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A Baby Journal for Jackson


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  #41  
September 4th, 2012, 12:39 PM
kbpeanut's Avatar Scooter!
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This is SO not urgent...but...I remember seeing a pic of your bassinet somewhere in your journal...but it's taking forever to go through Can you remind me what brand/model/type it is...and also, are you liking it so far?

We are considering a number of options for the first few months, and I remembered really liking not only the look of yours, but also the gliding/rocking feature.

Whenever you have a chance...
x
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  #42  
September 4th, 2012, 12:51 PM
Mom2JDub's Avatar (formerly junie22)
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Karin, here's the link to our cradle. Amazon.com: Sorelle Dondola Gliding Cradle - Cherry: Baby

The gliding feature is awesome. Many times in these first few weeks, I've just been able to reach over and push the cradle back and forth and sway Jackson back to sleep. It also has a nice look. And you can also add the wheels if you want to move it from room to room. We didn't install them because we didn't plan to move the cradle.

The only thing I would recommend if you purchase it is buying a cradle mattress for extra cushioning. The "mattress" that comes with it is only an inch thick and quite flimsy. You can find a good cradle mattress on Amazon for like $20-$25.
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  #43  
September 4th, 2012, 06:08 PM
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Wow, it's amazing how he's almost rolling over already! It's so great that he is doing so well. The pics on FB are so cute...keep them coming .

I hope your nipples start to feel better soon.
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  #44  
September 6th, 2012, 03:55 PM
Mom2JDub's Avatar (formerly junie22)
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Four weeks old

I didn't catch up on anyone's journals yesterday because I kind of had a rough day. I'm hoping it was just the "baby blues" and not PP depression. I'm thinking it was the former because I feel completely different today. I woke up just feeling so blue. It didn't help that Jackson didn't sleep at all the night before. When he would "go to sleep," he was super restless. And this new mommy wakes up to every single noise he makes. So I literally got a combined 1 hour of sleep, if that. Then my mom called to tell me that she is not coming out on Friday after all. She is a major flake, so I wasn't completely surprised. However, as late as a couple days before, she was talking all about how excited she was to visit. She says that her boss wouldn't approve the time off because two people were fired and my mom really needs to be there to pick up the slack. I'm not doubting her reason, but it's always something with my mom. I was actually looking forward to her visit, especially since I've been feeling down lately.

So I cried throughout the day yesterday, just feeling helpless. One of my good friends called, like she sensed something. It felt good to tell her that I was feeling like a less than perfect mom. When DH got home, I was crying while feeding Jackson. It's hard to explain the feeling. I don't feel at all frustrated with or irritated by Jackson. It's more a feeling of frustration and irritation with myself for feeling emotionally overwhelmed. And that just makes it all worse. So DH immediately took Jackson and told me that he was on daddy duty for the rest of the evening while I got a break.

I think my emotional state was compounded by the fact that my nipples are excruciatingly sore now. I know that Jackson has a good latch, but I guess I have overly sensitive nipples. And then once in a while, he will be feeding just fine and then get a little choked up and bite down on my nipple. So I used a nipple shield, but he wasn't able to get as much milk that way. So my right breast became rather engorged over the course of 24 hours. I finally just pumped yesterday afternoon for relief, and I got quite a lot of milk. So when DH got home, he fed Jackson a bottle.

We talked about my feelings and frustrations with BF when my nipples are so sore. Pumping hurts a lot less, so I decided to pump exclusively and bottle feed until my nipples are fully healed. Overnight, when Jackson woke (which he slept well last night, two good chunks of sleep), I fed him, calmed him to sleep, put him down, and then pumped for 20 minutes. Each time, I was able to get 4-5 ounces. So I'm also building my freezer stash up. This routine should work quite well, and my nipples will hopefully heal with time. I'm also experiencing painful let down, which is kind of nice in a way. It's my queue that I should pump again. I just wish it wasn't accompanied by leaking. I would normally just wear some nursing pads, but I'm trying to let my nipples get as much air as possible to help with healing. I swear I have leaked breast milk in every room of our house. At night and in the shower, I'm using LilyPadz, and they help tremendously to avoid chafing

I feel totally happy today, so I'm hoping that the previous two days' melancholy will become more isolated events as time passes. I'm really mindful that it could turn into PP depression, so I'm keeping an eye on it and talking it through with DH. He's incredibly supportive, which actually makes me feel so much better. By the time I went to bed last night, I was like a different person.

