[Mrs.Paradise]

well I wanted to hear the HB before I started this... just to make sure I was really pregnant! lol


ok so where to start? I guess I will start with my last cycle! lol so I decided to start taking FertileAid and FertileCM because I have heard GREAT things!!! and decided to try preseed when I was Oing... well this last cycle I got sick of temping so I decided to take a break from it all in the middle of the cycle! lol and I didnt get the FertileAid and FertileCm until the middle of the cycle either... but thought hey whats it going to hurt so I just started taking it... and just kept an eye on my cm to see when it would be EWCM! so I finally had EWCM! and we bded with the preseed... so I had been having my usual Endo pain... and went to my OBGYN for my yearly women exam... and my doctor decided the best thing for my endo pain was to go back on bcp's or do the lupron depot shot again... so DEVASTATED I agreed with her... and had plans to go back the next week or so to get all of my blood work done... so we went and picked up my superscription for bcp's... I cried while Mark held me... I was grieving the what could have been... and the whole time there was a little voice in the back of my head that said "test test test" and what did I do? I told that voice to SHUT THE HECK UP!!! lol I didnt want to see ANOTHER bfn... and just wasnt in the mood to see it now... so I went on with everything... waiting for my endo pain to stop so I could get up and do stuff... so that friday we went to lunch with my inlaws because it was my MIL's birthday! so she had asked how I was doing so I told her... and I was still not 100% ready for the change in my life... I was getting to the point where I could deal with it... and then Sat. I got to the point where I felt like ok this is going to be a good thing! I can loose some weight get healthy and be a skinny hooker when Im pregnant! and we can do a little bit of traveling like we wanted to do... so then that night I was thinking man I should really just take a test JUST IN CASE! because I wouldnt want to hurt the baby! so I went to bed thinking about it... the next morning I woke up and told Mark... "honey I think I need to take a test... JUST IN CASE!" so he told me to do it... so I peed in a cup dipped the test in and jumped in the shower... we got out of the shower and I peeked at the test and HOLY CRAP THERES 2 LINES!!!
me:"oh my gosh"
Mark: "what its a bfn?"
me: "no theres 2 LINES"
Mark: "NOT UNH! no its not!"
me: "yes it is look!" as I show him the test!

...

so I decide to take a digi dip it in the pee... and wait... I was sitting there shaking and crying and Mark was a little stunned! and couldnt really move... while we waited he kept telling me its ok! and to breath! lol then the results showed up!


we just couldnt believe it! we were soooooooooooooooooooooooo SHOCKED! we had just gotten to the point where we were going to give it a rest for now and go back to it in a year or two... and there it is staring us in the face! our FIRST BFP!!! so after the initial shock wore off... we couldnt be more happier! we are thrilled beyond measure! we had our first u/s to find out how far along I was... and it put me at 5 weeks and 3 days with a EDD of Oct. 16 2012! I say its the 19th...


and just because... I wanted to do the red cabbage test! because everyone I knew that had done it, it was true! so I did the test! pink/red is boy purple is girl!

so by this Im going to have a BOY!!! cant wait to see if its true!!!

we went to the doctors today! for my next u/s and I think Im right about the date! so we got to see the HB!!! it was 153! I was so happy to see that little hb! I was surprised I didnt cry when I saw that little flutter on the screen or even when I heard it! I looked at Mark and we both were grinning from ear to ear! we are so happy! I cant even believe it!



so I hope I can give some people hope, that it will happen to you too!!!

I did want to add in here just for me... that today made me a non VOMIT FREE pregnant woman! lol

[Tammyms]

Yay for being able to start a journal in the grads section I love your story Jess! It's definitely an amazing one! Can't wait to watch bean get bigger and bigger and for you to finally get to be a mom!

[HappyRRT]

Yay a journal! I am so so happy for you Jess!!! I can't wait to follow your journal through your journey! Congrats

[DaniM0820]

I've been waiting for this journal for FOREVER! soooo glad you are here

[SabrinaH]

Awesome story and I'm so hapy for you. It is great having you over on the October DDC.

[junie22]

So happy you started a grads journal! Can't wait to follow your journey.

[Nicholle ttc]

Thanks for posting this, I can't wait to read more!

[Mrs.Paradise]

THANKS Ladies! I KNOW I would NOT have been able to go through everything without any of you!!! you all were my pick me up! so THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU times a million!! and I cant wait for some of you girls to get your STICKY BFP!!! and become mommies!!!

[Belita]

I cannot even begin to imagine the joy that you felt seeing that second line after all this time. And it's a sticky one!!! Grow, baby, grow!

[Mrs.Paradise]

Robyn it was just stunning! lol I was completely STUNNED! Mark was in so much shock he couldnt get out of the shower!

