I feel like I need to give a little background information on me before I tell my birth story. I discovered the August 2012 due date board back in January but I haven’t posted very much and when I have, I haven’t volunteered too much personal information about myself.
I had been in a rocky relationship with my significant other for about 4 years when I found out I was pregnant. He is a good person in many ways but he is an alcoholic/addict. I knew that the situation was toxic but never did I consider that pregnancy could be an outcome. I am 42 years old (he is 45). I was taking birth control pills and had been on the same method/brand (Ocella…generic Yasmin) for over 2 years. Because the relationship was pretty unstable there was very little “activity” that would lead to a pregnancy. I did not find out that I was pregnant until I was 9 weeks along. Not only was I still taking my birth control pill the whole 9 weeks until I found out…I was on a schedule C and a schedule D medication as well. This is truly a miracle baby in so many different ways and even though she was not a planned addition she is so loved and wanted.
The father was absent for most of my pregnancy and it was very difficult mentally & physically to go through it on my own. He came once to the hospital after she was born and has seen her a few times since then. He wants to hold and love on her but has no interest in taking any of the responsibility that is required to be a true father to the baby. Thankfully I have wonderful friends and family who have taken up the slack & been extremely supportive. Rylan and I are truly blessed!
Now for the birth story…
I woke up the morning of August 22nd (Rylan’s EDD) with the sensation that my water had broken but I put my hand on the sheet to check and it was dry. I had been having contractions but they were inconsistent. Around 10am I went to the bathroom and my water had definitely broken. There was also a little bit of pinkish show. My water didn’t break with my first daughter and I have to say that is one of the grossest sensations ever!!!...lol I called my OB office and they wanted me to go to the hospital immediately. It’s only about 5 minutes away from my house so I knew I had a little bit of time. I took a shower and added a few last minute things to my hospital bags while my mom went to check my daughter out of school.
We arrived at the hospital around noon. At that point the OB checked and I was 3cm dilated & 50% effaced. She ordered the test to make sure that it was amniotic fluid. She said that if it were positive for amniotic fluid they would start me on Pitocin. If I had been thinking clearly at the time I would have totally questioned that but unfortunately I was nervous and caught up in everything that was going on at that moment. My water had only been broken for around an hour and ˝ at that point. Why would I need Pitocin? I also wasn’t completely concerned about it because I had every intention of having an epidural. My first daughter had to be induced (preeclampsia) and I had Pitocin. I had an epidural & it was a very peaceful birth experience.
The nurse on duty obviously did not enjoy her job. When she was doing the test for amniotic fluid I lightheartedly said “this is the longest minute of my life” and she said, “how do you think I feel?” Nice. It was supposed to take 15 to 30 minutes to get the test results back but I didn’t hear anything until well over an hour later. She came into put in my IV and start the Pitocin drip around 3pm. I told the nurse that I was going to be having an epidural and stressed to her “please do not let me miss my window of opportunity”. I mentioned it several times after that as well.
The nurse came into increase the Pitocin level twice and then disappeared. The contractions started getting increasingly worse and closer together. I called the nurses’ station. A female answered and said someone would come and then a male answered a few minutes later. I told him that I thought the nurse was coming. The male then came to my room and said he was the Director of Women’s Services. A minute later the nurse came in and he sternly told her…”I’m taking care of this”. I told him that I was in a lot of pain and wanted my epidural. That is when I was informed that I could have had one anytime after 3cms. I was 3cms when I got to the hospital!! The director said that I had to have bolus first and ordered that.
A few minutes later I called the nurses’ station again and begged them to give me an epidural or something for the pain. The director came back and said the bolus was not done yet but he would go ahead and call the anesthesiologist. By then my father had arrived as well. Only one person was allowed to be in the room when they did the epidural so my father & daughter had to leave the room. My mother stayed with me. The anesthesiologist had already prepped my back and was about to put the epidural in. I finally said…”You are too late. You are going to have to move. I need to lay down. The baby is coming NOW!!!”
That was when all hell broke loose. I guess they told my mom to hurry go get anyone who wanted to be present at the birth because the baby was coming. My dad wasn’t planning on being in the room during the delivery but daughter and mother barely made it back in time. I don’t know who all came running into the room but for sure the director and my OB was there & various nurses. I was out of my mind in pain and was screaming at the top of my lungs. The doctor was yelling something at me that she apologized for later but I was so out of it I didn’t even hear her. I am convinced that the Pitocin was what caused the extreme pain. I have a pretty high pain tolerance and I’ve never experienced anything like that before in my life.
The director said I needed to calm down and concentrate or I might end up causing more damage. That brought me to my senses enough to help me focus to push. It was 3 pushes total and she was out. A beautiful baby girl!! Rylan Pearl was born at 7:12pm on Wednesday, August 22nd. She was 7 pounds 8 ounces and 19 inches long.
My doctor had a puzzled, concerned look on her face and she said that I had a 4th degree tear. She told me that she would have to do the repairs in the operating room. I was pretty upset because my baby had just been born and they were going to have to take me away from her. I asked about breastfeeding. The anesthesiologist was not available for a few minutes so they let me breastfeed her for about 10 or 15 minutes until they took me into the operating room. I hated so much that I was robbed of that early mother/baby bonding time.
The anesthesiologist gave me a saddle block in the operating room. Even that did not go smoothly. They had to numb me twice before it took effect. The doctor had estimated that it would only take about 15 to 30 minutes and it ended up taking well over an hour. There is a possibility that I will have to have more surgery later. I will know more at my 6-week appointment (that is actually 7 weeks for some reason).
Rylan ended up being jaundiced. I knew that was a possibility since I was breastfeeding and that it was not necessarily serious but I was not prepared for the treatment. The nurses put her under the bili light (phototherapy) with just her diaper on and her eyes covered. Even though it was warm, it was not enough so she was shivering. Without clothes or a blanket she didn’t feel secure so she kept having the startle reflex. She whimpered and cried the whole time, which in turn made me cry. I couldn’t stand not being able to pick her up and comfort her. The nurse told me that if her numbers did not come down she would not be released to leave the hospital with me, which scared me to death. She told me that it was medically necessary that I give her supplemental formula. I was so worried that they wouldn’t let her leave the hospital with me that I reluctantly gave her the formula during the night.
I was very distraught so the nurse on duty the next morning told me that I didn’t have to give her anymore formula and allowed me to pick her up for several minutes at a time. Rylan was able to leave the hospital with me at about 5pm that evening but I had to bring her back up to the hospital everyday for about 3 or 4 days to have her bilirubin levels tested.
The whole experience was pretty traumatic but it was worth every bit to have my beautiful baby girl in my arms! She is such a joy and I am so blessed to have her!!