July 13th, 2011, 10:16 AM
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Veteran
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Oregon
Posts: 254
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I can understand both your positions.
I hate fake people, but sometimes they can only fake the joy that they know you want them to feel. Been there-after our first loss, we were told that we would never be able to have children. I could never understand how a loving committed couple couldn't yet a friend who made poor lifestyle choices could. I attended her shower and helped with her daughter, but didn't actually felt happy for her, I would cry all the way home. Time was the only thing that allowed me to heal enough to be happy for her.
Remember, your mom is her mom too and it sounds like you share some of the same friends. We need to be able to vent and these are the people we feel safe doing so with-we aren't always trying to be hateful to someone else but express the pain we feel.
My mother and I have a rule as I work for my brother and at times can't stand him. I need to be able to tell her how I feel, but she does not share that with anyone else, especially him. She talks me through my feelings. Maybe she could do this for you and your sister.
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