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I have issues - more of the same dissappointment - no need to read


Forum: July, August & September 2012 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By 3Sapphires
  • 1 Post By Mommy to 3 boys
  • 1 Post By Mommy to 3 boys
  • 2 Post By 3Sapphires
  • 2 Post By smashley8
  • 1 Post By Mommy to 3 boys

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  #1  
April 28th, 2012, 08:41 AM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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So, since Thursday, I have been scouring the internet for stories like mine where the doc or tech was wrong about the sex, and I am feeling more and more that he could very well be wrong, but I don't want to let myself be too hopeful - this is not an easy feat.

I asked on a different mom board specifically for my area, if any one had any exp with this particular doctor doing the u/s and I got several "what the heck" responses. They had all been sent out of the office for their u/s's. So that got me thinking this doc probably rarely does the u/s's.

So maybe his 80% with an old machine, and lack of experience is still only a 50/50 shot.

It is going to be a long month. I just don't feel like this one is a boy, It was much easier for me to accept that my boys were boys, even before the u/s's I was unknowingly calling baby "he". DH said that didn't happen this time, that I was referring to it as "she".

Could my desire just really throwing me off - probably.

During the U/S we saw baby rubbing it's head and sucking it's thumb, and I said to DH oh no, not another thumbsucker. Referring to my current youngest who still sucks his thumb and rubs his head.

When he said he thought it might be a boy, he also pointed at the boys and said "it seems to fit" so maybe the boys also influenced his guess. Maybe he just really didn't know?

ugggg!!!! I want to know now!
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  #2  
April 28th, 2012, 09:06 AM
proudmomtoEthan's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Can you find a place that does a 3D u/s? Maybe pay out of pocket to get a good view?
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  #3  
April 28th, 2012, 09:12 AM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I planted the seed to my mom whos is dying to know, that if we had money we would go do it.. maybe she will send us some...
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  #4  
April 28th, 2012, 09:23 AM
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I had that same feeling that this baby was a girl. I kept thinking girl all the time and even would say "she is so cute" when looking at her 12 week ultrasound. If you didn't get a clear picture of the boy parts and you have this unsettling feeling thinking about it being a boy (as in boy doesn't set right in your mind and gut) then I wouldn't put too much trust in the doctor's prediction. I'll keep my fingers crossed that your mom is one, wrong (since she has made comments about it being a boy lol) and two, gives you the money so you don't have to wait. I mean even if you did wait... how reliable would it be in a month with the same old machine and doctor?
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  #5  
April 28th, 2012, 09:23 AM
Kierasmom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I had a doctor with one of those ancient machines when we lived in Miami. I was 16 weeks and he couldn't even find a baby. We went to a better machine the next day and everything was clearly visible. I went all night thinking the child I waited 5 years for had passed away earlier in the pregnancy because of that machine. It was awful and ever since I don't trust those old machines.

I really wish there was a way you could get a better ultrasound. I hope the next one gives you a clear answer.
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  #6  
April 28th, 2012, 09:27 AM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That is what I am worrying about Kim. I am very much thinking about cancelling the next appointment and getting a referral to the peri...

Tara, that is awful! Something like that happened at my last appointment, the m/w couldn't find the HB with doppler so she did an u/s, and it took her a good 2-3 minutes to find baby on the machine, then had to hunt for the heart beat. The machines are decrepit.
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  #7  
April 28th, 2012, 09:41 AM
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Ami that sounds like a much better plan. You said that other women in your area were surprised that you weren't referred out as they were. If you don't then say the next appt goes the same where you don't get good images and it takes him a lot of searching to even tell what things are then you are still waiting and unsure. It's one thing to find out and know if you are having a boy but it's another to still have it looming over you... you can't even go shopping or discuss names or anything until you find out. I don't know how you are but I'm a HUGE planner... I'm going insane just waiting the 2 weeks until DH comes home for us to discuss names and do the big purchases!
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  #8  
April 28th, 2012, 11:08 AM
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Yes, get your mom to dish out the money!!! Maybe as a mother's day gift to you? I know i mentioned this like 18 times on these boards but we also got a boy "guess" (75% was what my doctor said) on an ancient machine, and a few weeks later were told its a girl at fancy high-tech place... I'm confused though, was this your anatomy scan? Because that shoudln't be done on a crappy machine, they need to check the babies organs and everything
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  #9  
April 28th, 2012, 11:43 AM
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Yeah, get another place to do it. How did he even SEE any of the important stuff on that machine?
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  #10  
April 28th, 2012, 11:54 AM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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yeah this was the anatomy scan, he was able to see about half of what he needed to, and I am supposed to go back in a few weeks for round 2.

It is also a bit disconcerting that he couldn't see the heart very well, he says he sees the 2 sides of the heart but can't see if it is 4 chambers. my oldest was born with a heart defect. Anyway, we will be going to get a fetal echo, so that isn't such a big worry.

In the midwife's defense, she wanted to send me to the peri across the street, but with gas prices being so high, and the place being 90 minutes away, I needed to get as much done in one place at the same time as possible, we literally can not afford to go up there twice in one week.
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  #11  
April 28th, 2012, 12:53 PM
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Ami how much are the elective ultrasounds in your area?
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  #12  
April 28th, 2012, 12:56 PM
3Sapphires's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ashley, I looked and it looks like the least expensive is around $120...

I decided I am just going to call the midwife on monday and see if I can still get the referral for the specialist. DH said he would feel more at ease if we know for sure the baby is healthy too.
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  #13  
April 28th, 2012, 12:59 PM
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yeah you need a second opinion, i'm sure if you knew for sure the baby was healthy but a boy you could accept that and move on.. it's the uncertainty that is stressing you
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  #14  
April 28th, 2012, 01:38 PM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Will the specialist give you a better ultrasound? I'd like to organize something for you to be able to do the elective u/s if you want it, but let me know if you don't think that will be necessary for you and I won't follow through with my idea. You deserve so much better than what you received!
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  #15  
April 28th, 2012, 02:10 PM
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I'm with Ashley! You need a better ultrasound... not just to find out if baby is a boy or girl (obviously that is a huge perk) but also with the doc saying the baby was small, etc, you need to know that there is nothing wrong whatsoever. It is unbelievable that they would do an ultrasound where you can't even see the chambers of the heart and only got half the info they needed and have that be acceptable.
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  #16  
April 28th, 2012, 07:31 PM
MJTKNT's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Ami- if you can't get referred, set up a paypal account. I'll donate $10 for an elective u/s. If 12 of us can make a little donation, you can have peace of mind.
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Last edited by MJTKNT; April 28th, 2012 at 07:33 PM.
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  #17  
April 29th, 2012, 02:06 AM
alicenwonderland's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hugs! I understand your frustration
My office has awful equipment too. During my son's pregnancy, i had to go back 3 times for anatomy scans because they couldn't see everything and they STILL could not determine his gender. I ended up shelling out for a "gender preview" at an elective place.

This time, the tech was conveniently out of town the week of my ultrasound, so they had me go have it at the hospital. The difference was astounding! The perinatologist should have top notch equipment and i'm sure you'll get your answers. I would have a really hard time waiting though!!!
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