I have to put this in here or else Im sure I will forget! lol so Sunday when we found out I was pregnant, I immediately wanted to go tell my SIL! and since I wasnt able to tell Mark in a cute way that I was pregnant... I decided I wanted to tell my SIL in a cute way... I wanted to get her a cupcake (one of her favorites!) but the bakeries were closed... so I went with plan b... I had the pee sticks... so I wrapped them in tissue paper... and then got this cute little frog crocheted hat that I got for our baby a while ago... and I was planning on giving it to Mark in his little "your going to be a daddy" bag! my sil knew about it and knew thats what I had in mind for it! she also knew that I was put back on bcps... so we went over to their house with the gift bag... and I gave it to her and she looked at me and said "its not my birthday yet!" lol I said "I know! just open it!" so she did and saw the hat right off and said "awww!" she thought I was giving up on ever having a baby and just giving it to her for her baby! (she is pregnant with their 5th child) and I looked at her and said "no theres more!" and it took her about 15-20 seconds to realize that I was pregnant!!! and she looked at me with big eyes and said "NO YOUR NOT!" I smiled and said "YEP!!!" she screamed and found the tests and was sooooooooooo happy for us!!

but she ended up not being the first person we told! lol we had planned on going on a vacation for spring break with my BIL! and Mark said "well I guess we should call Glen and tell him we arnt going to be able to go on vacation now!" lol so I called him and he didnt answer... so I called his oldest son Tristan and he didnt answer so I called his youngest Jon who is 16 and he was the only one that answered!!! lol so I ended up telling him the VERY FIRST!!! lol he got a kick out of that! he said "so wait? Grandma and Grandpa dont even know?" I laughed and said "nope! your the first one to know other then Mark and me!" lol he liked that! lol and promised he wouldnt tell anyone! lol and I gave him to ok to tell his brother and dad! lol

then while at my brothers house Mark said "you should probably call and tell my parents!" lol I said "why dont you call and tell them?" he just told me "no you just call them!" so I did and talked to his mom and told her the good news! now his family is not ones to get excited about anything... lol they are pretty mellow people... so I wasnt expecting anything from his mom other then wow thats great congratulations! and thats EXACTLY what she said!!! lol they are of course happy for us! but this is like their 11th grand child... lol my sisters say that if you have seen the movie "up" where they get married and her family is loud and his family is really quiet and reserved they say thats how it is with our families! lmao! which is pretty accurate! lol

so then I couldnt tell some people and not everyone!!! lol plus I was just WAY to excited to not tell everyone and their dog that I was FINALLY PREGNANT!!! so I called my other SIL and told her then I called Marks sisters and told them I text his brothers wife a pic of my digi! and it took me a little while to be able to tell my sisters because they have not called me or never invited me for chirstmas dinner or anything... so it took me a week to finally decide that I was going to be the bigger person and call them! I think every day of that next week I would tell at least ONE more person! lol and Im surprised its still isnt on FB yet! lol but I think Im going to wait for a little while before I announce it to FB! I only have a few more weeks before Im in the 2nd trimester! so I think I can wait that long! lol

as far as symptoms go... Ive had sore boobs from pretty much day 1! I didnt think anything of it really... but on Sunday the day that I tested they were still sore I thought hmmmmmmmmmm.... somethings going on! lol it was a O symptom for me too!

I have been feeling yucky! nauseous but nothing too bad... and just threw up the one time so far...

for the first few weeks after I found out I was pregnant and even before really I had bad insomnia... I just COULDNT SLEEP!!! but now I go to bed with Mark around 10:00pm but I dont sleep real great! I get up a few times to pee... and then I toss and turn a lot... but Im now able to take a nap during the day so thats nice... some days I dont get the nap... and other days I do... it just depends!

oh I had acne REALLY bad when I was first pregnant... and I get a few pimples here and there still... but nothing as bad as when I first found out I was pregnant!

Ive had pretty weird dreams! lol some crazy sex dreams! lol but at least its with Mark! lol

Ive been getting pretty emotional about some things... when we were at the store picking up some snacks for me and getting my zofran prescription filled it came out to be a lot more then I thought it was going to be because we got the generic brand... and I told Mark and he was like do you really need this? I almost started crying! lmao something soooooooooooo silly that I would not have cried about any other time! lol

I think thats about it... at least thats all I can think of... as far as symptoms go... but I do have to say that Mark has been SOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE with me! lol the first few weeks he didnt want me to do ANYTHING! lol and he would actually get mad at me if I didnt get a nap in... or wasnt eating enough to his standards! lol so I had to tell him that I was fine! I could still do stuff! and I will eat when and whatever I need to! lol so hes gotten better now! but hes still being pretty cute... he asks me all the time "hows Landon doing today?" or he will say "your blaming Landon already?" lol we really think its a boy! lol but watch its a girl!! lol ok enough rambling... lol I will end it here!

