[jen44]

After taking about 15 Wondfo with mixed results, I took a digital. I guess I can't argue with the results!



Now comes the sad part. My very good friend is going through a miscarriage right now after trying (with medical intervention) for over a year I want to be happy but knowing that she's so devistated makes it difficult. What do I say? When do I tell her?

[Miss Bunny]

Congrats to you but I am so sorry for your friend! I know how hard that can be. A friend of mine has been trying for a while and I got prego on the first shot

[chica4chocolate]

We were just talking about this in MOPS group. Other women who had been through losses were sharing about how to approach a woman after a loss, etc. They said to be honest, and to empathize with what they are going through. You might want to give her some time to grieve before you tell her- but don't wait until you are showing because then she might feel like you are springing it on her. Does that make sense?

Congrats on your BFP! I hope you can find a way to talk to your friend when the time is right.

[11eleven]

Originally Posted by jen44

After taking about 15 Wondfo with mixed results, I took a digital. I guess I can't argue with the results!



Now comes the sad part. My very good friend is going through a miscarriage right now after trying (with medical intervention) for over a year I want to be happy but knowing that she's so devistated makes it difficult. What do I say? When do I tell her?

I acutally posted a similar thread here. I still haven't told my friend, I just don't want to hurt her, I know everything she's been through.

so I feel your pain!

[BrittneyLA]

I think your in my July playroom. Congrats!! I dont really know how to deal with that. My Dhs uncle and aunt lost there 15 month old 2 years ago to an ear infection that entered her blood stream. They have been trying for over a year after a vasectomy reversal and no luck. He is also my DHs boss, we have NO clue how to tell them...I feel almost guilty that I am pregnant and they are trying so hard!!

[MeganMomof5]

Welcome and Congrats! I'm sorry about your friend...I agree it's best to be honest, but at the same time her pain might be too raw right now...I've been through 3 losses recently, and I think it would of been too hard if a friend told me they were pregnant so soon after my loss...I think you should do what you think is best.

[purplelady]

hugs hun, that is a hard spot to be in . i agree with being honest with her. she is most likely going to feel the same emotions no matter when you tell her. and better that she doesnt feel like you were keeping it from her, that might hurt her even more. i had a friend of mine tell me about her pg two days after i lost my twins, and yeah it hurt a lot, but i would have been even more hurt had she kept it from me. (((hugs)))

[jen44]

Originally Posted by BrittneyLA

I think your in my July playroom. Congrats!! I dont really know how to deal with that. My Dhs uncle and aunt lost there 15 month old 2 years ago to an ear infection that entered her blood stream. They have been trying for over a year after a vasectomy reversal and no luck. He is also my DHs boss, we have NO clue how to tell them...I feel almost guilty that I am pregnant and they are trying so hard!!

Hi!!! Yep, I'm in the July playroom! I know what you mean about feeling guilty. I almost wish that she was in my situation and I was in hers because I just feel so bad for her. And then I start feeling guilty for thinking that! A cycle of emotions I guess

[katchi]

Congrats to you and I'm so sorry for your friend. I don't have any advice to offer, unfortunately, but lots of hugs and support. I think Laura's suggestion was a good one, to give her some time to recover before you tell her.

[jen44]

Thank you all for the advice! I think I'll wait a couple of weeks and feel the situation out. I will tell her first before I tell anyone else so she has some time to process it before anyone else knows.

[Banned-KiennasMom]

Congratulations and welcome! I'm sorry to hear of your friends loss. I experienced my first loss yesterday, one of my triplets. It's like losing a peice of yourself, and a peice of your future. Your friend will be ok. She'll hurt for a while. I went through the same thing with my BFF, but I was in your friends situation and I didn't miscarry, just couldn't get pregnant at all. It took 6 years to conceive Kienna. It all depends on your friend. Do you think she'd be more upset i you told her now, or more upset that you didn't tell her now? It's always such a hard situation and I'm sure you'll make the right choice, there is no wrong choice!

[ashj_1218]

Welcome and congrats to you. I am very sorry for your friend's loss...we have been there many times. But you got some great advice and I trust you will go with what feels right and the most sensitive. Try to be happy...I would never want a friend of mine to not feel happy about a pregnancy simply because I lost mine. That won't help anything You sound like a great friend.