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Rant I cant post on my fb . Sorry, but I need to get this out...a baby cannot be asked to sit silently in favor of your computer games, & cannot be expected to understand why you are mad that you are being interupted from your less then useful hobby. Step up, get off farmville and help parent. Your daughter is screaming because her jaw hurts, but " the great parent" cant be bothered to pick her up and try to soothe her, just snapping at her because shes loud. And you still cant understand why im so close to leaving you???
I have repeatly told my BF not to get pissed at Willow for being loud, but he tells me shes just spoiled from me breast feeding, & thats why she doesnt like him. Um, she coos at you and you keep playing on that **** computer, I wanna pitch it out the window. He thinks she should love him but only spends a hour tops with her a day when hes off work the whole day. Its not my breastfeeding preventing bonding, its your laziness in not feeding, bathing, reading, playing...anything....
I wish I could afford to leave, this is not healthy for either of us.
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More fundamental than religion is our basic human spirituality. We have a basic human disposition towards love, kindness and affection, irrespective of whether we have a religious framework or not. When we nurture this most basic human resource – when we set about cultivating those basic inner values which we all appreciate in others, then we start to live spiritually. - Dalai Lama
hun I would find a way to leave. Your right its not healthy and I swear 99% of the time when you mention him he is doing something stupid as h3ll, borderline abusive, or just being plain useless... IDK how you have dealt with his BS this long
Because I didnt believe I deserved any better, on lease with him, and hes a good sweet talker... but I got to think about Willows best interest.
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More fundamental than religion is our basic human spirituality. We have a basic human disposition towards love, kindness and affection, irrespective of whether we have a religious framework or not. When we nurture this most basic human resource – when we set about cultivating those basic inner values which we all appreciate in others, then we start to live spiritually. - Dalai Lama
He does work, and he is bipolar, but refuses to anything about it. No meds, no consueling...hes "finewithout some stupid doctor".
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More fundamental than religion is our basic human spirituality. We have a basic human disposition towards love, kindness and affection, irrespective of whether we have a religious framework or not. When we nurture this most basic human resource – when we set about cultivating those basic inner values which we all appreciate in others, then we start to live spiritually. - Dalai Lama
My mom is in the same situation so I hear about it ev-er-y-daaaay. Unfortunately, she needs him to pay half of the bills. IT is horrible when you are in an abusive relationship but are stuck because you couldn't make it without them. Good luck.
once I get back to work I could likely get by, I can split rent with my brother but I need to get off tyis lease first.
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More fundamental than religion is our basic human spirituality. We have a basic human disposition towards love, kindness and affection, irrespective of whether we have a religious framework or not. When we nurture this most basic human resource – when we set about cultivating those basic inner values which we all appreciate in others, then we start to live spiritually. - Dalai Lama
sorry that you are going through this, maybe you should the 'get help with your depression or get out' chat. maybe he's not fully aware of exactly how he makes you feel, u need to sit him down and lay it on the table. Goodluck and i hope it works out well for your family
Alright I’m going to be straight with you because I’ve been there and done that. This is pretty emotional for me to type out so please don’t take anything I say to harshly. All I ask is you to take it seriously.
My first daughter is 15, her father got abusive during my pregnancy with her. Things escalated to a point when she was a year old that I had to get out. Basically he started getting abusive towards her. This is completely unacceptable behavior and not something I was willing to put up with.
I was broke, I only had a job working at Mcd’s part time, I got that job because I had to get out of the house. I was going crazy with dealing with her dad.
I had no money saved because my money went towards food.
I called a friend of mine who lived over an hour away and asked her if we could live with her by renting out her room. Thankfully it worked out that her roommate was moving out and she needed a new one. I planned my escape for 3 months till we finally did it.
My girlfriend welcomed us with open arms. I paid rent and we split the food bill down the middle. When I moved in with her I got another job at Mcd’s and then I worked part time at burger king as well. Eventually I moved to waitressing and brought a little more money home. From here I kept moving myself up, I would go to school, get a better job.
At one point I did go back to the man ( he talked a good talk too, very manipulative) and this is when we eventually (my daughter and I became homeless and winded up in a shelter) Never go back, it will just make your life worse!
Now during this time, when my daughter was a year old till she was 4 I fought for her in court. Her dad kept filing for full custody (he told the judge he didn’t want to pay child support) because my ex had free lawyers (union) he just kept filing paperwork over and over. I was in court at one point once a week for an entire year. (over an hour from where I lived at this point) now remember in the beginning where I told you he was abusive. I would refuse to let my daughter go and visit him, then the court threatened to throw me in jail unless I did. So at one point I had to let her go. All this time I was fighting him in court. My daughter came home one time, with marks.
That was it, I was done. She never ever went back from that day forward. The court threatened me over and over. I told them at one point, throw me in jail but I will not let my child be harmed again. It took almost 3 years before the court starting taking me seriously. Then CPS got involved and low and behold they found him to be an abusive parent to his other kids as well.
So he was given supervised visitation. Which we attended twice till my ex asked me to sign paperwork where he would give up his rights and he wouldn’t have to pay child support.
The court eventually took all of his rights away but he was still obligated to pay child support. My daughter has not seen her father since she was about 3 ˝. He did die in 2009 though. He died owing me almost 50,000 in child support. He was making around 60k a year but somehow kept getting away with not paying support because of his free lawyers.
The point in all of this is that you can do it. I was homeless, literally. We lived in my car till I found an women’s abusive shelter and we stayed there for 2 months. I got a job in that town and then an apartment. I have come very far in my life because of my ambition.
Even if the abuse is not physical, emotional is just as bad. My ex was physically and emotionally abusive. He wore me down so bad I thought I was trash. Guess what, I’m not trash. I’m a terrific mom and a great person. I found all of this out because I left him.
My advice is do right by your child and everything will work itself out.
Brooke, I am so so sorry that you went through all that.... And wow at making such an amazing comeback. That is great and I'm so happy you did. I also agree with Brooke, Megan, when she says you need to GET OUT. What happens when one day Willow is laughing or blowing spit bubbles or whining and he can't "take it anymore"..... I don't even want to think about it. You need to get out so you don't have to.
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