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Forum: May 2012 Playroom

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  #1  
February 17th, 2012, 10:10 AM
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A bunch of my friends have had baby boys in the past year and they are all freaking me out. They all had girls first and every time we're talking they have to mention how boys are just naturally more aggressive, more into things etc.

Examples:
1) There's nothing I can do, but the baby boy will get into the toilet and try to drink the water, or throw toys in it.

2) I will be peed on numerous times

3) I have to watch to see if his testicles descend since many aren't at birth

4) He's going to need a haircut by 6 weeks old and then every 2 weeks after that

And the list goes on. So, moms of boys (especially those that have girls as well), have you found that there is a big difference naturally between the genders? Or not so much? I think most of it is just a personality thing, not a gender thing. But maybe I'm wrong. Is there anything I should really know about having a boy?
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  #2  
February 17th, 2012, 10:12 AM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
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Whaaa? Are they sure they didn't give birth to a dog?

My son is gentle, kind, compassionate and WONDERFUL. I know that sounds like I'm blowing sunshine up your butt, but I'm serious.

I have a feeling your baby will be just as great. It's all how you raise a kid. Some kids are more rambunctious, but I bet a mother of all girls can tell you one of them is more wild than the others. It happens.

What's the thing about the hair? My son didn't have a haircut for over a year.
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  #3  
February 17th, 2012, 10:16 AM
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Originally Posted by *Jillian* View Post
Whaaa? Are they sure they didn't give birth to a dog?
Seriously, the way some of them talk it sounds like it. They all just keep telling me that boys are naturally wild no matter what, etc. I mean, my girls have their moments but they're pretty calm for the most part. I'm just nervous now.
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  #4  
February 17th, 2012, 10:16 AM
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I definitely think it's a difference in parenting style. Some people let their child get away with all sorts of stuff, others have more boundaries. Boys do get aggressive, especially when playing with other boys, but I am just now seeing this with some of the boys in Jack's class and with him. And again, we give him boundaries. I think a lot of the differences between the genders won't really come up until they are toddler age or older. That's my 2 cents! And getting peed on isn't that bad. I think it only happened his first 3 months of life occasionally.
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  #5  
February 17th, 2012, 10:16 AM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
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Oh. My son won't hit. Why? Because I've taught him not to hit. It's seriously all what you put up with. He isn't going to get away with being aggressive just because boys are stereotypically rougher.
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  #6  
February 17th, 2012, 10:18 AM
Jennmarie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Twhylite21 View Post
A bunch of my friends have had baby boys in the past year and they are all freaking me out. They all had girls first and every time we're talking they have to mention how boys are just naturally more aggressive, more into things etc.

Examples:
1) There's nothing I can do, but the baby boy will get into the toilet and try to drink the water, or throw toys in it.

2) I will be peed on numerous times

3) I have to watch to see if his testicles descend since many aren't at birth

4) He's going to need a haircut by 6 weeks old and then every 2 weeks after that

And the list goes on. So, moms of boys (especially those that have girls as well), have you found that there is a big difference naturally between the genders? Or not so much? I think most of it is just a personality thing, not a gender thing. But maybe I'm wrong. Is there anything I should really know about having a boy?
I don't have a girl of my own(yet!) to compare too, but here's my experience with 2 boys
1-My oldest was a dream baby/toddler, didn't do any of that crazy/aggravating stuff. My youngest ds is ALWAYS into something, including the toilet. He likes to stand there. He loves baths/water anyways; so its just another form of it to him. We just try to keep him out of the bathroom; and keep very clean toilets as much as possible.

2-DS1 peed on me all. the. freaking time; but I got better at changing diapers and better about dropping a washcloth/wipe on him and his brother as I cleaned him up to prevent it, and it wasn't nearly as bad second time around.

3-Idk. I would imagine your pediatrician would let you know if that's an issue-it wasn't anything I ever heard.

4- I didn't cut DS1's hair for the first time until his 3rd birthday (very rare diy trims of his bangs, but that was it; and DS2's until his second.) DS1 was bald for a year; and DS2 had peach fuzz for a year that stood straight up. It was so adorable So yeah; I have NO idea where that came from.

