I walked the halls with him, sat in the waiting room watching some reality show while holding baby and doing deep knee bends. I will never forget that first night with my new baby...by myself, dh sleeping, knowing I had help if I needed it yet loving being by myself and getting to know my newest little one. I hated seeing the hands on the clock move so fast as I wanted time to stop, for that precious night to go on and on.

At 4am I used a pacifier to teach baby to suck and when he got that I quick popped him on to nurse. His eyes went wide then he latched on just like that! Stupid nurses!!! Had they just shut up and let me do what I knew had to be done we wouldn't have had such contention!

Dh went home at about 5am to sleep (more) before getting the kids ready to come to the hospital to escort baby home. They had come the night before after dinner to meet their new brother which was a blast! There were so many kids my dh was actually challenged by the door nurse as to whether they were all truly siblings or not, lol. I was able to spend a few hours with just baby before they arrived which was another precious time. I sat in the room looking around, memorizing every detail, marveling at how just 48 hours prior I had no idea my baby was getting ready to make his world debut. The thing that amazes me most in a hospital room is the bed - a seemingly innocuous object yet the site of miracles happening. I prayed as I sat there that this would not be the last time I was in a labor/delivery room as a new mama.

Kids and dh arrived at lunchtime so while I changed they ate and played with the TV remote. Then it was time to go so out we walked into the hallway (thank goodness I was given the option of using a wheelchair this time so I actually was able to leave like a normal human being rather than a patient!). I have to confess that as we left, my dh carrying the carseat and my "ducks" surrounding me, I felt I had won the lottery, that I was the most lucky/blessed woman on earth. Such happiness cannot possibly be expressed in words, so I cried instead.

Once at home I unpacked my hospital bag, packed a diaper bag, took a short nap then got ready to go to a marriage class dh and I had been attending. It was such fun walking in with my brand new baby although a bit embarrassing when I had to stand and introduce him (he had no name yet!) in front of a couple hundred people. After the class dh and I went out to eat then friends who had been at the labor came to take me and my 11yod to their house for the night. We did this so that I would be away from my "workplace" as I had already begun working that very afternoon (laundry, picking up stuff, schoolwork, etc.). I was a bit nervous to not have dh with me in case I needed him yet baby slept great and my dd was a wonderful help, holding baby while I slept. I determined to be a good new mama and actually rest as much as I could, something I had never done with the other babies, and it paid off as I felt wonderful! Dh came up with the rest of the kids later the next day and we stayed for dinner then headed home.

Little one did not have a name until he was 6 days old and then he was named only because the hospital lady called and said if I didn't get in there by 3pm (this was Tuesday) she would submit his birth certificate as "No Name Bond". I sent out a fast poll on FB then decided on Alec Geoffrey: Alec is a name I have loved since reading Louisa May Alcott's book Eight Cousins as a child, Geoffrey is my brother's name. I really like that I got to use two initials I had not used at all before, too. The middle name was the hardest to decide on yet once I saw it on the official hospital form I knew it was his perfect name.

I had a blast with Alec and being a new (again) mama. I was hardly home at all, preferring to be out in public. When he was just 9 days old I packed up the other kids and headed to NM for a week for a "babymoon". We had a blast going to museums, the zoo and the aquarium. I loved introducing Alec to people, loved being with my sweet children away from the distractions and busyness of home life.

Alec is my easiest baby yet for which I am very thankful. He is a beautiful child and that is huge for me to say as I find few babies to be cute in any way especially as newborns. I can't wait to do this all over again and pray with every part of my being that my childbearing days are not done. Nothing compares to this miracle...nothing.

The only part of this (besides Nurse Idiot) that I struggle with is the fact that I had Alec 3 weeks early. So many women want to have their babies early even to the point they try to self-induce at just 37 weeks. I felt that I was yanked out of the world of pregnancy too soon and against my will, lol. I fought sadness for weeks after his birth as I was not ready to be done with all that pregnancy is for me. I struggled with anger at the fact that I had even stopped exercising just to prevent early labor, that I wasn't one of the ones wishing my baby was here early even if it meant baby being in the NICU! There was a reason for it, I know, and what matters is he was born healthy and safely.

I have a ton of pictures yet here are some of my favorite:

This is when we heard Brahm's Lullaby being played over the loudspeakers and the nurse informed me that this one was for Alec.

Meeting the newest addition (woman is one of my labor team):
Another of my labor team members:
And her husband (also present at my delivery):
About 6 minutes new:
Three most important members of my labor team (dh, 13yod, 11yod):

My future nurse/midwife taking care of little brother:
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One-time "I'm NEVER having kids!" woman to mama of 11. Love living the beautiful life I thought I never wanted. ♥

Also missing 11 precious little ones here with us but for a moment.

VERY cautiously expecting after two losses early 2013. Hoping and praying my Valentine's Day due date baby sticks this time.
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  #2  
November 17th, 2010, 11:14 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Maryland
Posts: 20,233
He's so precious. I'm sorry you had to deal with such an idiotic nurse and that he was 3 weeks early. Sarah was also 3 weeks early and it still upsets me. She didn't have all that baby fat, she was just skin and bones. Plus she has reflux and I've always wondered if those last 3 weeks would've prevented that. Just every little thing makes me wonder if 3 more weeks would've made the difference. It sounds like you're doing better with it though which is absolutely great.
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  #3  
November 17th, 2010, 07:55 PM
mshah's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have 3 words: You Are Beautiful!!!

Your signature at the bottom is the most wonderful thing I've ever heard. I love the photo, too! You're an amazing woman!
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Last edited by mshah; November 18th, 2010 at 04:26 AM.
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  #4  
November 19th, 2010, 06:12 PM
KatieHeitman's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Aww...congrats! My DS1 was 3 1/2 weeks early (a complete surprise, my water broke in bed), so I know how you feel about being yanked out of the pregnancy world to early. As long as they're healthy that's what matters.
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  #5  
November 19th, 2010, 08:50 PM
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So happy to hear from you and to hear your story. What a beautiful family you have
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  #6  
November 22nd, 2010, 03:08 PM
Trish36's Avatar Mom of 4
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You have such a beautiful family. Sorry your nurse was such an idiot. Awesome birth story!!!!
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  #7  
December 1st, 2010, 11:40 AM
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Great story!! I should have tried that paci trick
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