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honestly... Do I have the "first time" mommy syndrome?


Forum: July, August & September 2012 Playroom

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  • 3 Post By acchickpea
  • 1 Post By 2pinks&ablue
  • 4 Post By MosaicWife
  • 2 Post By JesusisKing
  • 2 Post By Mrs.Julie
  • 1 Post By Jessimaaka
  • 1 Post By tryingfornumber1
  • 1 Post By Mountain~Mama
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  • 1 Post By mama4life

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  #1  
March 11th, 2013, 11:03 AM
acchickpea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: new jersey
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so what... I get paranoid over my baby...
we were over my in-laws house and my brother and law and fam lives with them still...
they have a 1yr 4month.. my nephew....
Apparently he was sitting outside today (it was like 50ish degrees... warmer then normal.. still cold in my opinion) they said that's all he wanted to do was go outside... so they let him... I don't blame him from being cooped up in the house all day long... But there are limits for a baby right?
(MIL and sometimes FIL watches him all day long)
but gong back to the story...
his nose was like a runny faucet... I had to wipe his nose a few times whn I was there... and I saw him sticking his fingers in his nose... then the father in law was holding my baby and he forces them to kiss!!!! Once again the sagga of kissing cousins! But I'm telling them not to push them because nephew's nose is all runny! Nephew was pointing at Leo with his snot fingers and they let him touch Leo all over... And I had to say no no no to nephew because no one else would!
Am I paranoid?!?!?!!
On top of that... FIL gives whatever to nephew to play with... and this bugs me sooo much... he has all these toys yet he gives him crumpled up newspaper (his hands gets all inked up), chopsticks (he may poke his eye out), spoon/fork (ummmm sharp edges....) dirty napkins (germs!)
So when he had Leo I kept on telling him/FIL no to everything he tried to give him!
Makes me sound so paranoid!!!
But really?!??!?!

Last edited by acchickpea; March 11th, 2013 at 11:38 AM.
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  #2  
March 11th, 2013, 11:07 AM
Mom to Madeline
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 3,201
Yeah, you have the syndrome. As long as he is dressed appropriately...there's nothing wrong with going outdoors...runny nose or not.

And, discovery is important for babies/toddlers...so playing with new items (even if it's the paper) is fine.
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  #3  
March 11th, 2013, 11:12 AM
acchickpea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pinkhighheels27 View Post
Yeah, you have the syndrome. As long as he is dressed appropriately...there's nothing wrong with going outdoors...runny nose or not.

And, discovery is important for babies/toddlers...so playing with new items (even if it's the paper) is fine.
I know... I maybe a tad...
But I do let my baby discover new things and the appropriate and safe things to discover.... Not something that they can poke an eye out....
I just can't seem to shake having a runny nose baby kiss my baby with slim all over his face....
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  #4  
March 11th, 2013, 11:28 AM
mzshell13's Avatar Super Mommy
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Maybe just a little bit. But I think most first time moms are that way and you're entitled to feel however you want because it's your baby. I was the same way with LJ. But now that his little sister is here I'm so much more relaxed. I take Mel outside all the time with a runny nose, I can't just stay in the house anymore because of her brother. She plays with my dirty napkin at the restaurant to keep her busy, she loves to crinkle all kinds of paper, etc. I probably wouldn't let her play with chopsticks but my mom had a fit the other day when I let her play with a comb while I was doing her hair. They kiss each other with runny noses all the time. My son gets grossed out and wipes it off, but he does the same to her. I probably wouldn't want a cousin to do that though.
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  #5  
March 11th, 2013, 12:20 PM
2pinks&ablue's Avatar Chantelle
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A bit, maybe. I take my kids outside, runny nose or not, unless they're really down and out sick, they want to be outside. My 20 month old plays with paper, colours with pencil crayons (the equivalent of chopsticks I guess)- the older kids use them, and she wants to colour too. And, sometimes kids prefer to play with things that aren't strictly toys. I do understand the kissing thing, although I can't stop my kids from doing that with each other, I wouldn't want other kids too.

I'm more of a "free range kids" parent (to a point) now though, but with my first I was a lot more nervous about everything.
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Last edited by 2pinks&ablue; March 11th, 2013 at 12:23 PM.
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  #6  
March 11th, 2013, 01:05 PM
MosaicWife's Avatar Missa
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Yeah you do but that's fine. I did too. Runny nose as long as it's not because of a cold is gross but harmless. I give Paxton random stuff to play with too. Most babies shove paper in their mouths though so newspaper would be a no-no, and forks are DEFINITELY not ok. But yeah, if it's close and safe anything can be a toy. You'll loosen up as he gets older, I promise, but it's fine to worry about your munchkin's health. Just shows you're paying attention and care which are two awesome things.
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  #7  
March 11th, 2013, 01:39 PM
JesusisKing's Avatar Veteran
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Posts: 418
Help!!
I must still have alot of first time Mommy in me too then (I have 3) Snotty kisses would gross me out too. I would also be afaid he'd get a piece of the paper chewed off and stuck in his throat, or poke his eye with a fork or chopsticks.
And I hardly ever take him outside if it's cold, other than to and from the vehicle, and then I try to keep him covered. lol
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  #8  
March 11th, 2013, 02:32 PM
Mrs.Julie's Avatar Mommy to 3 Princesses
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Going out in the cold is fine. I think fresh air is always good even if freezing or sick. Fresh air can boost your immune system, despite some people sayoing it gives a cold. (how exactly can being in the cold force a cold virus into your body?) However, the rest I find unacceptable and I have 3 kids. No babies kissing snot faces! And no playing with metal forks...thats just good sense!
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  #9  
March 11th, 2013, 02:56 PM
Jessimaaka's Avatar Pink in a house of Blue
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Ugh to the runny nose. Not a fan! I've always been like that though, if I didn't want someone wiping their snotty nose on me, I don't want them doing it to Cam as well!
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  #10  
March 11th, 2013, 05:09 PM
tryingfornumber1's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Disgusting! I wouldn't want snotty, runny nose kisses so I doubt Mik does either. So gross. About playing with a fork, ***? Who would seriously do that?
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  #11  
March 11th, 2013, 05:10 PM
Mountain~Mama's Avatar ThePastHasNoPowerOverMe
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You have the right to feel how ever you want no matter if it's your first baby or your fifth. Key word there "your" baby. I wouldn't be too thrilled about any of what you described other than going outside. If I stayed in every time someone had a runny nose we'd never go out! Regardless your family needs to respect your rules for your baby no matter what they do with their own.

