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The time has come for me to make some changes. Starting tomorrow, January 5th 2009, I will start the project of taking my body back. Thorughout the past couple of years I've struggled with low self esteem, being a single parent, eating for comfort. I am only 21 and weigh in at 210. Yes, i am 5'6 and i may wear it well but my bmi is 34....obese! I come from a family where high blood pressure, diabeties, etc are very common. I must get in shape. The lowest I've ever weighed was 140. Pre-pregnancy i was 165. I was at a happy place then. However that is not my weight loss goal. I want to get down to 145-160. I want to lose this baby fat once in for all. I want to feel confidence and not be shy or embarrased about my stomach "rolls" and jiggly arm fat. I want to wear clothes that women my age are wearing, Halters and short dresses. I"m Taking back my body!!!!
this week i will be starting off with Dr. Ian's fat smash diet. The first stage is going to be detox. Fruits, veggies, brown rice, and yogurt ( 2 servings) are allowed as well as 2 egg whites.
My goal for this week are:
breakfast- 2 egg whites, water
snack: frozen grapes
lunch: cucumbers w/ pepper and vineagar, a veggie and water
snack: apple/ 1 serving vanilla yogurt (low fat)
dinner: sweet potatoe, water
I will defiantely be switching up the menu each day!
Wake at 6 am and do some cardio for 30 minutes. Walk 30 mintues suring my lunch break. Come home and do some more exercise, I recently purchased a belly dancing dvd so i may try that out.
All in all i think this is going to be a week of hell but i can get thorugh these 9 days and after that i ge tot enjoy the foods i like. Except fats and fried foods of course!
This first week has been alright. After forgoing the "fat smash diet" because i just must have meat lol, i started jsut eating healthy. I msut admit i didn't get in too much exercise, i think i exercised for 1 hour total this whole week. That's going to change next week. Next week i'm hitting up the gym, walking more, and not sitting around doing nothing. I amnaged to lose 6 lbs this 1st week, which isn't bad but i know i could do better. I'm down from 210 to 204. I'll be happy when i can look at the scale and make it to the 100s! I'm shooting for 5 lbs next week. My biggest obstacle is work. With people who buy lunch constantly and then say here you can have some. And when you tell them your on a diet theysay oh this isn't going to hurt anything. That's what happened to me *sigh* I gave in to 3, yes 3 , slices of pizza form pizza hut( it was oh so good!!!),a valentines day debbie snack, and a large dr.pepper. I knew it was wrong becaus ewhile i was eating it in the back of my mind all i could think about was " this is going to mess up my diet! " lol. I'm going to have to find some things that can be substituted when situations like that occur. On a good note, i'm actually liking this water thing. I drink 64 ozs + on most days or at least the 64 oz.
I really hope i lose these 5 lbs. It would be so motivating to reach 199. I know 199 is still overweight but it would be great to see the 1 instead of the 2. I really want some frecn fries. I need to look into oven baked sweet potato fries and see how that tastes. I overdid it today, i ate way to much. Two bowls of chilli. Beans,Beans, good for your heart, the more you eat em the more you....weigh lol. I'm getting better at watching what i put into my body which is what this is all about. I want to feel better about myslef. Even though I only lost 6 lbs this 1st week, i just consider it 6 lbs lighter. I figure if i can lose at least a lb or 2 a week i'm in the green. Smooth sailing from here!
Well so mcuh for losing the 5 lbs. I lost 1 which is still good. I have been eating very healthy but allowing myself a taste of something once a week. I ahve a lot to prove. Everyone thinks I will fail this diet like many others I have failed. I refuse. In other news, deadbeat DF has tried to come back into our lives once again. It's not going to work this time. He hasn't done anything for ds since the 1st 3 months of his life. I've already taken him back twice. Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. I may not find anybody who wants me and DS but I'm better off alone than with him. But that's totally o/t well not really because when i lose this weight he'll be kicking himself in the ### for letting me and DS go in the 1st place! lol. I'm liking the results I see and am going to invest in a tape measurer so i can keep track of inches and such.I didn't overeat today, even though I went to an inauguration party where there was tons of food, i made the right choices! I am not only learning to eat better but also live better also.
Down 9 lbs with 1 week left in this month... pretty good but not good enough. i find myself about to go abck into my old habits. I had to talk myself out of ordering that jr. bacon cheeseburger from WEndy's last night. I had to get rid of the Tahitian treat soda once i realized it had 200 calories. It's all so depressing. This is what always happens. I get into a healthy way of life but things happen and I want to eat...junk. AF's gone, can't blame her. It's me and my attitude. I need to really kick it up. I did no exercise today adnr eally don't think I'll be doing any, I'm too tired from work. Maybe next week I'll be feeling a little more upbeat. New month, New plans!
Haven't did this in a while. Last week I made my 1st milestone of 199.4! Yay me right? No, not at all. Right after I hit the 199 I wanted so badly, I had a binge week, well sort of. I ate a lot of those 100 calorie packs and had doritos and other things that were not good for you. I succumed to fast food once again, I jsut can't stay away. I went to Captain D's for dinner twice this week and I had a kid's meal one night. Good thing is I stayed within my calorie intake for the most part. I know the scale will probably be over or @ 200 tomorrow when i weigh in. I'm prepared for it. I will do better nextweek. I know we all have our setbacks or w/e. This is mine. No more setbacks after this. Biggest Loser challenge next week and I AM READY! I can't wait to meet my teammates!
The truth is... I've been suffering from depression lately. When I'm depressed, what's the 1st thing I run to...food. Food is my comfort, my love life, my joy, my friend. At the same time food is my destructor, my enemy, the cause to make me go futher into depression. I need to find pther ways to deal. I've found that reading helps. The source of my depression. finding out deadbeat has just gotten married and has a new baby girl who he is apparently taking care of. I was doing well until I found out this bit of info, curse you Facebook. I'm getting back on track tomorrow. I've thrown out all my comfort foods once again and have gotten all my exercise videos and equipment back ready. Why should I suffer and become a beach whale because of him being happy? I need to become happy and find someone, walloing in my sorrows is not goinng to help anything, it's going to make it worse. So goodbye fat, goodbye laziness, and goodbye food. I don't need you anymore (lol well technically i do but let me rephrase) I don't need you to comfort anymore, i eat to live and eat to live only. Not the other way around. I'm in charge of what goes in ym mouth.It's time for me to take charge!!!
I'm feeling a heck of a lot better this week. Been eating a lot more healthier. I did have fast food once, on Friday. I also went out to eat with the family last night but made alot of healthy decisions. ( i did have a serving of mac-n- cheese though!) I feel like I'm finally getting back on track. I will be down to the 190s in no time!