I have always heard that girls are more trouble than boys.. my boys are active; and like to horseplay; but I've just gotten used to it. I know what their horseplay vs. fighting sounds like and I tend to just let them go at it until it gets to fighting. They usually don't fight though; if one gets aggravated with his brother, he just leaves.
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  #7  
February 17th, 2012, 10:20 AM
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Exactly! My son never hits. Rarely throws a fit. He has started to like to wrestle a bit with the boys in his pre-k class, but it's in fun. I think some moms of boys assume it is somehow ok to allow their son's to hit or push, when it isn't, and so they never correct it. And perhaps their boys are more stubborn, but that could just be because it's their personality of they are a middle child or something - it's not just because they are a boy. And with stubborn kids you have to be consistent, but a lot of parents aren't. If their kid is crazy it isn't because he is a boy, it's because they allow him to be!
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  #8  
February 17th, 2012, 10:34 AM
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All of DS's friends at daycare are girls and my friends have girls. To me, Jake is different than most of the girls. And most of the moms say that Jake is different than their girls. I think that is just fine though! Jake also likes to dress up like a princess, play with purses, and play dolls. And that is just fine too!

-I do have to cut Jake's hair a lot now, which he hates, so we aren't big fans of having to do it.
-He has done some pretty gross things. I once walked into his room during an airing out time (no diaper) and found that he had pooped in the oven of his play kitchen. He was very proud. "Poop's done!"
-I did get peed on all the time during the first few weeks. It was actually with his diaper on. If someone wasn't careful enough during a diaper change, he little wiener was aimed the wrong way and pee would come right out of the diaper.
-He does get into stuff a lot. He is curious about everything.
-He loves to roughhouse with Daddy and that is one of my very favorite things. It isn't a bad thing to me at all. We have been very careful to talk about the difference between playing rough with Daddy and how he is allowed to play with everyone else (including me).
-He is sweet and gentle and caring. When I cry, which I try not to do in front of him but you know how pregnancy is, he comes to me and pats me and tells me, "It's okay, Mom. Don't cry."
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  #9  
February 17th, 2012, 10:37 AM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
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My son will rough house with his daddy too. DH allows Grady to pretty much beat the crap out of him, but that's the only person he'll be aggressive with and I don't say a lot. He won't hit me or anyone else, so it's okay. But yet again...it's what we put up with and not something he does because he's a boy. He likes to fight, but my friend's girl does too. lol
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  #10  
February 17th, 2012, 10:56 AM
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Okay I think your friends may be nuts. Little boys are sweet precious little guys and it's all in how your raise them.


1) There's nothing I can do, but the baby boy will get into the toilet and try to drink the water, or throw toys in it. - Jackson does try to throw toys in the toilet every now and again but we are teaching him that you pee in the potty not throw toys down it and he is learning. he's never tried to drink the water.

2) I will be peed on numerous times - I got peed on once and then discovered that if you put a wipe over his penis you don't get peed on. I also learned that when I changed his diaper and he had a little erection that he was probably going to pee soon, so I either put his diaper back on and waited a bit or changed it realy quick

3) I have to watch to see if his testicles descend since many aren't at birth - your dr will check this every time you go in, shouldn't be a problem.

4) He's going to need a haircut by 6 weeks old and then every 2 weeks after that - we do get haircuts alot but my husband goes every 2 weeks so Jackson just goes with him. That's there time together. And Jackson didn't get his first hair cut until he was around 1.

My little boy is very affection and I have taught him not to hit or bite so he doesn't.
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  #11  
February 17th, 2012, 11:04 AM
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I don't have much to compare to. But my boys can be sweet and loving but also wild. They love to wrestle with DH. They love to rough house. They don't get into fights with others but they do with each other. That may just be a sibling thing though. I was an only child so I don't know.

So I do see a big difference between them and the girls my friends have. But it's nothing that is a big deal
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  #12  
February 17th, 2012, 11:22 AM
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That is pretty funny. I have a 3 year old boy..he is a very outgoing wild child, but that's just his personality...pretty sure he's going to be a politician when he grows up! As for throwing toys in the toilet-my son has never done that...but I have occasionally caught him playing in the toilet water- as with any child, they learn right from wrong once they are caught. I was peed on when I changed him for the first time in the hospital and maybe 3-4 more times when he was in diapers. You learn how to keep it covered and avoid that problem...
Boys are so much fun! You will love having a boy! I'm having a girl this time, so I guess i'm ready for anything!
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  #13  
February 17th, 2012, 11:28 AM
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Sounds like they don't know how to handle their boys!