Jackson has been eating up a storm today and hardly sleeping at all. In fact, he will only sleep if he's on my lap, so that's where he is now as I type this. I'm hoping it means he will sleep well again tonight. At four weeks old, he is up past 9 pounds (not exactly sure where, since I just weighed myself and then held him and the difference was 9 pounds). He's up almost 2 inches from his birth stats, at 21.25 inches. And he doesn't really fit in any of his NB clothes anymore. He's still kind of small for 0-3 month, but he's bursting out of NB.

And one final update - Jackson is definitely playing with the toys on his rocker now. He very clearly looks at them, hits them, gets all excited, hits them again, gets more excited... repeat. He's so adorable when he plays. I can tell that his vision gets better and better because he doesn't just follow sounds anymore. He actually follows sights... mainly DH and me and colorful objects if we move them around. I love watching him discover new things every day.
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  #45  
September 6th, 2012, 04:14 PM
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  #46  
September 6th, 2012, 04:18 PM
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I'm sorry your mom isn't going out. I can't imagine staying behind to help out at work instead of going to visit my daughter and grandchild. They'd have to threaten to fire me to prevent me from going and I'm not even sure that would be enough to prevent me from going.

That's good you're talking with William about how you're feeling. I think the combination of hormones, being in pain from BFing, disappointment about your mom, and lack of sleep would get to anyone. I'm glad you're keeping an eye on it, though, in case it turns out to be more.

It sounds like you're an amazing mother and Jackson is thriving! I can't believe he's so advanced already! You must feel so proud of him.
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  #47  
September 6th, 2012, 04:53 PM
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I love your updates

I hope it was just some baby blues and they go completely away soon. Also hoping Jackson gives you a nice long sleep tonight
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  #48  
September 6th, 2012, 04:57 PM
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Also, I never did say thank you for the link to your cradle. We are heavily leaning towards that one as well! x
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  #49  
September 6th, 2012, 08:17 PM
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Hi Adrienne! I was reading about the sore nipple problem and I think you should use a larger size flange on your pump. I have the same one and while it looked as if I were using the correct size flange, I was still having some problems. I used a larger size just for the heck of it and couldn't believe the difference it made! In hindsight I was able to see that the rubbing/friction was happening at the base of my nipple, right at the areola, and that was making my nipples hurt like mad.

Also, just throwing this out there in case it helps, I would pump until the flow slowed or stopped and would then turn the speed up higher. That would trigger another let down and my milk would flow again, allowing my breasts to empty more. Once the flow begins again, slow the speed back down to help keep your nipples from being "overworked" so to speak. I hope this helps!
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  #50  
September 6th, 2012, 08:22 PM
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Oh, I almost forgot. I suffered from severe PPD after Joseph was born and it was the worst time of my life. If you think you may be experiencing it, I urge you to talk to your doctor right away. Baby blues happen during the first two post partum weeks. After that you are likely experiencing PPD. I'm not trying to scare you, I just want you to know that the sooner you see your doctor the better. Having one bad day is one thing, but if it continues it's concerning. If you have any questions or want to talk about PPD please PM me!
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  #51  
September 7th, 2012, 06:55 AM
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I hope that you continue to feel better and less emotionally overwhelmed. So sorry about your Mom not coming. Thanks for continuing to post! Love, love, love all of Jackson's pics! So adorable!
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TTCing since August 2011
Me (33)-LP on the short side, but no other abnormalities
DH (37)-slightly subfertile morphology and motility


Natural cycles-August 2011-July 2012
August 2012-October 2012 clomid and progesterone
November 2012-IUI
December 2012, cysts from IUI, on bcp

January 2013-February 2013, long protocol IVF
15 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI
All 7 made it to 5 day transfer, 2 were transferred
Only 1 frozen snowbaby
1st IVF


May 10, 2013, lap sx, Stage 1 endo

June 2013 - MA Round 2
Femara + hcg shot
IUI # 2


FET tentatively scheduled for 10/31/13

Have never seen a bfp.






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  #52  
September 7th, 2012, 02:11 PM
Mom2JDub's Avatar (formerly junie22)
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I really appreciate the support, ladies. I feel so much better now. Just sharing my feelings, getting a little more sleep, and having a Plan B for my breast problem (or should I call it my Plan BB ) have me feeling great.

Michelle, I'm certainly keeping an eye on my emotions, and I will definitely call my doctor if the melancholy pops up again or persists. DH is really looking out for me too. I really appreciate you reaching out.

