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Forum: July, August & September 2012 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By momma_d

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  #1  
February 14th, 2012, 09:17 AM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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the joy my mother-in-law brings me!

we told them about the baby 2 nights ago, and I specifically said no facebook, only immediate family. today I got a text from my MIL saying "I just posted on facebook, is that ok? Mallory yelled at me" (his sister). UM NO THAT'S NOT OKAY! do you see ANYTHING on my facebook about it? it was up there for probably a good 12 minutes before she figured out how to delete it. then to make matters worse, one of our best friends called us. I answered the phone and said "oh my god I'm so mad right now I know why you're calling me". it turns out, she had actually POSTED on said friend's wall saying "Jen Jen Jen... we're going to be grandma and grandpa! Happy Valentines day!" this is the wife of one of derek's BEST friends and we hadn't told them yet. is she serious right now? I was absolutely hysterical when I called derek. we are 7 weeks pregnant, a lot could happen and I don't need to explain things to strangers! I think I must live in an alternate reality with this woman!

oh and by the way, I just told her last night that my dad and his girlfriend still don't know. SHE IS FRIENDS WITH BOTH OF THEM ON FB!
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  #2  
February 14th, 2012, 09:31 AM
Mrs_Crystal_K's Avatar Super Mommy
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I would be pissed!!! My dad did the same thing to me, and I was SUPER annoyed!!! I had him take it down within 10 minutes but the word had already spread like wild fire. I wanted to make the first announcement.

I know your MIL (and my dad) are super excited but it's not their news to announce. That's something for you to do. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.
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  #3  
February 14th, 2012, 09:36 AM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I would be spitting mad! I'm sorry she did that to you.

I told my mom at like 5 weeks just so she could tell my dad who is critically ill - if he was going to pass, I wanted him to know. Anyway, she said "can I tell your brother?"

like NO! I didn't even want to tell her yet. Not to mention, I have never been able to tell my brother, she has blabbed to him every time. This is MY news, not hers!

arrrggg! PARENTS!
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  #4  
February 14th, 2012, 10:15 AM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I was furious. I don't know who knows now, but now I'm just hoping everything goes okay the next few weeks. I don't feel like it's anyone's business if I experience a miscarriage! I'm still so shocked that she wouldn't ask me if that's okay first. Use your brain!
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  #5  
February 14th, 2012, 10:47 AM
momma_d's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thats just rude. It drives me crazy when people feel the need to run right off to facebook and post every little detail of their life. Don't get me wrong, I have a FB, but I don't run a play by play of my life in my feed.

I would be livid as well. I hope you or DH let her know what she did was totally wrong!
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  #6  
February 14th, 2012, 11:01 AM
RunningMommyTo5's Avatar Marathoning Mom to 4!
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Yikes!!!! So sorry! That's just rude! I'm sorry you're having to deal with that. (((hugs)))
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  #7  
February 14th, 2012, 11:08 AM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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He called her and told her she didn't have a right to tell people before we did. She apologized and said she thought we had told all our friends, but she never asked so how would she know?? Still so disturbed by it! I guess what's done is done.
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  #8  
February 14th, 2012, 11:15 AM
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My dad did the same thing. So frustrating!
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  #9  
February 14th, 2012, 11:50 AM
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oh I would be livid!!!! I was fearful to tell my stepmom for this very reason but I was SOOO adamant about it that I think she understood. My SIL wanted to know if it was "facebook official" at 7 weeks, um no!!

people are soooo.....stupid
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  #10  
February 14th, 2012, 11:53 AM
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I would be so mad. With how cranky I am lately it would not be pretty. LOL! I am sorry that you are having to deal with that! I hope that there wasn't a bunch of people that seen it!!
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  #11  
February 14th, 2012, 12:41 PM
curlygirl77's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Aw that's crappy. But giving her the benefit of the doubt, do you think she was just super excited about becoming a grandma and she just forgot herself? Or is she generally a thoughtless person?
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  #12  
February 14th, 2012, 01:17 PM
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Yeah I would be pissed too. This is one reason the grandparents will now when I am ready to have it on fb. Sorry she missed this up for you.
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  #13  
February 14th, 2012, 03:16 PM
JulieMc's Avatar Loving my babies. :)
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With our second baby...my husband posted the news on Facebook like 10 minutes after I told him..but I didn't find out til like an hour later because I had taken a nap. As soon as I found out I had to frantically call my mom and tell her...she did not even know yet...and my sister is DH's friend on FB and I knew she'd see it and tell my mom..and my mom would be upset that we didn't tell her first. Well...turns out my sister did try calling my mom..but my mom was napping so didn't get her call. Fortunately I got to her first. But...I wasn't even like 5 weeks along yet..and he didn't ask!

I hope your MIL was just being clueless and careless rather than malicious in her intent.
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  #14  
February 14th, 2012, 06:09 PM
YumPickles's Avatar Veteran
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Man, I'm sorry about your MIL. That stinks, and I would be so mad! It might be worth having a talk with her and tell her rather bluntly that you don't feel like you can trust her with important information any more. Hopefully it will make her think next time.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JulieMc View Post
With our second baby...my husband posted the news on Facebook like 10 minutes after I told him..but I didn't find out til like an hour later because I had taken a nap.
This is a lot like what happened to me this time around. We told our parents, and I thought we were in agreement about no facebook until after the first trimester. My husband posted it though and the damage was done. Everyone knew at 5 weeks.
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  #15  
February 15th, 2012, 01:21 AM
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Wow
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  #16  
February 15th, 2012, 05:27 AM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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She called to apologize last night, but I'm still not quite sure she realized the mistake she had made. It was more like "I'm sorry don't be mad at me!" I just kindly explained that a lot could still happen and I didn't think it was necessary that everyone knows our business. She said "Well they didn't find anything did they??!" (meaning the doctors) No... but that doesn't mean anything! I just think in the midst of her excitement she hasn't TRULY listened to what I say to her, including "no facebook", "immediate family only" and she was even oblivious to the fact that I had said I DIDN'T tell my dad yet, I would be having dinner with him on Thursday. She said "I thought after you went to the doctors and had dinner with your dad it was okay!" I think she's like WAY overwhelmed with this knowledge right now, lol. Oh well... can't take it back now, just glad that it wasn't up there very long!
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  #17  
February 15th, 2012, 08:42 AM
bettyearl's Avatar Beth, mom to 4 boys
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Oh how frustrating!!! Facebook is a bit of a problem in this area because there are people you would like to know before others but if somebody spills the beans everyone thinks it is common knowledge and shares it on fb!! I think in general people are just excited and happy for you and don't think through what they are doing.
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  #18  
February 15th, 2012, 08:57 AM
amazing_love's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm sorry you had to deal with that Some people just don't think things through. My family did a great job of keeping it a secret but i also kept reminding them not to tell ANYONE and that i'd be angry if they did so they got the point. We knew my MIL couldn't keep a secret so we didn't tell her until we were ok with the whole world knowing.

Hopefully she learned her lesson and will be more careful in the future!
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  #19  
February 15th, 2012, 11:21 AM
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This is so frustrating. Even without FB it sounds like she's the type of person who wouldn't think about calling all of her friends, it's just that now it's way out there for everybody to see. I would be upset, too. It sounds like you recovered in the best possible way, even if she doesn't totally get it.
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