[Belita]

I would probably have reacted the same way!

That's so sweet Mark was acting that way. I'm so glad everything is going well for you!

[DaniM0820]

Landon is such a cute name I'm glad everything seems to be going well with you and I hope the ba symptoms start to subside soon

[junie22]

Landon is a cute name. What a surprise if it's a girl. Do you have a girl name picked out just in case?

[Mrs.Paradise]

Originally Posted by Belita

I would probably have reacted the same way!

That's so sweet Mark was acting that way. I'm so glad everything is going well for you!

thanks Robyn! hes GREAT!!!

Originally Posted by DaniM0820

Landon is such a cute name I'm glad everything seems to be going well with you and I hope the ba symptoms start to subside soon

thanks we LOVE the name! thanks I hope they subside soon too!

Originally Posted by junie22

Landon is a cute name. What a surprise if it's a girl. Do you have a girl name picked out just in case?

thanks! we dont have a girls name anymore... we use to have just the girls name... lol now we dont really like the name we had anymore... so Ive got a few that I like but Mark seems to not like them... and he wont talk baby names until we know what we are having! lol

[Mrs.Paradise]

yesterday I was feeling sick all day! and took zofran but it didnt really do anything for me... but that could be because I only took half of a pill in the morning and half in the afternoon... because on the bottle it says a half... but I dont think Im going to do that if I need to take it again today!

today Im feeling better then yesterday... but still not the best! lol but I will take it! we FINALLY got all of our vacation figured out! well at least where we are going to stay and for the most part what we are going to do... what a BIG PAIN it has been with my BIL and his kids! they are the biggest procrastinators EVER!!! but I know we will have fun with them when we are there! POOR Mark has been stressed out the last week or so because of trying to get them to commit to SOMETHING, ANYTHING!!! but its over now and I think hes happy about that! I told him I hope this vacation will be relaxing for him! and of course just because hes the type of person that doesnt only think of himself said that he hoped it was going to be the most relaxing one for me! lol I cried sunday night thinking about leaving my Gracie girl... we have had her for 4 years and she has gone EVERYWHERE with me! any time we would go to Chicago she went! we went to Texas and she came with us! so this is really hard on me! and I was bawling to Mark and said "Im not sure how much of this is because of my hormones!" Mark of course felt bad and said we didnt have to go... and I told him we did because we already paid for it... lol and he was saying "well if its going to be like this its not worth it to go! I would just rather stay here and loose the money if its going to be this hard on you!" awwwwwwwwww I just LOVE THAT MAN!!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!! I told him "no its ok! I will be fine... I just need you to keep telling me that Gracie is having more fun then if she were on the plane or ship or hotel!" so I think I cried it all out for now... but Im sure I will shed a few more tears saying good bye to her... shes just my baby! and I never leave her! she is also an emotional support animal for me... because I have PTSD! so its hard saying good bye to her! but I think we will both be ok for 2 weeks... well I hope! lol

[junie22]

Originally Posted by Mrs.Paradise

thanks! we dont have a girls name anymore... we use to have just the girls name... lol now we dont really like the name we had anymore... so Ive got a few that I like but Mark seems to not like them... and he wont talk baby names until we know what we are having! lol

I ended up making a long list of possible names for both because I knew DH would veto a bunch of them. He didn't want to talk about them for the longest time. Then about a month ago or so, I think right after the NT scan... when the baby looked like a baby and reality sunk in for him... he became a bit more receptive to discussing names.

So one day I just started listing them off, and he did veto a ton! He seemed to dislike a lot of the boy names more than the girl names. So now we have a short-ish list for both, but we decided to wait to go any further until we know the sex. I would HATE to fall in absolute love with one particular boy or girl name and then have the baby be the opposite sex. So we'll have a lot of thinking to do in another 13 days!

BTW, glad the vacation planning is done. Hope you won't have too much trouble leaving your Gracie for a couple of weeks.

[Micksbabe]

Ok I may not post much but I am lurking and stalking always so excited for you!!!

[katiep726]

I am so glad you PMed me Jess!!! I didn't realize how long it had been since I've been over here! Life's a blur with a newborn which you will soon find out I am so happy for you and several other ladies I recognize who have gotten their bfps! I need to come around here more. When I first got my BFP I didn't really know anyone over here but now I see so many familiar faces I may just come around again

I never felt so comfortable in the DDC as I did with you ladies and you were a big part of that! I am so happy for you and teared up reading your story!!

[JessMitch]

yay just saw your journal!!! I can't believe you are 10 weeks already! I hope its going by as fast for you as i think it has so far

[Tammyms]

Where's your update Mrs. Paradise? It's been like 3 weeks! I miss you! Ug I wish we could text/talk! Darn us for living in different countries!