You learn quick to cover them when changing to avoid getting peed on.
CJ has played in the toilet, but rarely, and usually only after he saw an older (eh-hm girl) at daycare do it.
He got his first haircut at around 11 months. Now I take him every three months or so, or whenever it starts getting weird looking. I do know people who get it cut more often, but it depends on how much hair they have and what length you like!

My boy is super sweet! He is all boy and can be rough and tumble, but heck so can girls. You just have to teach them boundaries (no different than girls).
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  #14  
February 17th, 2012, 12:21 PM
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I feel like my boy is sweeter to me then little girls are to my friends with girls too, but that may just be my biased perception. Boys love their mamas He is very compassionate, gentle, and sweet. See how many of us have boys like that? I don't think you should be worried at all! Lots of girls act rough or wild too. I think it is just personality and how they are raised for sure.
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  #15  
February 17th, 2012, 01:39 PM
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I'm chiming in as a soon to be mommy of a boy My daughter has a fascination with the toilet (she has to flush when someone goes), it's not that big a deal. We're potty training! My DD loves to roughhouse with daddy- she knows he's the only one she can play like that with. I know my little girl is a tomboy and a clone of her father so I figure that if I can survive her I can deal with anything a little boy can dish out! I truely believe it's more personalities and parenting than gender.
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  #16  
February 17th, 2012, 01:41 PM
dream2bemommy22's Avatar and baby makes 5
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People always want to give unwanted advice, lol, take what they say with a grain of salt.

My kids each have their own easy qualities and their difficult qualities.

DS is wild, but not more than his sister, he is gentle and caring and loves cuddling. DD is independant and sassy, but can be so sweet at the same time.

I think a childs personality has more to do with how they are then their gender.

I was peed on like 2 times and once was while he was diaperd, he peed out the top, lol

And DS has never had a haircut. Hes 2. lol

The only advice i have ( other than regular mommy stuff you already know about) is that you should always point his weenie down when you change his diaper, when its up, it has a higher chance of leaks and peeing out the top, lol.
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  #17  
February 17th, 2012, 02:08 PM
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DS has tried throwing lots of TP in the toilet. but we just said not to do it anymore and now he just needs a few reminders when he starts getting curious about the toilet. he accidentally dropped his sippy cup in there recently. but he didn't mean to.

I got peed on a few times for sure. but you pick up tricks for that quick.

He is a very busy boy that gets into things. but it is not a big deal he is just curious and wants to see how everything works. he will take batteries in and out of things repeatedly.

he is no more violent than any girls I have met. just the typical try something, find out you aren't allowed, get over it.

and he has only ever had one "hair cut" lol if you can call it that. I cut a few whisps of the back a couple weeks ago.
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  #18  
February 17th, 2012, 02:14 PM
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Ok, I feel better now Thanks ladies! I just feel like everyone IRL is telling me that boys are so different, and I'm like "they're just a baby, what's so different?" and then they make comments about how I'm going to find out, etc.

Since I have 2 total daddy's girls right now, I love the idea of having a little boy who adores me
Mamma J and JsBaby like this.
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  #19  
February 17th, 2012, 02:19 PM
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As I read the rest of the responses, and reread my reply; I realized I made my boys sound like hellions..lol. They really aren't. They play rough with each other; but know limits and listen (for the most part) when I say to stop. They play rough with Daddy too; but again, to a boundary we've set; and they understand the differences between playing with daddy and playing with mommy. They do play a little rough/get mad and hit sometimes with their cousin; but she is almost more like a sister to them than a cousin. I haven't had any (regular) problems with either of them at school or with playmates though with hitting/being wild. Personality wise, they are very sweet, caring, and friendly. I wouldn't be too nervous about bringing a boy into your family; they are challenges, but there are challenges with girls too-your little man will adapt into the rules of your family and be perfect for you
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  #20  
February 17th, 2012, 03:16 PM
dream2bemommy22's Avatar and baby makes 5
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Oh yea, and both of my kids play rough with each other. They are siblings, thats what they do, lol. But its not malicious ( most of the time anyways). And if things get out of hand, we correct their actions.


As for toilets i never addressed that issue in my original response. both of my kids were potty trained by 2, so there was never a huge fascination with throwing things in it, they knew he was for peeing and pooping and thats where it ended.
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