29 days old

Last night was a pretty good sleep night. I put Jackson to bed at 8:30, and then I pumped. I was in bed by 9 and fell asleep immediately. At 9:45, Jackson was fussing. I assumed plenty of time had passed, so I picked him up to feed him and then looked at the clock. I knew he couldn't be hungry, as he had eaten a ton just before bed. So I just let him lie on my chest to calm him. He fell back asleep really quickly, but I always like to give it 15 minutes or so, just to ensure that he doesn't wake back up. What I thought was about 15 minutes later, I went to put him back in his cradle. I looked at the clock, and it was 11:45! I can't believe we both fell asleep like that for 2 hours! Neither of us moved a hair, thank goodness.

So I changed him and fed him, and then I made sure to stay in the chair to get him to sleep. Then I pumped and was back in bed by 1:45. He then slept until 3:45. I did the whole routine again, and we officially woke up at 7. Not bad actually. Pumping instead of feeding him directly from my breast adds about 30 minutes onto the changing/feeding routine each time, but it's worth it. My nipples should heal much more quickly this way.

On a side note, I had been breastfeeding him in bed, just because it was really easy to get him out of his cradle and do it right there. Even though DH has to get up really early for work, he told me that he didn't want me to leave the bedroom. Well, when I switched to pumping and bottle feeding, I have to leave the room anyway. So I decided to do everything in the nursery. And I LOVE the chair we bought. When I use the Boppy and prop my feet up on the ottoman, I am so comfortable. When my nipples heal and I can go back to breastfeeding, it's going to be much more comfortable than doing it in the bed. And perhaps I will avoid little mishaps like falling asleep with him on my chest for 2 hours!

I really like my breast pump, but I know I need smaller flanges. I have really small nipples, so the standard sized flanges actually pull in too much of my areola. It's not too painful, but it is uncomfortable. And I end up turning the suction down for comfort's sake. So I ordered the size smaller today, and I should receive them by the early to middle part of next week. I'm pumping 4-5 ounces each time in only about 10-15 minutes, so I'm hoping to pump more/faster with the better fitting flanges.

Something that I noticed that's really interesting is that my breasts let down when I'm giving Jack his bottle. Just the sight of him eating triggers my breasts to do their thing. So I pretty much just pump after every feeding, unless he's wanting to feed really close together.

Jackson's hair is getting lighter, and it becomes more evident right after I bathe him and it's all soft and fluffy. It's brown now, and when he's fresh out of the bath, it's even a lighter brown. His eyebrows and eyelashes have been blonde since birth, so I fully expect his hair to keep lightening. I was blonde as a baby/toddler, and then it turned dark. I'm figuring it will be the same way for him.

He's been wearing his 0-3 month clothes. It's nice to have a change of wardrobe. And we have a lot more variety in that size. Like he cares.
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  #53  
September 7th, 2012, 03:09 PM
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I'm so glad you got a better night sleep. Sounds to me like you are getting into a routine of sorts, to help you and J through the nights. I'm glad you love your chair/ottoman in the nursery! That's one of our things we're researching right now, too. That, and a breast pump. Reading your tale of woe about the incorrect sizing was interesting, now I know to make sure the one I choose has multiple sizes (either with it or available for order).

I bet it's fun watching J-man changing every day as he grows!

I hope you have a wonderful weekend with your wonderful family!
x

PS. Michelle is a rock-star if you haven't already figured that out her.
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  #54  
September 7th, 2012, 04:12 PM
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Glad you're feeling a bit better! I'm sure you'd wake up right away if you were accidentally rolling onto Jack while sleeping, but I would also worry about falling asleep like that. Your glider looks so comfy! I wish we'd had the space for one like that.

It looks like Jackson is starting to take after your husband and be more of a mixture of your features as he grows, too? I thought he looked just like you when he was first born but now he looks quite different. He's still absolutely adorable either way.
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  #55  
September 7th, 2012, 04:16 PM
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I'm glad you realized it was a wrong size flange issue! I said larger because that's usually the case, but now I know it can be the opposite. I hope that makes all the difference for you and you can pump and nurse without the pain.