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  #12  
March 11th, 2013, 05:23 PM
one.juniper's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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First I don't believe such a thing exists, second even if it did who cares as you are only a first time mom once.

That said, I wouldn't want a sick baby sticking his snotty slobbery hands in my healthy baby's face. Germs are good and all but dealing with a sick baby is hell so preferably avoided if possible.

As for playing outside, I think that's fine. Exploring paper, utensils (Id give a spoon not a fork), I think that's all fine too. Dirty napkins - no. Chopsticks, I don't know. I'd rather give a drum stick with balls on the end.
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Last edited by one.juniper; March 11th, 2013 at 05:26 PM.
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  #13  
March 11th, 2013, 07:18 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
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Yeah you do but it's OK. Most if not all of us have been too. As time goes on we learn to be more lax with things. That's why grandparents let their grandkids get away with the things they do. After so many years raising kids, you feel like you can finally step back and just let the chips fall where they may for the most part.
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  #14  
March 11th, 2013, 07:53 PM
acchickpea's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by one.juniper View Post
First I don't believe such a thing exists, second even if it did who cares as you are only a first time mom once.

That said, I wouldn't want a sick baby sticking his snotty slobbery hands in my healthy baby's face. Germs are good and all but dealing with a sick baby is hell so preferably avoided if possible.

As for playing outside, I think that's fine. Exploring paper, utensils (Id give a spoon not a fork), I think that's all fine too. Dirty napkins - no. Chopsticks, I don't know. I'd rather give a drum stick with balls on the end.
Yeah I know... The first mommy syndrome came up in a conversation I had with a coworker.... She said I had it...
I am def pro going outside but I think there should be a limit... They said he was outside all day because he wanted to be out there... First it's great but baby doesn't know the consequence of being in the cold for a long period of time... Also it seemed like he was controlling my in laws and they just let him do whatever he feels... Sigh... I know... Don't stick my nose in how others raise their kids... More so my mother/ father in law then my brother/sister in law.
V-E-N-T
Just no snotty nose kisses on my baby.... :wink:

Quote:
Originally Posted by tryingfornumber1 View Post
Disgusting! I wouldn't want snotty, runny nose kisses so I doubt Mik does either. So gross. About playing with a fork, ***? Who would seriously do that?
Ugh.... My in laws... That's who....
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  #15  
March 12th, 2013, 01:06 AM
HippieLove's Avatar Modern Day Brady Bunch
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Aww honey.. I'm a 4th time Mum and I still wouldn't be okay with my baby playing with a dirty hanky or a fork. However as long as babe has appropriate clothing on we go outside (vitamin D kills germs). You're an amazing, protective and caring Mama bear and you know what? There's nothing wrong with that m'dear
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  #16  
March 12th, 2013, 11:27 AM
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Totally justified! I have five kids and would have agreed on all the areas mentioned! I have become terrified of germs since my first got RSV and pneumonia at two months, likely from my niece sneezing on him in his carseat. I didn't used to get nervous about germs, but when you have seen your child that sick, it's a reminder that no one is exempt from a little cold becoming something really scary, especially in little ones, and the elderly. I even have a very strong conviction about keeping my kids home from church if they have the sniffles. A small cold caught at Church by an elderly person could put them in the hospital, or worse. I take germs super serious.
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  #17  
March 12th, 2013, 04:54 PM
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i have the syndrome too but sometimes i wonder if its just me so i go with it and just keep my eyes peeled for trouble ready to swoop in.

the runny nose kisses thing tho i wouldnt be ok with because HELLO THATS HOW COLDS SPREAD!

as far as going outside well to each their own.

i dont think you are crazy. over doing it? nah i dont think so. everyone parents differently.

as far as the "not toys" bit
well tuckr has a bajillion toys and he still prefers to play with parchment paper (i dont like the idea of the newspaper tho, ink can mbe toxic) we do give him spoons to play with tho. especially the big plastic spoons. tho hes given himself welts from smacking himself in the head with them lol.

but like i said everyone parents different. are you wrong??? most definitly not!
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