[MrsJohnson]

I am becoming more and more afraid of labor as time passes. Tomorrow I will be exactly at the 1/2 way mark - 20 weeks. This is my first so I am so nervous. I do plan on having an epi but I am still getting scared....anyone else feel the same? And BTDT mommies any advice/encouragement?

Also - I have been watching birthing videos to try to help prepare myself, lol.

[Avery'smommy]

With my first I was watvhing all those Baby Story shows and a bunch of labor shows which just freaked me out more then I already was(which i though was not even possiable) I was so scared! Come labor day, although the contraxions did hurt, I was able to make to 7cm before I needed the epi.

[Cylence]

I plan on an epidural. I am SUCH a baby when it comes to pain, I really just don't think I can do it. I too, however, have started becoming a bit more nervous.... This is my first, as well.
"What's it feel like? Am I REALLY going to be cussing like that? I'm going to do WHAT when I push?"

Yep, little nervous.

[Kiwi]

I am the biggest wimp ever when it comes to pain... and I honestly didn't think labour was that bad at all! Just educate yourself on your options and keep reminding yourself that at the end of it, you'll be holding your baby

I had a very fast and easy labour, and I put most of it down to being so relaxed and excited about giving birth, due to Hypnobabies - highly recommend it

[emeraldeyedimp]

It's normal to be nervous. I am nervous and I've had two, although part of that is that I just had a baby a little over a year ago so it's still pretty fresh. You will be amazed at how well you handle everything even if you are some one that doesn't handle pain well. I had an epi with both and the one I had last Feb wore off during the push part, the part I was afraid of the most, and it wasn't that bad. It could be that the epi took some of the edge off but I could feel everything even when they went to stitch me up. I think the main thing is to focus on the prize at the end. LOL once you have your baby in your arms everything else goes away.

[Cylence]

Originally Posted by emeraldeyedimp

...and the one I had last Feb wore off during the push part, the part I was afraid of the most,....

Now I'm even more nervous *laughs*

[Mountain~Mama]

I highly recommend reading the Bradly Method. Even though you are planning to get an epi, you still have to labor for a while until they will give it to you. I was AMAZED at how well I could deal with the (induced) contractions when I knew how to deal with them. I don't want to say the pain is all in your head but how you deal with it is. I would rather be over prepared to deal with labor than go into it blind not having any tools to help me through.

That said, I too am nervous to have my 3rd c-section but that's a whole different story.

[Londons Butterfly]

Everyone is nervous, even us BTDT moms (at least I am). No two (or three or four) births are the same. I had three wonderfully easy vaginal deliveries with no ripping or tearing, but that doesn't mean that it will be the same for this one.

The thing I think about to rid myself of the nervousness is my baby. I think about labor only in the end result, my baby. Finally being able to hold him and kiss him. Meeting him for the first time. Everything that happens before that is forgotten, even these long agonizing 40+ weeks baking them.

The best thing you can do is talk about what's worrying you the most.

I'm afraid that like my last two birth experiences my contractions won't start on their own and my dr will want to put me on pitocin leading down a road of interventions that would cause me to end up with a c-section. But I think about my baby and realize that however my baby comes I'll be happy to have him in my life.

[acchickpea]

I'm nervous... I trying to tell myself that I will try to be calm, breathe, focus on something but know that when the day comes I'll be a hot mess! EPI all the way please!

[Corrupt]

I think everyone gets nervous. I'm feeling great about labour at the moment but I know the jitters will kick in towards the end.
I was pretty nervous with DS in the later part of pregnancy. I refused to watch birth videos (those ones on tv are very hollywood IMO...you tube is the way to go) because I was worried they would freak me out more. Truth be told, when my water broke, I was just really excited. Any unease I felt was related to being in the hospital. Once the contractions started, I just lived in the moment. There wasn't a whole lot of room for anything else - you just have your baby.

[~~Que~~]

You can do it! Fill yourself with positive stories and positive thoughts. I second the hypnobabies- they have great fear cleansing tracks. Filter what kind of births you are watching, sometimes that can feed the fear.

Ultimately, don't forget that this is a natural physiological process. Just like pooping. Most of the time pooping happens normally and there are no problems and there is no need to intervene. But every once in a while there is a medical need that needs attention, and thank GOD we have the technology necessary to bring safe outcomes for moms and babies. So what you are about to do is a normal and great thing.

If you are a book reader, Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is also full of many positive stories and her view of birth is very positive and encouraging. She makes you feel like you can do anything at the end of the book. I highly recommend it.

[MosaicWife]

I'm scared too and I've done it twice. Just remember to breathe when you start feeling a contraction, if you start breathing in the middle of one it doesn't work as well. Breathing is a big part of pain management. I breathed like Darth Vader toward the end and it really helped. Also stay home as long as you can. I think the rule is 511, contractions are five minutes apart or less, last for one minute and have been doing so for an hour. Until you get to that point there's usually no reason to go in. And I think most places you can get an epi at a 4 but if it's not a walking epi I would wait as long as you can before getting one. After you get a normal epi you are stuck on that bed and it can significantly slow your labor down. That's all the advice I've got. You can do it!

[Ever]

Birthing videos and tv shows, etc. can make it look more scary than it really is. I don't like watching them because it was nothing like that for me when I had DD and I was pretty nervous going in to have her. Yes contractions are painful but I didn't have to scream and I was very dilated as well when I needed the epi.

Everyone's labour is different so don't listen to all the scary stuff out there! You'll be just fine!

[2pinks&ablue]

I think everyone (BTDT or first time) is nervous about labour and birth, but I also believe those videos and shows make it seem so much worse. Take it from someone who has had 3 vaginal births with VERY little pain medication, that it's not always as bad as people make it sound and it's sooooo worth it!

[lmunoz8517]

If it makes you feel better my first was a breeze. I got my epi at 5cm wasnt even in pain yet, then they had to wake me to push!

[Sherry777]

It's not as bad as some mothers say. I had Pitocin each time, and I still managed to give birth without an epidural or any pain meds at all. The contractions are mild in the beginning. They only get really painful towards the end. The greatest pain is when the head crowns, and then you are already done!

[alicenwonderland]

lol i'm scared and i've btdt lol. i did not use pain meds though, so that may be part of my fear. Just try to educate yourself (positively) as much as you can. I really helps to understand what is happening to you, and the normal progression of labor.

[ufmelissa824]

I've been watching all those shows too, like Labor & Delivery, and sometimes I wonder what I've gotten myself into... But most of the ones that are screaming and carrying on have refused an epidural so they made their choice and hopefully I can make a different one.

[.kelley.]

It's completely normal to fear the birthing process especially for first timers. Just read as much as your can the process, and taking birthing classes always help.

[happywife]

I watched all the videos with my first and had myself convinced that she could just stay in there FOREVER! Then the day came, I had already elected to get an epidural, which I highly reccomend. IMHO, it takes the pain away enough to allow you to fully enjoy the birth. With my youngest DS, I didn't have time to get one, and there is a HUGE HUGE difference. Even with that being said, once your baby is laying on your chest and you're looking into their eyes for the first time, you instantly forget what you just went through. It is the most perfect kind of love ever!