And thank you, Karin! You are so sweet! I am always happy when I can help someone out with something or just be there if needed. And ever since Joseph came along and we've faced so many challenges, I want to do all I can to help other moms avoid, or get through, those pitfalls.
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  #56  
September 7th, 2012, 05:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Belita View Post
It looks like Jackson is starting to take after your husband and be more of a mixture of your features as he grows, too? I thought he looked just like you when he was first born but now he looks quite different. He's still absolutely adorable either way.
William and I were just talking about this last night. Some days I feel like he favors me and other days William. He truly is a mixture of both of us, and I just think he gets cuter every day. We're both just so in love with him.
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  #57  
September 7th, 2012, 05:42 PM
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This is how Mabel is. Every other day she looks like my brother or my SIL or both mixed. It literally changes every time I see her!
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  #58  
September 8th, 2012, 09:24 AM
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30 days old

It looks like Jackson is building a bit of a routine. Several nights in the past week, he has fallen asleep by 9:00pm, woken up at 12:45am, and woken up again at 3:45am. It would be great if he would stretch that second wake-up time to 5am, but this isn't so bad. Actually, when my maternity leave is up, I will likely wake up at 4:00am when DH gets up for work. If I could feed him at 4:00, pump, put him back down to sleep for an hour or two, and then shower and get ready for work, it would be a great schedule. Of course, if he was still sleeping at 4:00, I could always do my thing and just work around when he wakes. So I'm liking his little schedule so far. And being able to sleep for 5 hours, even if it's broken up isn't as bad as it sounds.

Holy nighttime engorgement! Of course, engorgement is the worst overnight, but it's been out of control lately. My milk supply has been increasing since he's eating more. I pump after every feeding (unless they're close together), and I've gotten anywhere from 3-5 ounces (usually right at 4 ounces) since I started pumping. Last night, though, holy moly! First off, I've been sleeping with LilyPadz instead of disposable pads because they don't chafe my nipples. Last night, I still leaked all over my tank. So I think that tonight, I will use LilyPadz and disposable pads.

When I got up at 12:45, it took longer than usual to get Jackson back to sleep, and my breasts were crazy engorged by the time I was able to finally pump. I got 7 ounces of out them! And I could have gotten more, but it was 2:30 and I had a feeling that Jack would wake back up at 3:45. So I stored the milk, washed everything, and got into bed at 2:45.

DH was awake when I returned, and we both looked at each other like, "What in the heck is that smell?" A skunk must have sprayed right outside our house because it reeked! DH asked how things were going, and I told him that I'd been up for 2 hours and figured Jackson would be awake again in another hour. So we both went to sleep (despite the stench), and sure enough, Jackson started stirring at 3:45. Sometimes I can get him to go back to sleep by rocking his cradle, so I tried that... to no avail. My next strategy was going to be a pacifier, but DH got up, walked to the cradle, and picked up Jackson. He said that he'd handle him and I should get some more sleep.

This was an even more awesome gesture than it sounds on the surface because he knew he had to be up at 6:30 so he could get his car to the dealership for an oil change and service when they open at 7:00. And he's just staying there while they service it, so it will be several hours. I offered to come pick him up (which I usually do), but he said to just stay home. I really love him so much. And let me tell you, I savored those extra 2 1/2 hours of sleep. I feel so refreshed and will definitely get some work done around the house today... making sure to let DH work in a much-deserved nap. (BTW, Jackson wouldn't go back to sleep when DH got up with him, so William has been up since 3:45.)

Even though I pumped 7 ounces at 2:45, I was able to pump 6 ounces at 7:00. I'm hoping to be able to put 4-6 ounces in the freezer every day for the time being. If I could do more than that, it would be awesome. I could have at least 300 ounces in the freezer by the time I return to work. And I have a feeling that I'll be able to pump more than that. Of course, Jackson is going to being eating more as time passes, so we'll see how it goes.

One final thing that Jack started doing in the past couple of days is grabbing at the bottle when I feed him. Obviously, he can't really grasp things well, especially a big bottle, but it's neat to see him try. It's like he's saying, "Don't even think about taking that bottle away, mama."
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  #59  
September 8th, 2012, 01:02 PM
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Just the thought of waking up daily and going to work at 4am makes me want to cry. I can't imagine doing that, but I guess you have to do what you have to do.

I can understand why you love William so much. He sounds like an amazing husband and father taking care of the two of you like that. I'm sure that 2.5 hours made all the difference in the world!

I guess Jack likes his food!
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  #60  
September 8th, 2012, 02:14 PM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I was requesting a new siggie and saw that Jayden'smum posted a new siggie for you.
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