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Ugh! This really bothered me.


Forum: July, August & September 2012 Playroom

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  #1  
February 6th, 2012, 05:43 AM
InnocentDevil's Avatar Super Mommy
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Saturday, we told his family about the pregnancy, Well, his parents and his brother anyway. One of his sister's already knew and the other one couldn't make it. Thoe ones that do know are really excited for us.

Yesterday on the phone, he talked to the sister who couldn't make it. She's currently pregnant, due in May, but it's a sticky situation because she is pregnant by the cousin of her daughter's father. Anyway, she isn't keeping the baby. She's putting her up for adoption. I disagree with it, but it's her choice and none of my business.

What bother me is this...
When he was on the phone with her, they were talking about his birthday next month and he said, "Well, you'll have a non-drinking buddy because Monica can't drink that night either." When she asked why he was like, "Why do you think?" and her response was a scowl sound and "Ugh why? You do know that this is a life changing event, right?" Tristan was like, "Yes I know that, but we want this, we're happy and I am ready.

Her lack of excitement just irks me. Just because she went hooch-ing around and has an unwanted pregnancy doesn't mean ours isn't wanted!
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  #2  
February 6th, 2012, 06:07 AM
pauriemmo's Avatar Veteran
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That's a weird reaction. I had an unusual response to my pregnancy as well. When a friend told my husband that he had brought wine back from Italy that he wanted us to try, my husband told him that I wouldn't be able to drink. Instead of saying "Congratulations" or something, his response was "She can still have a glass". I don't concern myself with people that can't be happy for us.
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  #3  
February 6th, 2012, 06:17 AM
InnocentDevil's Avatar Super Mommy
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I know I shouldn't, but I took it personally. Tristan said it doesn't matter as long as we're happy and I know he's right, but it just bothers me.
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  #4  
February 6th, 2012, 06:30 AM
lovemyleah's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That would bother me as well. We are not married yet, and so I am expecting that some people will have negative responses, but so far, we have been okay. I hope she turns around for you. Maybe she is just frustrated with her own situation....
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  #5  
February 6th, 2012, 06:35 AM
InnocentDevil's Avatar Super Mommy
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We're not married either and my DD isn't Tristan's, but that's so common these days. Tristan loves Kelly like his own and he's AMAZING to her.

I think she is just too consumed in her own situation honestly. Other than this, I've never had an issue with her and have always liked her.
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  #6  
February 6th, 2012, 06:39 AM
.Nikki.'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It would bother me as well. When I thought I couldnt have another baby, all my friends were having their second and thirds....and I was more than "happy" for them and never let out anything that I really thought. (you know what I mean) I think it is tasteless. Is she younger? Just curious, maybe she isn't mature enough to really learn how to hide her emotions well.
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  #7  
February 6th, 2012, 07:16 AM
Blessed Mommy Of 5's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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It sounds like she probably is just upset about her situation. Try not to let it bother you. I know that is easier said than done. I understand where you're coming from. We haven't announced this pregnancy to family yet. However, many family members (on both sides) were rude when they found out about past pregnancies. It really bothers me as well. The ones who were rude will just have to find out on their own; because I do not feel the need to let them know anyway.
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  #8  
February 6th, 2012, 07:28 AM
mommy2Breana+Brandon's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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it would be bother me as well.

I am sorry she couldn't have been more happy for you.

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  #9  
February 6th, 2012, 08:22 AM
momma_d's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm sorry.. It does sound like she is just wrapped up in her own situation along with a mix of pregnancy hormones! Just concern yourself with ppl who are happy for you and support you!
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  #10  
February 6th, 2012, 11:58 AM
InnocentDevil's Avatar Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .Nikki. View Post
Is she younger? Just curious, maybe she isn't mature enough to really learn how to hide her emotions well.
No... she is actually older. I don't get it, but whatever.
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  #11  
February 6th, 2012, 01:18 PM
palmetto_moon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have to agree with BlessedMommyof5, I think she is upset about her own situation.I'm not excusing her actions at all, and I definately think her reaction was tasteless and not thoughtful, but putting myself in her shoes, If I were pregnant in a tough situation and had made the very difficult choice to place my baby for adoption, it would break my heart to then have to see a close relative welcome a new baby who would be close in age to the baby I'm not going to get to raise. I know that is her choice and she could chose another option if she wanted...but that maybe what she feels she has to do (to do the right thing for her baby). I think that definately having a niece or nephew who is born a couple months after you place a baby for adoption would be rough.
That being said, while you may be sorry for her situation, it shouldn't in any way take away from the excitement of your situation and joy that you guys are feeling. Hopefully she'll come around as far as her reaction and realize that her acting hurtful to you guys isn't going to help anything. In the meantime, maybe just be a bit gentle with her given the difficult circumstance she is in. Even if she put herself in that situation...
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  #12  
February 6th, 2012, 02:59 PM
mrs.a's Avatar Kelly
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That would hurt my feelings, too. It sounds like she is unhappy and maybe a little jealous. There have been so many people who have asked "Is that a good thing?" when we told them that we are pregnant. YES, it's a good thing. Sheesh.
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  #13  
February 6th, 2012, 03:52 PM
beginswithb's Avatar Veteran
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What a betch. Let her be miserable and don't let it affect your happiness! <3
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